I met his mother. We hold hands in public. I know his close friends and he knows mine, but he keeps saying he is not ready for a relationship, although we do everything that people in a relationship do. Whenever I need him he is there. We don't get intimate everytime we see eachother. I know it's not just physical. Any suggestions?
2007-01-27 13:29:13 · 8 answers · asked by AZ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You're letting him do all those things with no strings attached, why would he want to be in a committed relationship when he already gets what he needs now? I'm assuming when you say "you're not intimate EVERYTIME you see each other," you are meaning that you are intimate some of the time.
You should put the brakes on what you're doing if you guys aren't in a real relationship. If he won't commit, he's just using you and playing his role to get what he wants.
2007-01-27 13:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you should just take him at his word when he says he is not ready for a relationship.
Even though you two are doing the things that a couple in a committed relationship would do, it is not the same as two people who have actually verbally expressed their love and commitment for each other.
Has he said why he is not ready for a relationship? What does he call what you and he have now - friendship?
You have a decision to make. If being in a committed confessed relationship is important to you, you may have to move on. This does not make you or him a bad person. Perhaps you two are just looking for different things in life and are not compatible in that way.
I personally would like to get married so I would not date a woman who was not interested in marriage ever. Of course, I would not propose on the first date, nor would I pressure a woman to make that serious of a commitment to me.
I would just simply not spend too much time with someone who I knew did not want the same things that I did. We could be friends, but I could not be romantically involved with them because I would feel as though I was wasting my time.
Again, it does not mean that your "boy friend" is a bad person, it just means that you two want different things out of life.
He might make a great friend for you, but maybe you need to look elsewhere for a future husband.
2007-01-27 21:47:33 · answer #2 · answered by Seldom Seen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
JUST ASK HIM!!! Obviously if ya'll have been together for a year now you ain't just "friends." If your boyfriend is anything like me in this type of situation, then he probably wants to make sure that you're the "real thing." Committing to marriage is a big step. I myself don't ever want to have to get divorced. When it ever(if it does) happens normally there are more people involved than just the couple. You should try talking to him. Let him know that "He's the man of your life." That type of comment has to get a response. If it doesn't, then ask yourself what you really want out of life. If he is still the guy that you will need and want forever, then stick around. There is always a chance that he will come around. Men are as difficult for women as women are for men. Hopefully I have helped you a little bit. Good luck!!
2007-01-27 21:50:54 · answer #3 · answered by MICHAEL T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get intimate at all and see how he reacts to this. If he gets upset and threatens to leave, then you know he's thinking with his thing and not his heart. Be careful, though, he might be quick to jump into a relationship just to keep it intimate.
Don't let him string you along and play head games. Don't even wait around for someone who can't make a commitment.
2007-01-27 21:33:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There might be a few pieces missing in his puzzle that he requires to fall in love. Find the missing pieces and complete the puzzle.
2007-01-27 21:36:03 · answer #5 · answered by grtoo9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it physical at all? If so, there's your answer. If not, maybe he's just a commitment phobe.
2007-01-27 21:31:48 · answer #6 · answered by spelling nazi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say but, he is in a relationship
Tell him to wake up and be a man
2007-01-27 21:31:40 · answer #7 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop waiting for him. It is obvious he doesn't WANT to commit.
2007-01-27 21:32:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋