How do I prepare my child for her first day at school?

Question

My five and a half year old is very scared about starting school - what does she need to know in the playground and what advice can I give her to make this transition smoother?

And how do I cope with missing her all day?

Answer 1

It is time to get excited - not just her but you too!

First take her shopping. Buy a few pretty new outfits that are "special for school". And she gets to buy a backpack!! And a lunchkit!! New inside SHOES??? With the right attitude this can have a party like atmosphere and get things started on the right foot!

Then to prepare for the first day, she can make something special for her new teacher - a hello card, or something neat she can do by herself. This will give her something concrete to be excited about on the first day, and take her mind off being a little nervous/shy!

Now you can scout out a few best girlfriends for her. Even kindergarden kids travel in packs. With a few good friends with her on the first day, she will be thrilled to spend the day with them! Some principals can offer families that are in the school already - with older brothers/sisters, who have a little one starting school soon too. This new friend will "know things" and crush some of the nervousness!

You can also play school with her - 99% of schools have the same schedule [hello, circle time, craft time, recess, etc] so she has an idea of the routine.

And don't let her see you cry on the first day - just walk around the corner and go have lunch with all the parents you met finding friends for your daughter! If she cries, 5 minutes after you're gone she will stop... and remember, it is harder on the parent!

Answer 2

Let him know that you'll be there as soon as school finishes. Find out from the school who he is to go to if he has any problems. Make sure he has some cash, even if there isn't a tuck shop, it will make him feel better. If he's allowed a mobile, let him take it, and be available should he call. I hope you've already met his teacher. I'm not entirely sure of the system in Ireland as I am in England, but probably there is a uniform which he may not be used to. Let him know that all the kids wear it, so although it won't be high fashion, all the kids will be in the same boat. Most likely everyone will think he's cool coming from America. Involve yourself with the PTA or any other organizations. Do get in touch with organizations that can help you, because your quite young, although I don't doubt you're doing a great job, we all can do with a helping hand sometimes. I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you all the very best. Be interested in his day and his work and give a hand where you can and don't be worried about asking for a little extra help with anything he's having difficulty with.

Answer 3

I told my daughter everything that might happen Bad or good . So that she would continue to trust my word. You can't paint some wonderful picture just to get them out the house without a fight.
We role played when I told her about couple of bad things and what she should do or say. I told her all the good things I remembered and reminded her that she would be coming back soon. There are wonderful books at the library , try those ! Please visit the school and show her where the bathroom is in the classroom and you may be lucky and see the teacher getting ready ( We were ) . As for you Keep busy or you might find yourself waiting in the parking lot. Save some house work for that day .or Try to go out with a friend and have some fun. Good luck!

Answer 4

Talk to her about school and let her know what to expect so she won't be surprised. Tell her they will do fun art, play with friends on the playground, sing songs, and read great stories. Go to your library and check out some children's books about school or some nonfiction books about characters in school. Read these together and talk about school a lot. If possible, take her to the school ahead of time and let her see where she will go, meet her teacher and see her room. Most teachers and schools are very willing to let you come and it makes the kids' transition so much easier. Good luck!

Answer 5

To prepare your child for kindergarten, I suggest getting books about children starting. There is an excellent book by Amy Schwartz called "Annabelle Swift Kindergartner" which addresses this subject. It's easy to understand and many children become eager to have the kind of adventure Annabelle has in the book. Read books like this to your child and through this shared experience, you will both lessen the anxiety of this milestone.

The playground can be a jungle for a child who is not use to playing with other children in an open setting like a park. Try to network with other children from the neighborhood who will be in her class. If you are unable to do this, talk to the teacher or classroom aide regarding your concerns. They can help your child socialize. Tell your child to find children who likes what she likes (i.e. jump rope) and play with them during playtime.

This time is also traumatic for parents. I suggest having your day planned with things to do to keep you busy. Run errands, have lunch with a friend, go window shopping, get your hair done, etc.. By the time your daughter is ready to come home, the day would have flown by.

A word of caution: In my years of teaching, I have seen parents linger too long once they have dropped their children off at school. This lingering causes problems for the child, the teacher, and the other children. If your child is crying, she will continue to do so to keep you with her. If you linger and the other children who may be missing their parents see you, they will start asking for their parents. Lingering causes the teacher to spend time accomodating you and your child and less time getting the students acclimated to school. Fifteen minutes is a good time limit. Anything beyond that makes it harder on both of you.

Enjoy this milestone! A link to the book I mentioned is attached to this response.

Answer 6

It was horrilbe for my 5 year old and nothing I said or did made it better. She cried and cried.. and after the first week she was ok after making some friends. Its very scary for them.. but for some reason my oldest who is 9 went to Kindergarden and didnt want anything to do with me or her dad that day. So I think some kids will react different once they get to school. You can tell her of all the fun activities they will get to do.. some fun field trips they might take. It helps to go to the school with her and show her around and meet her teacher before she actually goes. Give her a tour of the school.. where the library is.. cafeteria.. and so on. This will help her get aquainted with the school. Good Luck .. its never easy :)

Answer 7

Possibly your own separation anxiety is the parental concern here?

Take her to the school to 'visit' the school as a walk-through with someone fromt the office as the escort. She could see how the school operates in classrooms and on the playground.

As for you, lady friend, take a deep breath on the first day of school, help her out of the car, [you may or may not be allowed to walk her into the building] and tell her to have a nice day and you will see her later. A nice kiss on the cheek and "I love you, do your best." never hurts.

No tears. No pausing. Turn and leave her in the company of caring teachers and lots of new friendships soon to be made.

Answer 8

Dont make a big deal of the first day.Make sure she has one of her friends over before school starts so she keeps in contact.Just the normal things.If she hurts herself and is being bullied to tell the teacher.IOther kids are probably feeling scared about school.The best of luck.Remind her that you will be there to pick her up at the end of the day.I saw your added detail.Volunteer at the school.Sometimes the teacher requests help with activiies in the classroom or the canteen if you have one.

Answer 9

This is a very scary time for kids. I think that if you reassure her and try not to show any apprehension in yourself to her it would be helpful. Kids tend to be more apprehensive if they sense their parents are too. On the playground she should just find a friend to have fun with. Tell her all kids are nervous their first day too and some might act out in different ways. Tell her no matter what to be herself and to be friendly. Tell her there is nothing wrong with being scared. ANd if she misses you at all or is sad and wants to go home, what you could do is trace your hand on a piece of paper. (pretty paper) have her decorate it, write something sweet on it and let her know what it says. I did this for my daughter, I wrote : Mommy Loves you! She can bring it with her, keep it in her desk/bag/ wherever she has easy access, and when she gets lonely she can take "your hand" out and know that you will be with her very soon waiting for her and the message will reassure her that she is loved.

Answer 10

First day of school is some how anxietly for some of the cildren . I my self cry alot on that day.
training a child to be social help alot solve this problem. any way, you should speak with her alot about the kind teachers, and any part of school and... and say haw good they are.
she must have a smartly dress and chic form to get self confidence between childrens.this is the most important thing. just remember that make every thing well as you can for your little doughter! Good Luck!