At what age and how do I make my only child sleep in a separate room.?

Question

My son age 5 cannot sleep alone at night?He sleeps with us on our bed. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

Children should have their own rooms and beds from the day they are born.Your child is 5 and till now he has been sleeping with you.Of course he isn't able to sleep alone.You shouldn't expect him to be able to.The soonest you make him sleep in his own room and bed,the better the results will be.If he has his own room and a bed,explain him that he is old enough to sleep in his room as big boys do.When he is going to bed,stay long with him,read a tale,talk for a while,let him drink a cup of water.After that say "good night" and leave the room.At first,let his door to be open,so he can hear your voice if he calls you.Let him some light in the room if he needs it.Tell him before he falls asleep he can think about something and imagine something he likes.After all he will try how real are the new rules and if you are not sure about your decision,he will understand it really fast and will make you feel sorry for him and get him back in your bed.If you are sure he needs to sleep in a separate room,he will feel your decision and will get used to it easily.If he comes to your bed after you have put him in his bed,stand up and without saying anything,return him to his bed.Repeat that as long as needed.Finally he will get it that you are sure and he has to be in his own room.I know a mother who had the same problem with her 4-year-old daughter.The first night she made the girl sleep in her bed,the girl got up and came to her mother's bed 24 times!Her mother only stood up and returned her without saying anything.The next night the girl stood up 12 times.The 3rd night - 2 times.Since the 4th night,the girl knew her mother is serious and willingly went to her bed without problems.

Answer 2

I have to ask why a 5 year old is still sleeping in your room in the first place? They should be in their own room from the time they no longer need night feeding. Although its possible to get him to sleep alone now, you've made a lot of trouble for yourself. Get him a nice night light and let him choose the rooms theme/decor. If he comes out in the night to sleep with you keep taking him back till he gets the message.

Answer 3

I have a 3 near 4 year old and he too would sleep in the middle of us because a- he would sleep all night b- because it was easier to just get him out his cot and put him next to us when you have to be up at 6 to get ready for work. so all these people that say oh i had my in his own bed from being 2 months good for you!!!!!

Anyway how i have got my son to now sleep in his room was we brought him some new bits for his room told him that this was his big boy bedroom and got him a CD player for his room and brought some bed time story for him to listen to he falls sleep listening to them, he has a bath at seven then CD asleep by 8.
He still sometimes gets in our bed about 5 ish but we are fine with that when he does come in he just gets in bed no chatting and goes back to sleep. it hasn't been easy there have been a few tears and upset but its soooooo worth it for your own bed back.
Good luck

Answer 4

firstly hun i would get a night light. Or have you ever seen those little stars that glow in the dark you put them on the ceiling.I would put him in his bed and lie with him till he falls asleep for a while. Think you need to try make bedtime fun read him a story and if you get the stars i think that would be great. Use his favourite hero figure he is into at the moment, tell him they are watchin over him and protecting him aswell as your bedroom being close by so nothing can happen to him just basically reassure him that he will be fine.This could take a while for him to get used to but in the long run its best for you. As the older he is getting the harder it will be. Hope this is some good to you and i wish you all the best.Goodluck.x

Answer 5

It isnt going to be that hard, my kids are 6 & 4 and still sleep with me most nights. Its comforting for them, they feel safe and protected.
When you want him to sleep in his own bed, explain that he has to sleep in his own room now cause he is a big boy. Go shopping and buy a speacial light, I bought my daughter a speacial soft toy to sleep with so it would protect her. Then create a bedtime routine. Bath, play, story time(while he is laying in bed), You can either leave him to fall asleep by himself or the first few nights stay with him until he falls asleep. Then after a few nights after story time move a few feet away from the bed as he falls asleep. This way he knows your still there but not in physical contact. If he gets up just put him back in bed. Then each night get further and further away until you are outside the door.
It works really well. I though my kids would go ballistic, but they didnt. The first night they cried for about an hour, second about half an hour and the third 15 minutes.
I didnt sit with them, I sat outside the door singing lullabies.

Hope this works for you.

Answer 6

You are just gonna have to be firm. If its normal to go straight into your bed at bedtime, then just refuse to let him, and NEVER give in. I know it sounds really harsh, but when he gets to the age when he is inviting his friends for sleepovers, how do you think it will make him feel to be bullied for being a mummys/daddys boy?
It will take a while for him to get the message, it could be a terrible time for you with less sleep for a few weeks, but he needs to get used to it, coz what will happen if you ever decide to have another baby? U cant let it go on any longer!! How about your sex life??? It must be non-existant!
Dont feel bad for wanting some mummy and daddy time, he is your child and you are his parents, therefore you need to show him who is boss.
Make sure the both of you support each other and agree to try not to kill each other when the tiredness gets to you. It wont last forever!

GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 7

We put our daughter in a separate room at 6 months. I thought that she wasn't ready to be in her room but later I realized that I wasn't ready to separate her from myself for the night. So, since she sleeps in her own room and baby monitors became my best friends. I heard how some people separate there older kids. They shop with the kid for a bed he will love and will be happy to sleep by himself. My 3 year old niece in low sleeps in a tent and she loves it. Try decorate your sons room in the way he wants and get a fun bed so his night time will become special and he will not want to sleep with mommy and daddy anymore. Good luck

Answer 8

Our girl was in her own room when she got too big for a moses basket (about 4 or 5 months i think) She is in her own room most of the time except when she has been ill.

Is there something in his room that upsets him? ie.room colour/decoration? try and make his room a place he is comfortable with.
You need to be firm with him.Tell him that big boys sleep in their own room etc.And if he gets into your bed, don't let him stay there, put him back in his own bed. You may have to do this many times but eventually, he will get the message.
Heap lots of praise on him when he does sleep all night in his own bed

Answer 9

If he has been sleeping in your room for 5 years,it is going to be hard getting him to sleep in his room. However,not impossible. Go slow, if you just stick him in his room and say stay, forget it, he will have a fit. Try explaining to him he is a big boy now, and big boys sleep in their big boys bed. Make it exciting. Let him pick out a new stuffed animal to sleep with. While my kids both sleep in their own rooms, they like to come out for everything (Water, a hug, they forgot to tell me something) I put 3 pennies outside their bedroom door. For every time they come out, they lose a penny, if they stay in their rooms without coming out, in the morning, they get to put the money in their bank. Lucky for me they love money and my son has only lost one penny so far. Whatever you do, don't put any gate in front of your door or his. He is likely to feel trapped. Not to mention a hazard if a fire or something happened. Not matter what though, whatever you start,make sure you stick to it, if you break down, it will not work and only make it harder to get him to sleep in his room. You can also invite a cousin or so sleep over (If there is one, or a close friend) Maybe he will see how fun it is in his room/bed if someone is there with him.

Answer 10

From our own personal experience with this situation. My son was sleeping in our bed since he was born. We weren't actively TRYING to make him sleep in his own bed...we just set it up....we let him play in his room whenever he wants. When bed time comes, we'll put in one of his favorite movies and stay with him until he falls asleep. We never put any kind of barrier inbetween our room and his...when he needs us or wants us...he can come right in. Eventually....he liked having his own space and doesn't like sleeping with us. Do what feels right to you AND to him. It will all work out in the end.