What is it with all these 55 year old guys who still want to play the field?

Question

As a 40 year woman I have stopped looking for men in their 40's because they all seem to be players but now I am shocked at the men in their upper 50's who are not ready for marriage or committment. Do these guys actually think they are going to be able to get women forever? These men are not famous or celebrities so their looks are going to fade and they are going to fact health and issues and sexual function issues in the near future (viagra and all that other stuff isn't suitable for alot of men with other health problems) so why don't they find one one to settle down with to love them so that they can enjoy a future of love and happiness and committment, even when health fails and things happen rather than believe that they are always going to be chick magnets? I know if I was married to a man I would stay with him through everything but I certainly would not chose a man with a bunch of issues to date. What is with these men?

Answer 1

Maybe they want to play the field for the sense of freedom they have after having been tied to one woman for a long time. Their feelings may change after they've been alone for a while and find out just how hard it is to find someone to love them; and they may wind up feeling just as rejected as you seem to feel now.

(P.S. Aren't you 41? I thought you had a birthday last November. Tsk, tsk, you fibber! lol)

Answer 2

Most were married for a long time or were never able to commit over the years. Either way they never learned or have forgotten any depth. It's kind of like little boys with some financial stabilty. I've seen some of the guys that my mother has dated and it is so true. They seem to really have no care of finding someone to be with them........ just having fun and playing the game. It's hard enough at any age to find someone that one can truly love.

40s seem to be all players? I'm 43. Yes many guys in their 40s are players. Still time to play and now a bit more financially secure. They say 40s are the new 20s with people living longer. But whatever the age putting guys in a box is simply wrong.

I for one am told I am a decent looking guy. But I have tired of women out there who just want to date lots of different guys so they can check off their "shopping list" to find the right one. Often on a date this is readily apparent. It is the differences and learning to explore them with a partner that is the best thing in the world.

I'm thinking you need to be looking elsewhere than you have. And you are only 40 so just get out there and have fun. Eventually you will find that guy who will love you and appreciate what is most important regardless of anything....... that someone loves them.

Answer 3

Well ReallyFedUp I am a male in my early fifties and can relate to what you are saying. I know a lot of guys that are in their later 50's who think they are gods gift to women and drive these really hot penises (sorry I meant to say cars) and somehow believe that they are in their 20's again. The majority of these guys that I know have been married for long periods of time and are now either separated or divorced. I'm certain that they are going to the bars for one reason and one reason only and that is not to get drunk but to find a younger woman to help boost their ego. One of my best friends is actually in a relationship with a woman that is his daughters age. He is 57 years old and he is seeing a woman that is 32. She is a widow and he was very good friends with her husband. The husband passed away and he was trying to befriend the wife and give her some support right after his death. But within 3 weeks of his death he was being sexually active with this woman. He is a professional and she is a very uneducated and immature woman. I tried as hard as I could to tell him that I thought that he was making a poor choice but he would not listen to me at all and said he didn't care what people thought he was getting lots of lovin and that was all he wanted at present. Now he has been seeing this woman for over a year and he is just still wanting a friend with benefits kind of relationship, she is starting to talk about a future with him. He gets angry and says I am just jealous because my woman is 49 and he has such a younger woman. And it is not his first he has seen about 4 others which all ended horribly. But some people just don't learn from their mistakes. Sorry for wondering off topic. I am sure that there are a lot of men who are sincere and want to settle down with a mature woman and perhaps if you were to join a group of people who have similar interests as you (ie: scrap booking, sports organization, etc.) you may meet one. Or if you were to become a volunteer somewhere you may also meet someone there. Do not lose your faith in the male species as some of us are truly looking for a real woman that is more suitable to our lifestyles. And it is sad that so many make the rest of us look like fools. As you are also probably aware some guys are going through their male menopause (again not trying to rationalize their behaviour) and live as if they were 25 again and go out and purchase a penis to drive and/or act like they have some type of trophy on their arm by seeing someone much younger then themselves. Sorry for rambling so long also. But best of luck in finding a real man that you can build a relationship with and one that will treat you as a princess and with respect.

Answer 4

I can do the same stuff and im going into freshman year. I'm 14 years old and I have the same height and weight as u. I think you should play runningback if ur fast. If u think you could get past a 300 pound linesman then ok try playing linebacker but remember you play the position that the coach tells you to play in the end

Answer 5

These older men, seem to feel the need to be the cock of the walk. To prove that they are virile,sexy and pitch a tent every night. Getting a younger woman to notice them, and sleep with them is their ultimate high. After all, THEN they must be HOT STUFF. Dreamers is what I say. You are right, alot of that going on these days. I am happy to be single and do as I please. Don't have to cook breakfast, or wash socks either.

Answer 6

I'm 34 and my boyfriend is 58.

So if they can't find younger women, they will find younger guys. He was married to a woman for most of her life and she was a b&tch so know he's with me. It's alot easier not dealing with women and women's expectations and all their nagging and drama. Guys just take it day by day and we have more in common and like to hang out.

So again, if they can't find younger women, they will find younger guys.

Sorry.

Guess you should stop your whining.

Answer 7

The problem with these men is simply the following:
They are really 16 year old boys trapped in adult male bodies. Its sad but true. Also, if women don't see this early ... they will actaully get involved with these men :O

Answer 8

I know what you mean! It's like my supervisor at work - he's 56 and married and always has a young woman dating on the side. He likes to throw out the duckies if you know what I mean. I think that it makes them feel younger when in actuality, it makes them look like that woman's father! LoL!

Answer 9

I am 45 and currently dating a 56yr old gentleman. He is a GEM of a man and not arrogant in any way. He is repectful of me and alot of fun. We met on a "dating" site.....and I say more power to him and other gentleman his age who are out dating and enjoying themselves......what is the big deal and I question why you are being so judgemental?

Answer 10

I think they are chasing eternal youth. They cannot get to grips with their own mortality. In my experience, women tend to be more realistic about aging so we have a hard time understanding this kind of behaviour. Also, I think it is because men and women are so different.