I'm a single mother to a two year old. My husband walked out on us about 8 months ago and we're now going through a divorce. I work 40 hours a week to support my daughter and get her the things that she needs. I've worked so hard that i'm about to get promoted. When i'm not working, i'm at home with my daughter taking care of her and doing things with her while trying to unwind from the day myself. I'm really confused because someone has insinuated that i'm a negligent mother. Does working as much as I do make me a negligent mother?
2007-01-28 13:27:10 · 37 answers · asked by ♫Joshua's~♥~Girl♫ 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
not at all. you are working to support and to provide for your child. this is very respectful. you wouldn't believe how many parents that do not provide for thier kids. do not feel bad you are doing the right thing. don't let anyone tell you differently. you are doing everything that you can to raise your kid. they should be praising you not degrading you. don't listen to them because you know what? they would do the exact same thing as you if they were any kind of a parent. give yourself a pat on the back. continue to do the great job that you are doing. don't worry about what others think. as long as you are providing for your child, love your child and are being the best mom that you can be then that is all that matters. hope this helps you out. you are a great person. good luck in the future.
2007-01-28 13:37:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think and know that it does not make you a negligent mother. That person does not know how hard you work to get the money that your child needs. If you didn't work, you guys would be on the street, and that would make you negligent. Working a lot makes you a caring, supportive mother who will not let her child die in hunger. When you come home, you are with her all the time. How does that make you negligent? Tell that someone to put their body in your shoes and try working almost 24/7 to support a 2 year old alone. Being honest, I admire you for working a lot and not giving up on your daughter. May god bless you and help make your daughter and your life better.
2007-01-28 13:38:01 · answer #2 · answered by GT Star_Gyal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oprah had a show about this about a week ago. No you are not a negligent mother. It is up to the parents to decide which is right for them. No one should judge you for working just because they are a stay at home mom. I currently am a stay at home mom but once my child is over a year old i plan to find a job so that I can provide for my family and give her the things that I never had in my childhood. Do what you feel is best for you and the welfare of your children.
2007-01-28 16:40:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, the fact that you're working 40 hours a week and spending all your free time with her makes you a WONDERFUL mother. The fact that you're even asking this question indicates that you're not neglecting her - if you were, you wouldn't care.
Sounds like if the situation were different, you would want to take care of her full time.
I firmly believe that children do better when raised by their parents, not day care centers. BUT, I am also a working mom out of financial necessity. Would I be a better mom if I sat home and collected welfare, teaching my children that you don't have to work to support yourself? No way. You are teaching your daughter (or will be, she's still a little young to get this) to be a responsible person, to do what needs to be done to take care of herself and her family.
You are doing what you need to do to survive. Whoever told you that you're neglecting her needs their head examined.
2007-01-28 13:35:48 · answer #4 · answered by ~StepfordWife~ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. You're a mother doing what she can in a less than ideal situation. I'm all for a mother staying home if she can. I believe children are best off if raised at home. However, I'm not fool enough to believe that everyone can do that. There are all kinds of situations. People do what they can. When I worked as an infant care manager I had a ton of respect for some the young, teen moms who left their children in our care. These were girls who found themselves in a situation and just needed help. They didn't PLAN to get pregnant. They were doing their best to pick themselves up and to make a life for their children. They couldn't do it alone. However, we also had very well to do moms who decided to work even when they didn't have to. I found it interesting that many of their children were in our care from 6-6 and then left with a nanny on the weekends. Why? These women had a choice and were making a poor one. I also noted that the young and poorer mothers were the ones who ALWAYS stopped in to visit their children on their lunch breaks or between college classes. Or they'd show up early if class got out early so they could spend more of the day with their kids. These were women who wanted to be with their kids but couldn't. The rich *itches were the ones who'd get a day off work and still put their kids in daycare so they could spend the day shopping with friends.
Anyway, that is my take on it. Of course a child is better off at home but that isn't always realistic. You didn't plan for your husband to walk out. So, you're doing what you have to do.
2007-01-28 17:45:47 · answer #5 · answered by Amelia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, not at all. You are just trying to be a good mum and support your daughter to get her the things that she needs and you also still try to spend time with her. If you were a negligent mother you wouldn't be doing the things that you do for her and be working so hard to provide for her. I hope things get better for you guys. Don't let people get to you. You are doign what you think is best for you and your daughter.
2007-01-28 13:40:36 · answer #6 · answered by Andy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your asking the wrong question on here. A big majority of the stay-at-home women who answer these questions will agree. Yes you are.
However, I have been a stay at home mom for about 14 months. (I had to quit working when put on bed at around 6 months pg, my son is 11 months now.) I don't agree, I think that you are doing the best you can with what you are given. Yes, you are having to miss out on somethings and your daughter is being watched by someone else, but if you are spending as much time with her. I say you are a great mom!
KEEP DOING A GREAT JOB!!!
Ash-Good Luck
2007-01-28 13:37:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not a negligent mother. Don't buy into the guilt! I'm sure you are doing the best you can. It's very difficult going through a divorce, being a single mom and supporting a family. Kudos to you for all you are doing!!
2007-01-28 13:36:31 · answer #8 · answered by Christie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, your not neglecting your daughter. I'm not a single mother but me and my husband both work 40 hours a week. My son is a happy little boy and we love the time we have together. You are doing what you have to do as a single mother and that is taking care of you and yours. As long as your child is happy you are doing what has to be done.
2007-01-28 14:06:56 · answer #9 · answered by tricksy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im wondering if that someone was either your soon to be ex-husband or some stay-at-home parent who doesnt know what its like to be a sole provider for your child. No you are doing what you have to do to provide for yourself and your child. Now i can see if you were working weekends as well and a lot of overtime but 40 hours a week is regular full time work and the way the economy is today we all need full time hours.
2007-01-28 13:35:49 · answer #10 · answered by miz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋