ok, i'm starting to wonder. My boyfriend and i have been going out for over a month now and we havent held hands or anything. I'm waiting on him. He says its becuase ,he's afraid i'll reject him, even though i told him i wouldnt. I think hes afraid of getting too close and being hurt. Becuase his last realtionship moved too fast for him and he was hurt in the end, so now hes moving really slow. And i really want to hold hands, or even a hug now and then would be nice. I really, really like him and i think the wait is worth it, but does anyone have an opinion on this?
2007-01-27 13:47:19 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
chill out. go at his speed. when he finally opens up, it'll be worth it. i guarantee.
2007-01-27 13:53:45 · answer #1 · answered by Food For Thought 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you have to understand why he is moving slow because of what happened with the last relationship. Although, you have nothing to do with that last relationship, he shouldn't compare you to the other chick. But, then, who's to say it won't end up the same? I think you should make the first move. Try holding his hand. Don't make a big deal of it. Just grab it and keep walking without making a fuss. Holding hands is not having sex. But, just keep it at that for awhile. When you see that he is cool with that, try something else. Maybe when you tell him goodnight a small kiss on the cheek. Little by little, that way he don't think you are just trying to get into his pants and then leave. Let him know you really like him and that is not only what you are after. Hopefully, he will see that and will come around and do things to you. I wouldn't wait on him. You take the first jump. I did with my husband. When he does do something to you, don't act surprised, respond.
2007-01-27 21:58:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should hold his hands or hug him if you really want to. that way he isnt the one getting rejected since he was afraid to. tell him that it your relationship is going WAY too slow. the first time me and my boyfriend held hands was..like in the middle of the one month. your waiting for him.. and i dont think he's worth that long wait to do things with him. just go for it. if you dont you wont ever kiss until like a year!
2007-01-27 21:59:17 · answer #3 · answered by xkathiee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do it urself. dont do anything to drastic like kiss him or anything but if u too are walking together then just grap him hand or somethiing and walk together. let him no that u want it because i think that he is mostly afraid to make a move even tho he wants to. wen u too are leaving to go warever just give him a casual hug. a hug or a hand hold wil not mess up a realationship. i promis u
2007-01-27 21:51:52 · answer #4 · answered by brunetteeegal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I don't think u r over reacting!
I think if u really like him and he really likes u the u should
tell him he wouln't be getting hurt and if he isn't ready for another gf then he shouldn't have started to go out with u! Because in the end it hurts u! I hope u guys get better soon!
Yo Gurl,
HomeGurl
2007-01-27 21:57:42 · answer #5 · answered by HomeGurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would Go lay a big KISS on him on the lips when he least expects it like maybe in the middle of a conversation and then say to him What do you think of that ..Make the first move who cares what anyone else thinks plus he will know you really dig him
2007-01-27 21:54:01 · answer #6 · answered by c d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should probably make the first move unless he specifically says that he wants to wait. If he has so much hesitation in the relationship, he may not be over his last one. A good talk about your relationship and what you want out of it should help.
Good luck.
2007-01-27 21:51:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple... if he's afraid to do it.. then you do it.. you start holding his hand...and you start hugging him.. that will kinda give the feeling for him which says that you you really really like him and definately wana continue this relationship regardless its fast or slow... soo..Good luck...hope it turns out well..;)
2007-01-27 21:56:34 · answer #8 · answered by Redweedplace ® 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
then hold his damn hand!
i don't understand the waiting. if he thinks your going to reject him - your not helping by not holding his hand. lead the way. show your trust.
for me, i need the permission that's it's ok to do those things. and he learned his lesson, he touched and it killed the relationship. so you lead the way.
what is it about girls and making the guy make all the first moves...?
2007-01-27 21:51:41 · answer #9 · answered by mike s 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow a month with no kisses, hugs, or holding hands!!! my bf kissed me the 1st day we went out.. u needa to talk to talk to him and tell him yall are movin too slow and that u might leave cuz yall are movin TOO SLOW!!!! tell him how u feel
2007-01-27 22:14:06 · answer #10 · answered by Pookie! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told him EVERYTHING? Maybe he doesn't know that you feel this way, and you need to sit down and talk to him. Or maybe u need to talk to his ex-girlfriend and see what went down. But, no you aren't overreacting. You shouldn't sit there and wish for something to happen You should go and try to make it happen.
2007-01-27 21:52:11 · answer #11 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋