I've been dating this guy for about a year. He treats me very good, and we have a good time together. But I'm not sure that he's the one for me. I think about other guys and so many things he does get on my nerves. Also, he keeps making comments to me about moving in together, because he's over at my house so much anyway, he feels he's wasting money on rent. I know I'm not ready for that. I bought my house less than a year ago, and I enjoy it being "my" house. I love it and I'm not ready to share it all the time w/ someone else. I get smothered very easily and sometimes feel smothered now, imagine what it would be like if we were living together. Now that almost a year has passed, what should I do? I don't think I want to lose him, but I do think I could live with out him too. Am I wrong?
2007-01-29 03:32:18 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, you are not wrong. If you have these reservations now, how bad will it be if he moves in and then you have to get him out? I would wait until you felt comfortable. Explain to him you are not ready. If he loves you, he won't push the issue and will wait for you.
2007-01-29 03:38:29 · answer #1 · answered by blwileygp 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stand your ground, from what you say here I agree that it is not time. With or without any eternal God and parent conflicts consider this is "moving in" can be a red flag that there is something in your relationship that means one of the two of you is not truly committed to the relationship.
Moving in isnt just so you can play house, or for the typical finincial reasons (one house pament, one electric payment) That is when you need to get a roomate, not complicate a relationship that is not yet permanent.
I think sometimes people who move in together eventually get married because that is just the thing to do and there is family pressure, when really marriage may not be the best for them.
2007-01-31 16:43:18 · answer #2 · answered by G's Random Thoughts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't move in with him yet because you still have somethings that you have to work out together. you should talk to him and tell him how you feel before you let him come and live with you. I don't think that you think hes the right guy for you. it seems like hes a good guy but hes not really the one you want ot be with and share your house with.
2007-01-29 11:41:01 · answer #3 · answered by claidifl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No.......You should do what you feel is right for you. Don't let someone make you feel pressured to do anything in which you may have second thoughts or regrets. You should really think about what you wish to do and if you are thinking about other things or individuals then it may be best to prohibit his regular coming to see you and allowing yourself to be put in this situation. Don't ever do what you really don't want to do. If you feel smothered by him then it is best to have things your way and no one else's. After all, it is as you say your house and no one else's. So live as you wish and see whom you wish on your own terms. Feel good about yourself.
2007-01-29 11:40:11 · answer #4 · answered by Lewis P 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. You are right to feel as you do. You know what you want. I admire you for that. Do not allow him to sway you. I would let him know exactly what you feel. You said he feels he is wasting his money on rent. Wow. Red flag there. He has obviously overstepped his bounds and worn out his welcome. He is manipulating you. You have lived this situation for a year now. You know it. Is your gut feeling. Stand firm. Tell him to back off or get a life. Or better yet both!
2007-01-29 11:45:59 · answer #5 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
do you know what is a guy's worst nightmare? an indecisive GF. it is the "what ifs" that bother most guys. if you can't see a future with him, let him go and set him free. it's very selfish to leave him dry. it is not wrong to think about other guys, it is wrong to think about them and imprison your bf in a relationship. you're keeping him for now because of security, you're familiar with him. as soon as you found a better mate, you'll drop him like it's hot. stop the torture and break it off now.
2007-01-29 11:39:48 · answer #6 · answered by Sam T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I certainly wouldn't make any further commitments at the minute by moving in together, so be firm and tell him that - If he accepts it, fair enough - let the relationship play out some more - If he doesn't - You have your answer
2007-01-29 11:37:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in the exact same position right now. It's hard when you don't want to hurt that person, but it's even harded when you aren't happy. I can't really give you any advice because I don't even know what I am going to do. I wish you the best.
2007-01-29 11:39:51 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just aren't ready, I am not sure it is about him at all, I think the timing is off, you know?....Sometimes timing is more important than anything...sounds like you want it to cool down, maybe you should let him know...slow down...good luck..
2007-01-29 11:37:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your not sure about moving together let him know how you feel i think he should understand.... so are you confused or wat? cuz it sounds like you do n you dont wanna be with him.....if your nnot ready to move in together dont, he needs to slow it down i guess let him know hes moving to fast for you.... people understand each other wen they talk........ i think you need to do alot of talking........
2007-01-29 11:47:23 · answer #10 · answered by SW_GURL19 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋