I have 2 beautiful girls to 2 different fathers, the eldest has visitation on weekends every fortnight and that works, is sorted. the youngest - 6months, her father lives an hour away and he wants to alternate weeks - i have one week and he has the other. i can understand his want and need and love to want to spend as much time with his daughter and i want to fully support and help him foster a wonderful and positive relationship with her. But i think week on and week off is too much for a 6month old, babies need stability and a set routine, yes they can adapt but they stil need routine, i have suggested with him that her have every fortnight from friday to sunday - until he moves back to where we are, this is his decision and goal - then once she is a little older and more familiar of him, then it can move up to sleep overs and then shared custody. please i reallly want to know your opinions on this, my head is reeling from it!
thanks :)
2007-01-29 00:02:58 · 5 answers · asked by Helen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You're definitely right on this one! You daughter is too young for such a schedule. Can you imagine how hard it would be for an adult to live in one house one week and another the next week. Back and forth would make our lives hectic and chaotic. Her father needs to do what is best for the child. Right now, the best thing for a six month old is to be with it's mother and have a stable home. Once she gets older and he lives closer then it will be easier for him to see her and spend more time with her. It may be difficult for the father to go two weeks without seeing his daughter, but it also may give him even more incentive to move closer. His relationship with her is important, but her stability and routine are of the upmost importance. Both of you are loving and caring parents, lucky little girl! Good Luck!
2007-01-29 01:32:48 · answer #1 · answered by Kimmi 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You say your daughter needs stability. Isn't that silly? The stability she needs is to have her mom and dad married and at home, loving their children and taking care of them. Do you really like this situation? Well, your kids will most likely do the same. Have different men and kids by them without a commitment of marriage. I'm sorry, this subject just kills me. There are absolutely no excuses and you can still change that and make a difference in the kids life. Have there been times when I wanted to get divorced? Sure there have. It's normal. But I have children and so I make any change I can to make sure my kids have mom and dad at home, working out disagreements and problems. Please think about it. Once you have kids, it's all about them. That is the adult thing to do.
2007-01-29 00:31:45 · answer #2 · answered by VW 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The one sentence that jumped out to me was “once she is a little older and more familiar of him”…this is her father you’re talking about, not a stranger. How do you think limiting her time with him is going to work toward making him ‘more familiar’ to her?
Spending an equal amount of time with her father is no way harming your child. It’s allowing her to build a bond with him. All a baby cares about is being loved and protected. It does not matter to them what house they happen to be sleeping in that night.
2007-01-29 01:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by kp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i share joint costudy for my son we do week to week we've been doing this sence he was 11 months old it works out fine we live in the same town in the same school district if you implement a plan and stick with it it will be stability for her she's his two and unless your still solely breast feeding i'd start soon as possible it longer you wait the harder it will be on her
2007-01-29 00:30:39 · answer #4 · answered by auntie s 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you on this one. You're plan sounds good and it, and your right a 4week on and week off is really unhealthy for a baby!
2007-01-29 00:16:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋