Ok, I went to lunch today with my X girlfriend. We have not seen each other in almost two months. Long story short, we dated 3 years, broke up for 2, but never really stopped seeing each other. I am madly in love with her, and she claims to be in love with me. She is dating someone now, but I told her I want to work things out. Now today when we saw each other, it was crazy. I told her how i felt, and what I was thinking, and she pretty much feels the same way i can tell. When we left the restarant I go to give her a hug, and she latched on for like 10 minutes. Then she said she wanted to come over, but she could not, cause it was not right for her to do that, even though she wanted to. She drove me to my car and we ended up parking and making out for like 15 minutes. My question is, at this point, should I persue her or should i sit back and wait and see what happens.. i can tell she really wants to be together, but i dont know what to do right now....
2007-01-28 08:26:27 · 34 answers · asked by ucfmanic 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell her to blow you, if she doesnt then shes not the one.
2007-01-28 08:30:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would definitely sit back and wait to see what happens for several reasons. If she is on the fence about whether she wants to get back together with you or stay with her current guy, and pursue her too much you might push her away or seem desperate. Also, you don't want to condone her cheating on her current boyfriend because that says that you think that sort of behavior is okay, not a message you want to send to someone who you might be in a relationship with in the future. By letting her know that she needs to leave her boyfriend first before you two can pursue anything it shows that you have integrity, and that must be something that your girlfriend values if she said that she doesn't want to do anything that "wasn't right" (such as going back to your house) while she is with her current boyfriend. I would just be patient and let her know that you're there for her as a friend right now, but nothing more until she is free to date. If you really love her, she should be worth waiting for.
2007-01-28 08:35:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This sounds like the Better Ex-Dilemma: www.TheBetterExBoyfriend.com
Why did she break up with you if were who she wanted to be with? What's different now in her? What's different now with you? How will this time around be different? Do you really want to be the other man?
Don't show how insecure you are by pursuing someone who dumped you. She needs to step up and come to you when she's single and show you that she's different and that you two won't be doing some break-up to make-up cycle that is no good for anyone. Love schmove! Sounds like you two are too scared to move on to better things.
Best,
Feather Ives
Author and Publisher
www.TheBetterEx-Boyfriend.com
2007-01-28 08:35:14 · answer #3 · answered by featherives 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Take the high road. Wait for her to decide what she really wants. If she really wants to be with you, then she will break up with the other guy. Pursuing her may cause her to feel pressured and that's not a good thing. You obviously let her know how you feel and now the ball is in her court. Be patient and if it's meant to be, it'll happen.
2007-01-28 08:31:02 · answer #4 · answered by Thia R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would actually wait and let her break things off or whatever with her current boyfriend. If she does that, then she might be serious about you two getting together. Wait to pursue her until she breaks up with him. You don't want to get caught in the middle of something like that.
Next time she calls or whatever to ask you out ask her then if she's still dating the other guy. If she is tell her you can't go out with her. She'll get the hint, and then you'll be able to tell if she's serious about you or not.
I really hope things work out for you!
2007-01-28 08:33:56 · answer #5 · answered by gigagiggle 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
okay..so im in the same boat you are in and i can tell you from experience you will regret it if you dont pursue it..dont worry about the other guy if she loves you then it'll find a way to work out...if she isn't serious you'll find out really fast because she wont give up on the other guy...stay true to your feelings and go with what you feel is right...you two sound like you want each other very badly..i hope everything works out for you!
2007-01-28 08:31:14 · answer #6 · answered by Elyssa S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No more kissing, no more long squeezy hugging, and keep any sort of romantic talk to a minimum. It's ok to do lunches and stay friendly, but nothing more until you are both unattached once again.
I'd hate to think she is only stringing you along, "just in case" something happens between her and her current b/f. She has to make up her mind, and you have to not be so 'easy' when she calls.
2007-01-28 08:40:16 · answer #7 · answered by sandyblondegirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she truely loved you she would not be with this other guy.You should not have anything to do with her until she is completely done with this other guy.Sound's to me like she is a cheater obviously she is if she kissed you and she is still seeing this other guy.Why would you want to be with someone like that she is only going to turn around and cheat on you.Don't you think that you deserve better.She is your ex for a reason I suggest you leave it that way and move on.All she is doing is playing games with you & your emotions.If you want to be played like a piano then keep seeing her you will be the one out of tune in the end.Sorry but it is true.
2007-01-28 08:58:00 · answer #8 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should think you deserve better then to just wait around for some girl to eventually make a decision about wanting to be with you. Make her make up her mind now before you let it drag on for months. If she feels the way you think she does, she'll pick you and you two can move on and rebuild your relationship.
2007-01-28 08:32:46 · answer #9 · answered by CandyAppleRed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not do anything with her because she is not available. Wait until she breaks up with the other guy unless you want to face his wrath when he finds out. Chances are he probably knows that she is still seeing you and knows that you are the ex as well, not just a friend. If she truly wants to be with you, she will leave the other guy she is with.
2007-01-28 08:31:27 · answer #10 · answered by SuzyBelle04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont pressure her. Give her some space and time to think about what she really wants. She will let you know when she's ready.
Personally I dont think its a good idea to get back with ex's, if things didnt work first time around what has changed this time?
Good luck though!
2007-01-28 08:37:03 · answer #11 · answered by LittleOleMe 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋