I have met a guy who is 46. All his friends are in their 20's and female. He has very few male friends. He seems to like their attention but I am worried it is a sign of immaturity. He has never been married or had children. I feel uncomfortable with this but I don't think I have a right to try to change him. Maybe we are just not walking the same walk. I don't think he sleeps with any of them but I just feel arkward about it. Maybe because my daughter is nearly 20. He says everyone his age is in relataionships. He has just gone abroad and has met up with several young Spanish women there. I don't know what to think.....
2007-01-28 18:18:13 · 16 answers · asked by Sarah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yuck, avoid that guy. It is alright to have well established friendships with the opposite sex but several of the things that you listed are red flags. He complains that women his age are taken (bs, by the way)... so what does that have to do with making more and more female friends in their 20s? He could as easily make friends with married women in there 40s, if what he is looking for is purely platonic female relationships. He may not date these women but he is getting something out of the relationships he keeps with them. He probably has low self-esteem and gender issues.
Congrats to you for not falling in a common pitfall: don't try to change him. It's futile. Just walk away. Find yourself someone secure enough with their sexuality and self to have age appropriate relationships. You don't want to spend the rest of your relationship together wondering.
2007-01-28 18:29:40 · answer #1 · answered by JustTalking 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its a matter of opposites attract, I am a male and I have mostly female freinds, my wife has mostly male friends. If he is trustworthy trust him. It sounds like you are early on in the relationship at this point maybe you should just ask him. You are both adults. If in fact he is sleeping with them, then maybe you two should discuss the state of things before you proceed into the relationship. It would be a shame to invest time, and emotions just to find out you two were not ont he same page with this, or any other issue that may cause you (or him) concern.
2007-01-29 03:03:54 · answer #2 · answered by mabbdog00 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he have a job that brings him into contact with lots of younger female colleagues? Does he work in the "yoof" industry and need to keep "in the groove". It must be very intimidating for you with all his 20 nothing girlfriends. You are really going to have to talk to him about this if you want a future with him. He says all his his older friends are in relationships. So if you two are now a couple shouldn't you be spending more time with them?
2007-01-29 02:55:44 · answer #3 · answered by pwei34 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it could be one of two really.
One; he could just be friends with them and like their company. He might be and out going person that every one gets on with.
Two; he could be a player.
They way you are thinking is that you dont trust him and seems like you never would so I would just walk away and find some one that you can trust and likes what you like to do.
Good luck and all the best.
2007-01-29 05:05:03 · answer #4 · answered by Pinkflower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you will end up being another one of his female friends. I doubt if he will ever marry - why should he bother ? If marriage or commitment is what you're after, you are definitely not walking the same walk.
2007-01-29 03:04:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tamzin i'll think for you! taking in all the things you say, he's gay, surely there must be signs for you to see//so if you want my advice get away sharpish he's not for you
2007-01-29 03:43:46 · answer #6 · answered by srracvuee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he feels he can relate to them better than people his own age. Have to say though I wouldnt like it if I were you.
2007-01-29 02:38:06 · answer #7 · answered by lesley s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run, Sister. The older he gets the younger they will get.
2007-01-29 02:23:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
runn! he may say he doesnt sleep with them, but you know he WANTS to... cmon in his 40's many young "girl" friends in their 20's... thats something is wrong with that... very wrong
2007-01-29 02:28:09 · answer #9 · answered by sick1withasmile 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well all i can say is: dont bother yourself my sister.. there is a lot a lots of men out there. dont bother yourself thinking that kind of guy...they say that: old carabao eat young grass.. how is that?
2007-01-29 03:58:05 · answer #10 · answered by bubblegirl07 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋