My mother is a "re-enstated" Jehovah's Witness. They go to these annual convention things and I have been invited. The problem is, I am a Baptist and I don't believe in what the Jehovah's Witnesses teach. Some things in THEIR bible contradicts what the real bible teaches. My mother says that if I don't go, then she won't. She got me with this guilt trip last year and since I was only 17, I had to go. Now I'm legally an adult and I don't HAVE to go. I just don't want to hurt her feelings. 95% of my family are JWs and they have been trying to convert me ever since they found out that I'm Baptist. The conventions are three days long and boring. Last year, I simply kept my iPod on for the duration and read a novel. I really don't want to go, but I don't want to have my mother stay behind because of me. How do I get out of this one?
2007-01-29 05:42:29 · 23 answers · asked by Nicole J 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
In a Behavioural Dynamics course I teach there is a phrase that "we continue to do the same thing over and over in the same or similar situations ... UNTIL IT QUITS WORKING!"
To wit: babies cry to be held or changed or fed. When that quits working, they find another behaviour that gets what they want, whether it is making people laugh or throwing a tantrum or whatever. Pets do the same thing. If a behaviour gets them 'good boys' or treats, they will repeat it over and over. Adults are no different.
Your mother has you trained like Pavolv's dog. She exhibits a behaviour, or threat of a behaviour, and you give her what she wants.
If you *WANT* to go to their convention, fine, that is up to you. If you do *NOT* want to go, then do not go. You are her equal as an adult with 'free moral choice.' You may be her child, but you are *NOT* a child.
ADDITIONAL:
Funny, I got a thumbs down, which is fine, everyone has their opinion. I'm just curious, was the thumbs down because I said that Nicole was an adult and could make her own choices; or, because I cited the well-documented fact that we repeat a behaviour as long as it works; or, because I said her mother gets what she wants when she exhibits the behaviour, or what?
I'm just wondering, for whomever gave the thumbs down: what part of my answer was "unacceptable"?
2007-01-29 07:01:24 · answer #1 · answered by View from a horse 3 · 5⤊ 6⤋
I'm curious what you consider the "REAL BIBLE". Are you talking about the Bible created and revised four times during a 150 year time period until it match the beliefs of the Anglican Church of England? A Bishop of which six months ago said the deformed children should not be allowed to live.
I'm curious what you're afraid of? JWs have no rituals like other churches. The conventions are attended by everyone and not just a religions elite. They are only for education and association. Because of these conferences, when disasters take place, such as Katrina, every JW, and his neighbors, are rescued. It isn't like other churches where people are discouraged from knowing others of the same faith, in the same city.
2007-01-29 07:48:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
if you are looking for a serious answer, i have a suggestion.
As a witness, i understand the importance of attending the conventions. However, i understand that because you arent one, you're not interested in going, fair enough.
If the convention is in another area outside of your hometown, why dont you suggest that she get a room and you stay there while she attends the convention. Maybe you two can find a happy medium.
Another sidepoint, i constantly see 'Their" Bible on here. well, our Bible carries the same thought as everyone else's. We have used a variety of Bibles in talking with different ones.
I hope this suggestion helps you.
Your mother also needs to stand for what she believes as well, she should go with or without you!!!!!!
2007-01-29 09:59:59 · answer #3 · answered by N-TYC-N 3 · 7⤊ 0⤋
You say you're an adult, but I'm assuming you still live with your mother from what it sounds like. Besides that, I think you would learn something this time. You are obviously a year older, meaning also more mature. So maybe you will hear something that you like.
And if you don't, try to find out why it's they way they say it is.
But you should endure for 3 days just so your Mom can enjoy it. It's not much she's asking for.
And by the way, when is her district convention?
I'm going June 15-17 is SC. And I'm ready and excited to go.
2007-01-29 06:25:52 · answer #4 · answered by ♥LadyC♥ 6 · 5⤊ 2⤋
Do you go to church? Ask your mother to go w/you and see what she says. Don't let her run this guilt trip on you, like you said you're 18 so you have a choice now. My aunt is a JW and she trys to get me to the hall every chance she gets and I've been but I don't want to be a JW, I'm a Baptist born and raised Christian.
I like to celebrate holidays and birthdays. I feel like it's my duty to vote as an African American and if I'm on my deathbed...please pass the blood! Don't let her play you, call her bluff and see if she really stays home because of you. If her beliefs are so strong nothing should stop her from going.
2007-01-29 05:49:22 · answer #5 · answered by Erin R 3 · 3⤊ 3⤋
I had a friend in the service who involved himself in this experience of particular religion before, and have also personally met with some people from this religion you speak of, through my friends involvement in such, and find these Jehovah's Witnesses, as people, to be very warm in personality, and also very nice and ordinary folks.
I feel that by your going to this convention you mentioned above, it may allow you to open up discussions, which may give way towards learning more about this religion itself, and thereby allowing everyone involved you did post of, the same possibility of learning, as towards your benefit in regards to such.
2007-01-29 07:26:36 · answer #6 · answered by Garret Tripp 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Hi oh yes Jehovah witness are very tough to there rules in there religion.... could be a good thing!!!! Well as you are of age .if you want to stay home.Stay home.I would suggest.... Your mom has made up HER mind, not to go if you do not go.. That is her choice ...Your choice is not to go and believe in your own religion..........If your mom chooses not to go to her convention, as a result of you and your beliefs, too bad for her.that is why there is free will.Just ask her to go and have a good time as you have your belief and she has hers.....If she stays home she did not want to go to the convention bad enough anyway. Best wishes
2007-01-29 06:00:40 · answer #7 · answered by yourmallthat 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
If your mother won't go if you don't, then not going is the best favor you could do her. I recommend you get some good books on how to witness to JW's. I wish I could recommend some titles to you, but mine are on loan right now, and I don't remember the titles. But there are several good ones out there. Look for one written by a former JW. I am amazed that you have not been persuaded by their teaching if so much of your family are JW, especially at your age. It's important for everyone to know WHAT they believe, and WHY they believe it, so that you will be always equipped to "give an answer for the hope that is in you." By the way, you are right that the JW Bible contradicts the real Bible. Most people don't realize, when a JW is at their door pointing out verses, that they have their own version of the Bible written to fit their doctrine.
2007-01-29 05:53:00 · answer #8 · answered by BB 3 · 2⤊ 6⤋
Don't let your mother guilt-trip you into going. If you do not want to attend, then don't.
If your mother's attendance is contigent upon you going with her, then she doesn't really want to go either. So don't feel bad.
I am a JW, and I love the district convention. But I can totally understand how someone who doesn't believe in what we do, wouldn't want to go. And that's fine. You should never be forced to go.
2007-01-29 05:50:36 · answer #9 · answered by surfchika 4 · 7⤊ 2⤋
Like you said, you're an adult and you can make your own decisions. If you don't want to go to the convention, then you shouldn't be forced to... guilt trip or not. If your mother wants to stay behind and make you feel guilty, then that's her problem, not yours.
2007-01-29 05:47:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 2⤋