Swami Sukhabodhananda
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One youngster comes to me very depressed and asks this question "Why is God creating so many difficulties for us? How to handle stress?" I tell this youngster to reflect on this beautiful story:
A man goes to a shop, picks up a beautiful cup and says "my god this cup is so beautiful" and suddenly the cup starts talking to the man. The cup starts saying "O man, I am beautiful right now, but what was the state of my being before the pot-maker made me a beautiful pot?
Before I was sheer mud and the pot-maker pulled me out of the mud from the mother earth and I felt why that pot-maker is so cruel, he has separated me from mother earth. I felt a tremendous pain. And the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me and churned me, when I was churned I felt so giddy, so painful, so stressful, I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me into a oven and heated me up, I felt completely burnt. There was tremendous pain and I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait."
Then he poured hot paint on me and I felt the fume and the pain, I again asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then again he put me into an oven and heated it to make me more strong, I felt life is so painful hence pleaded the pot-maker and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." And after that the pot-maker took me to the mirror and said, "Now look at yourself". And surprisingly I found myself so beautiful.
When god gives us lot of trouble, it appears god is very cruel but we need patience and we have to wait. When bad things happen to good people, they become better and not bitter.
So all difficulties are part of a cosmic design to make us really beautiful. We need patience, we need understanding, we need the commitment to go through in a very calm and wise way. So all difficulties are not to tumble us but to humble us.
With this understanding, let us not be against difficulty. Understand difficulty is a part of a purifying process. A purifying process at present which we cannot understand and hence we need faith and we need trust.
Let us understand how to handle stress with this background. You can be affected by stress from two angles. There is an internal stress and there is an external stress. Nobody can avoid stress; one has to only manage stress. Managing stress can be internal and also external.
The internal stress is; your thoughts can create stress, your values can create stress, and your beliefs can create stress, meaning thereby your stress is coming from your mind more from the outer world. Many people suffer not from heart attack - they suffer from thought-attack.
For example, when somebody says you are an idiot, we get so hurt, we get so victimised. My boss has called me an idiot and I am feeling tremendous pain. Now where does this stress come from? If my boss has called me an idiot, I have to ask myself "am I an idiot"?
If I am an idiot nothing to be upset about; and if I am not an idiot, then also nothing to be upset about! It is the perception of the boss. But why do we suffer from that stress? I suffer not because my boss has called me an idiot but because of the thought-attack.
I may say the boss has called me an idiot; therefore I am suffering? It is true that the words are unpleasant. But what hurts is the interpretation of the unpleasant word. The thought in me interprets. That is pain and therefore it becomes pain. Much of our stress is our mind interpreting it as pain. So we suffer from thought-attack more than heart attack.
2007-01-27 11:24:34
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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Mediation. Lots of it. Clear out all the worthless crap and focus on the things most important to you. This should clear out what is not needed and provide you with direction in life. The only way to clear the barrier of stress is to vent. Do things enjoyable.
2007-01-27 11:30:12
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answer #2
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answered by Dusty C 1
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You know the Swami is right, and his story is a beautiful metaphor, but unfortunately I think he is under the impression that everyone has the capacity to get a hold of themselves and ultimately correct what ever attitudes they may have, and eventually over come the stress in their lives. I think if it were that simple we would just have a kind of mental boot camp that psychiatrists would send us too and within 4 to 8 weeks of diligent mental conditioning we would be able to overcome any stressful difficulty we have been subjected too. If it were only that simple I do believe in my own heart that whatever does not kill you, makes you stronger. But I have seen enough people in my 62 years to know that they do not all feel that way. I have seen people so beaten down, so early in life, that they are no longer able to function and ultimately begin to drift, even as young as they are. I also believe that we as a species have become who we are through about 60% nature, (genetics) and 40% nuture. (our environment and our upbringing). Recent readings have shown me what can happen to two identical twins when they were separated at birth. One was nutured well with loving parents, and the other was nutured poorly with abusive parents, etc. The physical differences were remarkable even though they were identical twins. Imagine what their mental differences may have been. We are who we are, and and our genetics can put us on the road to being very emotional and sensitive, and that can make us not tolerate stress as well as some others can. It is not a sign of weakness etc.
Recent work with military men returning from Iraq has pointed this out. Men who have admitted to being affected by Post Tramatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) have been ostrasized in their units when they admit to having succomb to this. They are no longer trusted by their military comrades, who will tell you that they endure terrible conditions and do heroic stuff, not for love of country, but for love of their comrades. Therefore, to loose trust by these men you would have died for is the ultimate stress. But it is a known fact that about 30% of the men and women who are put into battle suffer from PTSD. They used to call it shell shock in WW I, and Battle Fatigue in WW II and Korea, but eventually it was diagnosed as a real physical disease caused by severe stress. Now even cat scan evidence shows that the size of the amygdala of the brain, where pleasure is deciphered and appreciated is diminished by as much as one half in persons suffering from PTSD.
http://www.psycheducation.org/emotion/amygdala.htm
One interesting story is about a Marine sergeant who expressed disgust for one of the men in his company who had outed himself as suffering from PTSD. Initially in the course of the TV documentary which was being done about PTSD this sergeant spoke about this man as though he was the scum of the earth. Then as they were finishing up their documentary some months later, the sergeant came up to the original interviewer and admitted that he too was now seeking help for his situation which may be a form of PTSD as well.
Stress is real. We all suffer from it. There is a famous life stress scale (See first website below) where they mention a series of happening that may have affected your life over the course of the last 12 months. The top one is loss of a spouse with 100 points... whereas just being married is 50 (LOL), but if you add up your score and it exceeds 400 points then you have been exposed to severe stress. Even good things are on this scale. Christmas is 25 points. So my point is that life is stressful, even the good life. Time is usually the healer. Even the death of a spouse eventually becomes bearable for most over time. But some take more time then others, and finally there are those who will not let it go... That is where you need to talk it out with a professional.
Some suicide is so sad because it is the permanent solution to a temporary problem. Frequently even the need to solve something so stressful as with suicide is seen as not having been as terrible as it seemed when enough time is given to the situation.
I have personally adopted the concept that I only try to deal with it one day at a time. The past is history and can not be rewritten. The future is a dream and can not be manipulated. The present is only today, and it is a gift. That is why they call it The Present...
Whatever your situation, Time will usually heal what stress you are currently enduring. However, if there is already a strong time component in your situation, and you are still feeling overwhelmed by the stress you have identified, then it is time to seek help. There is no shame in that... One final thought physical excercise has been shown to be helpful in overcoming stress. It may help you as well. Good luck whatever it is that happens in the near future for you.
2007-01-27 12:47:05
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answer #3
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answered by a_gyno_guy 3
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Do daily aerobics and stretching exercises.
Takes only about 15 minutes of your time, but you feel GREAT the entire day.
I have been dealing with depression all my life. The more I exercise, the better I feel.
2007-01-27 11:40:30
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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I was gonna say suck it up and drive on and then call you a derrogitory name but that first answere just took all the fight outta me you win this time touchy feely people . Ill be back!
2007-01-27 11:29:30
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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Try using *Quantum Products at *layers of Light International*
it will truly change your life!
2007-01-27 11:45:59
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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try taking care of urself. exercise socialize, if u need a good buddy i'm here dogmicjoe@yahoo.com. try also taking a break. get a CD.
2007-01-27 11:28:50
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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take time and do for yourself, decompress and pamper yourself and keep yourself around positive people
2007-01-27 11:27:19
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answer #8
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answered by pa625 5
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