I am broke and can't afford to give money at my friend's wedding. I live in New York and people always give money at weddings. My friend knows I'm broke and said she wants me to come to the wedding even if I don't give anything, but I want to give SOMETHING.
2007-01-28 06:50:41 · 29 answers · asked by MeMe 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I understand completely! I am from NYC and you are always expected to give a zillion dollars!
Look, your friend really wants you there and from experience, your presence there can be a gift all in itselfBut bring a little something, whatever you can afford.
A great idea is to go to a Marshall's or Ross and get a beautiful crystal picture frame. It will be perfect for their wedding picture and looks expensive without being expensive! You can get one for under $10!!
From someone who understands! Best of luck!
2007-01-28 07:53:42 · answer #1 · answered by TheAnswerChicks 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I received alot of money when I was married and I also received a lot of gifts. Years later I cannot tell you who gave me money, but I can look at an item that was a wedding gift and I can usually remember who gave it to me. Money is great, but it is gone in a flash. Surely you could afford a nice picture frame or photo album? One of our favorite gifts was an ice cream maker, but then we live in the South where it's hot. How about a board game or some crystal wine glasses. I found a set of four for $12.00 at TJ Maxx. If you really really can't afford anything, go to the wedding anyway. Chances are you're friend will not remember that you didn't bring a gift. Ohh yeah...here's an idea...offer to help at the wedding/ reception. Brides are always needing something/someone at the last minute! Let this be your gift.
2007-01-28 08:06:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh, my goodness, do these people have it backwards! They have really misinformed you, it seems.
It is actually BETTER etiquette to give a tangible gift than it is to give a money gift.
However, you should NEVER bring the gift to the wedding and reception itself. You need to either ship it (or drop it off yourself) to the home of the bride and/or groom, either before or shortly after the wedding. Taking gifts to the reception itself is burdensome for their families-- they have to pack it all up afterwards-- and also is a security nightmare (things are often stolen by hotel staff, etc).
Furthermore, since this person is a friend of yours, money would actually be an INAPPROPRIATE gift! Money gifts are something the older generation gives the younger, not something you should be gifting to a peer.
You should also be aware that wedding gifts are never mandatory. It is your choice whether you want to give a small gift or a small money gift, but either way it does not belong at the wedding itself. And that's not just me talking, that's etiquette authorities like Miss Manners!
Another appropriate idea is to wait until your financial situation is better and give them a first anniversary gift.
2007-01-28 11:49:41 · answer #3 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Gifts are NOT required when going to a wedding. I don't care who told you that they were.
If you don't have the money that is fine. If you are dead set on giving a gift, get a card and put $5 in it. Then write your most sincere best wishes in the card. Remember in all gifts, no matter the reason given, it is the thought that counts.
2007-01-28 09:36:09 · answer #4 · answered by Poppet 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is more than acceptable to give a gift rather than money. I think your friend just wants you to be there, gift or no gift. The whole point of the day isn't the gifts it's about your friend and her fiance getting married and being together. I got married 7 years ago and I'm hard pressed to remember everything we received as gifts. I do remember all my friends and family having a great time that day. It was one of the most fantastic days of my life. That's what's important. Go and have a great time.
2007-01-28 07:00:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Can you afford to buy yourself a dinner and a drink? If so then whatever amount you spend on yourself eating out is fine to put into an envelope, 10 -15$ is ok, don't be embarrassed, your friend knows your situation and just wants you there to share in her joy. I personally never give presents that have to be looked after and taken home by someone at the reception afterwords, they have enough to do at their reception without worrying about making sure they haven't left a box or dropped a note on top of the gift when transporting, I think its rude to put this extra task on them. I say a card is great even if you cannot afford anything at this time, put a little note inside stating that you would like to take them out to eat when it will be good for all of you. Don't worry about it, go and have fun with your friends.
2007-01-28 08:36:45 · answer #6 · answered by MiMi 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It is perfectally fine to give a gift! I got only 4 gifts at mine, people really only give gifts at showers anymore. But, find out where she is registered and get her something off of there! I enjoyed the few gifts I got because they were what I wanted!
2007-01-28 09:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by jacksonblonde 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wedding ceremony travelers are offended and insulted while a Bride and Groom placed that kind of concepts on a marriage invitation, that's beside the point and would not belong there. evaluate a "honeymoon" registry that's similiar to a contemporary registry or present checklist. Have your mum and dad and wedding ceremony party contributors bypass that concepts "by utilising observe of mouth" to the invited travelers. responded by utilising: a licensed wedding ceremony professional / a expert bridal representative / a marriage ceremony officiant
2016-11-01 12:42:52 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it is alright to give a gift! In most of the United States that is what people do. I think it is an ethnic thing to give money. You could even give a gift of yourself as a certificate to do the dishes after a party, or paint something. These are really appreciated.
2007-01-28 08:01:15 · answer #9 · answered by emass6 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is certainly appropriate to give a wedding gift other than money.
2007-01-28 06:58:26 · answer #10 · answered by lynda_is 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋