I am invited to my brother's engagment party he is having a little party only the close family members but the problem is my older sister is also going who i dont talk to because she caused alot problems to me throughout my life and I havnt spoken to her for the last four years and I am happy this way and I dont want to see her or talk to her but how can i go to the party and do this and not show the other people that we dont talk to each others , I am looking for a reason to excuse myself from this party without hurting my brother please give me your honest opinion and if you tell me that I can go and there might be a chance of reconcilition between me and her that is not going to happen because there is a lot damege is been done please help me . thanks
2007-01-29 02:51:10 · 16 answers · asked by Yahoo User 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You need to put your own problems aside...this is about your brother, not you.
2007-01-29 02:55:24 · answer #1 · answered by rickeber31 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should go because this is your brothers special day!. Be mature about this and think about what is the right thing to do, can you alienate your brother from your life? because I'm sure he would be really hurt if you didn't show up as i think he may know the two of you don't talk. It isn't hard to work out why you didn't go!! Just go you don't have to be overly friendly just say hi, bye to your sister if you are put in that position. I'm sure you will have other people to catch up with and before you know it the evening will be over , you would have made your brother very happy and you will be proud of your self.. One more thing please don't go if you or your sister will cause an argument at your brothers party.
Nothing worst than long time bad memories. You will be proud of your self in the end. Relax and enjoy. Peace is bliss!!.
2007-01-29 11:10:43 · answer #2 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell your brother what is going on and have
him coordinate that you will be at the party from, say
7 to 9, and she will be there from 10 to 12. Change hours
as appropriate.
If you don't want to let your brother in on this, then
you suddenly acquire a case of Social Anxiety Disorder
which makes you shun parties and you're working with
your therapist on it, and maybe you could treat him and
his fiancee to a special party with just the 3 of you...
But lying will cause more problems in the long run.
2007-01-29 11:00:09 · answer #3 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear lola, I think you should go and enjoy.... I dont know if ignore would be the best word, but you should try to act if it doesnt matter if your other sister is there, you say she was the one that caused the trouble, soI assume you have peace of mind... You can be there, acting as if it doesnt affect you ( which it shouldnt) and dont look at her or make any trouble. Just show off, really happy for your brother.
Another thing, is dont be rude to your sister, if she greets, you you smile and say hi.. If she talks, just keep the flow. Just remember if you have done nothing bad, just be happy and cool.. But dont miss the party, put your best face and ENJOY!!!
2007-01-29 10:56:04 · answer #4 · answered by myself! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you love your brother, you should go. Stay away from your sister, it doesn't have to matter that people will know you two aren't getting along! Ignore her & stay on the other side of the room. Your brother shouldn't suffer because you & your sis are fighting...
Also, keep in mind that you have to look at the BIG picture. Do you really want to die fighting with your sister?? 4 years is a long time to harbor resentment!
2007-01-29 11:01:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, you need to put your feelings about your sister aside and be there for your Brother. Why make him pay for the problems you have with your sister? You don't have to talk to your sister, just pretend she isn't there. You can do this for an hour or so for your Brother's sake. Be mature and be a good sister. Show up for your Brother.
2007-01-29 11:01:47 · answer #6 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to put the past in the past and move on. How do you're brother is going to feel if he finds out why you don't want to be there. The issues you have with your sister should not get in the way of you helping your brother celebrate his special day..are you planning on missing the wedding too since she'll be there. Maybe it's time to reconcile with your sister, be the bigger person.
2007-01-29 10:59:29 · answer #7 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be there for your brother not for her. im sure that no excuse in the world can cover up for you missing out. just try to keep your distance from her through the nite....whatever she did it must have been major...you know to not talk to your sister and stuff..but none the less just do the party try to have a good time and show your brother so sincere happiness! good luck!
2007-01-30 03:06:50 · answer #8 · answered by Suze 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should put your feelings aside and think about your brother. What happened wasn't his fault and he shouldn't have to suffer for it. It wouldn't be fair to him. I lived all my life not being able to invite my mom to things because my dad didn't want to see her. When I got married I didn't even have a choice of who I wanted there because my dad decided he wasn't going to go because of my mom. Don't make your brother go through the same kind of thing. Just go and don't worry about her. Do your own thing. I'm sure it will make your brother happy.
2007-01-29 12:23:05 · answer #9 · answered by netlee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
O hon, go to your brother's engagement party and settle things out. Everything will be alright, that's the best way to solve a problem.
2007-01-29 10:59:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be completely obvious that you don't speak. Try to stay with other people who aren't particularly close with her all the time. But make sure you go; if my best friend was getting married, and the best man was my worst enemy, I would still go to the wedding because I want to support my friend. Likewise, go for the sake of supporting your brother.
2007-01-29 10:58:41 · answer #11 · answered by bisous148 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋