My husband is always getting frustrated at the fact that my daughter, who is 1 1/2, makes a mess when she eats. He says that I don't make any attempt to try to teach her table manners! I try to explain to him that she has to practice eating before she masters it, but he insists that he has known plenty of 1 and 2 year olds who didn't make messes when they ate. He can never name them, though. So, is the way he feels normal?
2007-01-28 14:37:02 · 16 answers · asked by rtobor84 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Table manners at this age are not throwing food or purposely dumping their milk. I have an almost 3 year old who my husband claims shouldn't put up resistance on going to bed and that he knows kids that go bed with out telling you, "no" or "another story" or "I need to potty" or any of the other stalling techniques, maybe they are the same children! I think he has some unrealistic expectations, but you can always ask him to try and teach her some manners, otherwise she's fine. Toddlers learning to self feed are messy (it's a hard skill to master, heck I still miss my mouth on occasion lol) as long as she's not delibrately making the mess don't worry about it you're doing fine. BTW, a drop cloth like you use for painting workes great under a highchair.
2007-01-28 14:49:34 · answer #1 · answered by melissajeanwilson 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is being very unreasonable, if he can find a 1 1/2 yr old that can eat without making a mess, let me know. This is a toddler, it what they do until they learn otherwise. If it bothers him that much feed your daughter at a different time so he won't have to see or get her a little table of her own to eat at. Your husband is not normal.
2007-01-28 17:31:21 · answer #2 · answered by Cocoa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not my son is 2 and he makes a mess not as big as he used to because he has been feeding himself for awhile but you were right it takes some time for them to master that I don't think I know any 1 1/2 year old who eat without making a mess
2007-01-28 14:44:13 · answer #3 · answered by mom of 2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At least he still lets her try, and you don't stop letting her do it herself. My aunt used to be worried about the mess,(she's a real perfectionist) to the point where, her kids got so used to being fed they are now 5 and 6 and still don't eat well unless they are being fed by my aunt. Pretty scary eh? I wouldn't worry about it, next time he says something like that, I would tell him that she is not other children, she is only herself, and that manners is not your first priority because you honestly don't feel she has the motor skills necessary to not make a mess yet. Tell him that dinner should be a low-stress event, to help her master her skills right now, and that you will teach her manners when you feel she's got the basics perfect!!
2007-01-28 14:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by Cyndi Storm 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My boys are 2 1/2 and 4 and they still make a mess, we have tried to teach them...but they just make a mess. She will get better with time, for god sakes, shes only 1 1/2.
2007-01-28 19:42:08 · answer #5 · answered by HarleeNicole 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, sounds like he is a neat freak. I have a suggestion for him, though. If I were him and know so much about teaching an 18 month old baby how to use a napkin, tell him to knock himself out- he can teach the baby some manners.
Daddy needs to get a grip.
2007-01-28 14:47:23 · answer #6 · answered by rosey 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is being very unreasonable. My 3 year old still makes a mess sometimes. Getting neater with eating comes with age and practice. If your husband doesn't like it, tough!! Tell him if he thinks he can do a better job at it, then he can do it. Good luck!! Your child is very normal.
2007-01-29 03:06:08 · answer #7 · answered by HK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 15 month old is messy when she eats. You are right that they do need to get the hang of it. One of the best ways to help toddlers learn table manners is to set a good example yourself. Toddlers love to imitate Mommy and Daddy. But it still takes time and a lot of patience. Meanwhile, get a mat to put under your toddler's high chair, to help keep the food off the floor. (you can get them at Babies R Us).
2007-01-28 14:43:53 · answer #8 · answered by Erika 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are correct on this one. Babies that young are just learning how to pick things up, and put them in their mouths, without having to worry about using a spoon properly, and keeping a napkin on their lap! I gave my kids child sized silverware at that age, but they didn't always use it. We also used bibs, and made sure the high-chair was not on carpet. If you model good table manners, she will start picking up on it, but she's still so young. It's more important that she learn to feed herself, than have you spoon every bite into her mouth to avoid a mess. You're doing fine!
2007-01-28 14:48:12 · answer #9 · answered by Tiss 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not...why else would they sell splash mats specifically for this purpose. I can't even get my husband to be neat, what chance do I have with a toddler!
Babies make messes, that's what they do. Tell you husband to stop blaming you - you are doing a great job.
2007-01-28 15:21:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋