i have a boyfirend who is not treating me right and i want to leave him, but i a have a child also, and i just can't imgine leaving her, cause i love her dearly, and i feel that she has the right to be with her father so i don't want to take her away from him, but i feel that i need to leave. anyway a new love has also arrived and i am not sure ,what should i do?
2007-01-28 05:10:44 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
always give enough respect to current business before you venture into new waters,...
take your child, or you will always regret that move,...
let him pay for his indiscretions, child support is a real thing.
2007-01-28 05:15:53 · answer #1 · answered by iroc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
New love should not be a factor in your decision to leave. You could be having a 'grass is greener' moment (and it's not always greener but sometimes looks that way thru those rose colored glasses we sometimes wear when in a bad relationship). If he isn't treating you right then can it be helped by counseling? If he is hurting you then get out, get safe, and get help. Sometimes maybe it's better for a child to be raised by 2 happy parents that may not be together than by 2 miserable, fighting parents that are together but in an unhealthy relationship. You should focus and the health and happiness of you and your child because it doesn't sound like he is.
2007-01-28 13:29:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what you mean when you say that your current boyfriend is treating you badly. If he is physically abusing you, get out now.
Obviously, you are not happy. If you truly feel that you can not work things out, you should leave and like millions of others, make a fair arrangement for your child to visit her father and move on with your life. It would be worse for you to keep her in an unhappy home.
Before you do, however, please take the time to examine your heart. See if your feeling that he is treating you badly is really just your trying to make excuses, so you can be free to party.
Once you leave a good spouse/soulmate, you will probibly never get them back. Conversely, a bad spouse never seems to go away.
No-one can tell you what to do but, please keep the well-being of your child as your first priority.
2007-01-28 13:29:40 · answer #3 · answered by player9900 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should consider keeping your daughter with you. You can arrange for visitation with her father. Your daughter needs you... unless you really don't want the responsibility of caring for her, in which case she would probably be better off with her father, but you may have a very difficult time getting her back when you finally come to your senses. Whatever your decision concerning your daughter, you should spend some time to yourself, at least a few weeks or even months, not intimately involved with any man, to reflect on your decisions, learn your lessons, and figure out what really is best for you. This other guy is only a distraction for you and this sort of distraction will keep you from learning your lessons and figuring out what is best for you.
2007-01-28 13:23:54 · answer #4 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he doesnt treat you right... LEAVE HIM. your kid is the most important thing in your life. you dont want them to be in a hostile living environment. and just because you leave him. it doesnt mean he is going to get your kid. hes your bf, not your husband. he has visitation rights.. yes.... but you are the mother. because you two arent married... there are different rules then if you were
plus.. i wouldnt go for the new love just yet. leave your current bf first... adjust to that and then possible start seeing the new guy. dont go from one love to another just like that. then he might want partial custody of your baby and u need to get full custody.
just think whats best for your child....
good luck
2007-01-28 13:19:22 · answer #5 · answered by marine's girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the child and leave..allow him ample visitation but let him know he cant treat you poorly. Make sure you have no feelings for him b4 moving on to the next one. its gonna be confusiong enough for the baby. Never just up and leave your child behind thats poor parenting.
2007-01-28 13:14:39 · answer #6 · answered by Amy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids dont need parents who dont get along. My parents never got along and I didnt live with them for most of my life. It bothered me that they didnt get along but were still together honestly, they both are or were unhappy. As long as you guys can get along on a mutual basis for the child then its better off that way. Neither one of you should bad mouth the other in front of the child. Just be nice to each other around each other for the kids sake.
2007-01-28 13:17:41 · answer #7 · answered by G-BOY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen, i was with my son's father on and off for five years.. it was rocky and hard, finally i told him it was really over and that i was leaving.. i took my son and i moved away.. now if he wants to be apart of his life then by all means come on and take care , if not then ur leaving his raising to the man i fall in love with and who loves my son... in ur case, go for the new love and by all means take ur child.. if he wants to be apart of his life let him, and if not then by all means let ur new love help.. don't let ur happiness be affected by misery just because u have a child together.. Happiness is where ur heart is and that's with ur daughter always.. don't leave her cause in the long run she will never forgive u for it.. cause she will look at it as u left her for another man.. love and take her with u.. she will understand that better than u leaving her..
2007-01-28 13:19:24 · answer #8 · answered by gigglegirl913 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If hes not treating you right then you should try to sit down and talk it out as you have a child aswell to think of....but if he still does not change then i think its best to take time off from your relationship cuz if youre not happy then whats the point....try dating other people and take time off from your relationship...it will help you analyze your relationship better
2007-01-28 13:15:29 · answer #9 · answered by devilz advocate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if hes not treating you right you should move on... There are plenty of guys who will treat you right!... As for the little one you can still be a loving mother to her!!! You just have to love yourself first!!!
for the new love just be honest with them
2007-01-28 13:17:29 · answer #10 · answered by SARAH D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can leave him and he can have visitation. when my paretns got divorced i only got to see my dad once every 2 weeks.. and if a new love came then go for him... leave the boyfriend that isnt treating you like you should be treated
2007-01-28 13:17:53 · answer #11 · answered by Dont get Infected 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋