OMG I love my mother sooooooo much......????

Question

But we cant stop arguing.I am 16 and she's 40,we dont have a generarion gap,she's open minded.I am the best student at school,or anything that i do,i hang out with a nice crowd!But t's either my messy room,not wearing clothes she fully approves of(although she pretty much likes the way I dress).I know she is too concerned about me and she does it out of her love,but it is soul-out-wearing.....I know I am wrong at everything and it is my fault if we argue.I love her so much and I can't take this anymore.She and dad are the people who I would give my life for....

Answer 1

Tell Your mom all of what you just said to us and the listen to her ...this is normal you are not a awful person you are a teenager and you moms baby is getting ready to leave her so enjoy the time you have and listen to her for she does know best it would seem that based on what you have said she has already done a great job so she must be doing something right...Good Luck

Answer 2

Your mother is worried about you. All parents worry about their teenagers. There is so much going on and there is so little information we get from you. It sounds like she's sweating the small stuff (mainly because there isn't any big stuff). Let her know how much you love her and talk with her about the small things that turn into big arguments. Try to negotiate -- your bedroom, tell her you'll make your bed and try to keep clothes off the floor --- your clothes, find out what outfits she doesn't approve of and why and negotiate from there. There are times my daughter wears a cami and I just ask her to wear a shirt over it. That way I feel she's covered and she gets to wear the cami she likes. Try to be open and not so secretive. I know it's normal to not disclose everything as a teenager, but remember if you give the impression there is something to hide, parents will believe it and think of the worse things and really get scared for their teen. You're a sweet caring daughter, talk to your mom. She loves you and wants the best for you. Good Luck!

Answer 3

1. It is normal to disagree with your mom. It's part of you becoming your own person and no longer being her baby. But remember, you WILL always be her baby and she wants you to be safe and protected. So she tries to tell you what her wisdom of years has taught her.
2. Shut up and listen. It takes 2 people to argue. You don't have agree with what she says or like what she says. But listen. Store the things she's telling you for later.
3. Use some accepting phrases:
"Oh, I hadn't thought about it like that." or
"I'll keep that in mind."
even, "Do you really think so?"
These aren't concedences, but acceptances. She has a different opinion and that is OK.
Decide before you open your mouth,"Do I love Mom enough to give in on this one?" and "Is this a battle I want to engage in?"
4. Chances are she's right about the big issues (IE: dating, boys, sex, curfews, saving money, driving, job, even--yes--appropriate attire). While other issues (music, style, make-up, and your room) are irrelevent.
Remember hind sight is 20/20. She was 16 once. And 1985 was A WHOLE LOT like 2007--only the clothes weren't so skanky. Believe me sex hasn't changed..we just see it more now.
5. So give in some. Don't be skanky in your dress. Use the respect and manners you learned in kindergarten. Clean your room to a reasonable level of safety. And bite your tounge--ALOT. You may have a 16 year old daughter some day.

Answer 4

Mothers are just that way sometimes and I don't even think that they know why they must fuss and argue over every little thing. You will have to learn really quick like that your mother most likely won't change. You will just have to find ways to connect with her on a different level. Try to keep your room clean and open up and talk to her more. She probably feels like she is losing control or touch with you as you get older. Try to include her in as many things as you can. Make her feel like she is needed. She is grasping for some control, you are growing up and she can't do anything about it.

Answer 5

There's a thing about moms and daughters, you're at the age where its natural for you two to argue. However keep in mind that until you get out of the house, it's your mom's rules that should apply. Give both of you a break and try and chill until you go to college!

Answer 6

Please understand that you have life ahead.

Parents are good for one particularly for girls. But at one point of time you have to wean out to become a matured and adjustable person to lead a happy married life.

Now a days, in my opinion, marriages break mainly as a result of this too much of bond with parents particularly 'mother'. People do not realise even after the damage is caused. Please take care.

Answer 7

She's your mother and she knows what's best for you and everything, im sure alot of teens your age has teh same problem at home! But be greatful taht she cares. Also, just have a talk with her and hopefully all will be well.

Answer 8

In all fairness to your mother, I wouldn't want to be raising a teenager in this day and age..(been there, mine are 28 and 32), but in fairness to you, you sound very responsible and caring and she should relax and cut you some slack!!! Try talking to her and ask for her trust and understanding until you give her a reason not to!!

Answer 9

Sounds like a typical teenage daughter & mother relationship. She just cares about you.

Answer 10

Sit down and talk with her. There might be something about your life that she particularly doesn't care for, or you might just be over-reacting. Talking with her will help out a lot, though.