My girlfriend and I have been together for about two years and have been in an apartment together for 2 months. I have a 2 year old daughter, am finishing school and working part time and she is working full time. We always like going out together (she likes to go out more than me) but just a few days ago we were a little mad at each other and she goes out all night getting drunk while I'm at work, doesn't say anything about it when I text her. I find her after hours and call it off with her and she gets an ex boyfriend take her home and they crash his car totalling it. Now we're stuggling and circling the drain with the relationship. We arn't even at the apartment anymore. Of course there are isssues on both sides but what do I do or is it over?
2007-01-29 02:28:47 · 26 answers · asked by K.S. THiS 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe she has some growing up to do! I would call it off.
2007-01-29 02:34:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The going out all night and getting drunk was just her wanting your attention.She doesnt think you love her enough.I'm sure she feels really bad about the ex and the wreck,but you really shouldnt have left her there.If you found her,you should have taken her aside,told her how much you love her,and tell her you were going home.Some times you have to step up and take control of the situation,especially if it is as important as you seem to feel it is.I hope she doesnt have a drinking problem,cause that could be a different thing all together.Talking together is the best bet.Tell each other what you want from the other and if the other person cant give you what you need,then you go from there.Good luck with whatever you do.Relationships are hard.
2007-01-29 02:52:10 · answer #2 · answered by GranGran 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever there is a relationship when one partner crosses the path of respect, then it is time to take a stand. She obviously feels she can push you around and show total disregard for your feelings, which is total disrespect. Remove yourself from the relationship for now. Let her know that you are not happy with how things have been going and need time to think if this is what you really want. After saying this, do not contact her at all. Time will let her know that you are serious. If she by then comes to terms and shows a willingness to work on the relationship, then it is up to you to see if the relationship would be worth saving. Personally, sounds as if she still has a lot of growing up to do. Hope all turns out well for you with whatever you decide. Good luck to you!.
2007-01-29 02:40:14 · answer #3 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to ask yourself if you are willing to stick this out even through the bad times. You say you have been together for 2 years and Iam sure there have been ups and downs. People go through stages in thier life and in their relationships. Sometimes, because we misbehave and do things that our partner dislikes is not always just cause to end the relationship. People change over time and how she behaves at this time in her life may not be who she is in the next stage of her life. It is irresponsable for her to get drunk and stay out all night, that is disrespecting you. Contacting an ex is a way of escape and security for her since you called it quits that night. Sit down with her and ask her and yourself where this realtionship is going, as you desire to move forward with her in healthy and non-destructive ways. If she is open to this you can overlook her drunken state that night.(without reminding her of it) but if she continues, then you need to re-evaluate what is best for the future of BOTH.
2007-01-29 02:42:28 · answer #4 · answered by LisaLou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a girl's point of view:
Regardless of the fact that you guys were arguing, she shouldn't have went out while you were at work and not told you about it, that is immature. Adults work issues out, not run to the club and get drunk over them. You are in school, working, and trying to raise a child. You don't need silly little games. If you think you can work things out, and you really love her, then try. But you need to let her know, very clearly, that you cannot tolerate this childish behavior from her. Either she will shape up and you guys will work this out, or it will be over for good. Besides, there are plenty of ladies that would kill to have a guy that is as goal-oriented as you sound. Good luck!
2007-01-29 02:39:20 · answer #5 · answered by spoiledrottenchica1987 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you were wrong in getting so upset with her because she went out. You know she likes to go out, you were working....was she supposed to sit around the apartment and do nothing all night? If she did not lie to you about anything.....what was the big issue? Did you find her in the arms of another man? I think you overreacted which in turn made her make a very unhealthy decision. If this relationship is to go anywhere, you need to start trusting each other. It may be too late to salvage the relationship in which case you should decide who is staying in the apartment and go ahead and break all ties.
2007-01-29 02:36:04 · answer #6 · answered by Stephanie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have to admit to yourself that you two were just playing house. It seems you have a lot on your plate. How about concentrating on finishing school, getting a full time job after graduating (maybe you could start there now,working part time or as an apprentice) and be the best dad you can be to that little girl of yours. Sounds like all that should keep you plenty busy if done right.
2007-01-29 02:35:30 · answer #7 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a bump in the road, and these are the things that test relationships. So she went out and got herself into a sticky situation. She was feeling a little confined, as all people do after a time. Forgive her. If she assures you that this is not going to be a pattern then there's no reason to scrap two years over a bad judgement call. We all make mistakes.
2007-01-29 02:35:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, almost the exact thing happened to me and my boyfriend this weekend. I met my x-boyfriend at the mall after me and my boyfriend got into a fight (but we still went out) I didnt answer his phone calls all night or text him back. That was my way of telling him i think we should take a break and see other people. But he showed me how much he cared about me and i didnt last 1 day without hearing his voice so needless to say our "break" didnt work and we have a few problems to work out but i still love him more than anything so maybe my situation will help you decide what you wonna do. goodluck.
2007-01-29 02:43:46 · answer #9 · answered by CountryGirlygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a moment to review the situation. Is this a first time or a regular occurence? People will make mistakes and we all need a little (or lot) or forgiveness now and then. Sit down and talk to her and more importantly listen to her. If this is a regular occurence or if she simply refuses to communicate like a mature human being then it probably is time to move on. Best of luck to you.
2007-01-29 02:36:48 · answer #10 · answered by fly guy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some questions
1) Does she always go out and get drunk often?
2) How come she is with her ex when she was with you for about 2 years already?
If it is her lifestyle and it constantly happens, I think that is hard to change and probably not advise you to try to change her. Its either that you got to accept her as she is or not.
If you intend to move on in life and into a marriage then, you probably got to be accepting.
If its something rare that happen, then talk it out and try to understand what happened.
2007-01-29 02:35:40 · answer #11 · answered by littlepurplebugz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋