I have been with my partner for 6 and a half years. My Mum knows I am engaged but I am getting married on the quiet in a couple of months. After I am married how do I tell my Mum?
2007-01-29 03:00:30 · 36 answers · asked by tigger_pooh_on_you 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Hey.. my husband and I eloped three years ago and the only person that knew before was my little brother because he had stayed with us the night before. It was a 24 hour decision. We did it then stopped at important family members homes on the way back. My mom was laughing and happy, she wasnt that upset. She understood that we are random kind of people and was just happy for us. Your mom sounds like a good mom and Im sure she will be happy for you more than she is upset for not being there. Since she is such a good mom and youre worried it may upset her, get her a gift or two.. get her a tradition mother-of-the-bride gift and then a realy good picture of the newlyweds in a nice frame. Good luck.
2007-01-29 03:19:45 · answer #1 · answered by PenguinsWife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My gosh!
Is she that bad that she can't be invited, or is it just some romantic thing with you and your fiance and nobody else.
See, the thing is, unless it's just the two of you and no other family members, things will be ok after a while. Now, if you leave HER out when you do invite other family members, it's bound to create a clash.
It's hurtful, whichever way you put it; and precisely because she's your mum, she won't understand.
Why not put her in the confidence a couple of days before so that she can't do anything you don't want her to?
Even two days before? So she only has the time to get herself a proper dress or something.
Whichever way you do it, unless she's really nasty, it's going to cause her pain.
You're going to be a mum one day. Think about it.xx
2007-01-29 08:54:50 · answer #2 · answered by Kc 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound worried! This will be because of her reaction and the hurt or upset you know it will cause her.
Try something along the lines of:
Mum, I love you. I dont want you to be hurt or offended because i'm being wed to the love of my life in private. As much as I would love you to be there, this is something I feel I need to do alone as it's about the unity of our two lives becoming one life. I really do hope you will understand and i'm sorry if this isn't the way you would like things to be. I felt it most appropriate to be honest and open with you and thought you would rather I told you before than after.
I love you mum
That way you have been honest and open from the start. The easiest thing to do would be to write her a letter and post it so she gets it while ur away.
It's your life, you are an adult, you dont need her permission or her their to hold your hand. Go for it! good luck x
2007-01-29 08:16:51 · answer #3 · answered by vanessa 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm a Mum and I would be devastated, But I was a Bride and I know it is the Bride's day not the Mums. If you could involve her in a tiny way or perhaps get her to organise a small celebration after the day she would feel better about this. Happy Wedding Wishes to you. Apologies if you are the Groom not the Bride
2007-01-29 08:05:49 · answer #4 · answered by gaviscon 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not tell your mum and that way you keep the peace. you have not said why your wedding,which should be a family affair, has to on the quiet,are you pregnant,heas the groom got a criminal record??? I suggest you have a heart to heart with your Mum, and tell her how you feel.. Mums aint all bad, most of them are better than you think. good luck
2007-01-29 03:53:13 · answer #5 · answered by IKnownothing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could either tell her the night before or tell her when its all done. Its not like you have only been with your partner for two months. Its your life now and your mum should accept it.
Anyway good luck hope all goes well
2007-01-29 05:28:43 · answer #6 · answered by Pinkflower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be prepared for her to feel hurt that you have not involved her, but it is your day and that is what you want to do then congratulations to both of you.
When you come back from wherever you are going, make sure to visit her as soon as you possibly can, take some flowers and champagne and tell her you have news to celebrate, pop the cork and say "Guess what??? We're married!!!!!"
2007-01-29 21:36:12 · answer #7 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, Mum I just got married.
2007-01-29 03:28:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh thats a hard one. if your mum has been there for you throughout the years then i feel you owe it to her to tell her before. it will probably really hurt her if you don't. I think you should really think this 1 through. if it were my daughter getting married without telling me id go nuts and feel hurt. shes accepted your engaged to be married im sure she can accept the fact that you wish to get married in private. good luck
2007-01-29 03:06:55 · answer #9 · answered by fate 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you should just visit her and tell her, explain your reasons for not wanting a big wedding etc. She may be sad and upset at first but I'm sure she will respect your wishes. Maybe you could have a get together for all of your friends and family afterwards ?
2007-01-29 03:08:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋