My boyfriend recently told he doesn't trust, it hurt so much because i really love him and i've never done anything to make him not trust me. I always knew he had trust issues because he's gotten his heart broken before, so i tried to show through my actions that i love him very much and that i'm not out to break his heart by cheating on him, but no matter what i say or do he still just waiting for me to "mess up". I feel like i'm always under a microscope when i'm with him and it is affecting how we relate to each, it hard to get close to him and he's not the type i can get to talk about his feelings.
I dont know what to do make him see that i'm for real. What do you think i should do, i don't want to loose him.
2007-01-27 04:19:18 · 13 answers · asked by JudiM 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Judi, I think as women, we've all dealt with this issue at some point in our lives. The one thing I've learned, though, is that if you knew he was like this in the beginning, why did you decide to keep going with the relationship? There really isn't much you can do to change a man once he's got his mind set that all women are cheaters. Staying in the relationship really won't do much to change him, and trust me...I see patients like this all the time. The best thing to do is to let him know how you feel, tell him that what he's thinking is tearing you apart and that if he doesn't learn to cope with his problem that you'll be leaving.
You may not want to lose him, but losing your sanity is worse. There is nothing wrong with the way you feel and you shouldn't put your feelings to the side to accommodate anyone. You are precious and so are your feelings and your heart...search inside yourself and find the answer...no one here can provide that for you..but we can suggest, can't we? I hope you make the right decision.
2007-01-27 04:30:35 · answer #1 · answered by Emerald 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Even though hes had trust issues in the past, he needs to see that your being true to him. If it continues, then I say move on. Why be in a relationship when the other person cant and wont ever trust you? Is it really worth all the effort? Just have a serious talk with him. If hes willing to sit down and listen to you and tell you how he feels, then hopefully he'll change.
2007-01-27 04:30:36 · answer #2 · answered by PfcsBaby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think i might know why he has trust issues.
He might be a very jeleous person. And he just loves you so much that he's afraid that if you do something with anyone else, he won't know what to do. Do you hang out with other guys? That might also be the problem. All guys get mad when their girlfriend hangs out with other guys.
Always tell him you love him. Tell him you will never ever leave him. I hope i helped at least a little bit.
2007-01-27 04:27:21 · answer #3 · answered by Zack N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe his past reallyy did hurt him a lot. and you dont really know all the details. maybe you should put him on the spot. but dont be too mean. just ask him if he cant trust why is he with you? but if he's just waiting for you to mess up just always BE with him. that mite bug him because your actually spending time with him and he doesn't know how to handle that anymore. but even if hes not the type to talk his feelings try hard to get it out. or maybe even ask one of his family members or friends to talk to him. but its better if you do because then it shows ur there for him and that you really DO love him.
2007-01-27 04:27:53 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a guy is insecure it way he's doing some thing improper also. In a relationship you need to provide your 100% or you're going to preserve doubting the other individual. Possibly he isnt giving a hundred percent within the relationship. However yeah i realize him. When my gf would talk to different guys i would get mad also on account that in a relationship your commited to only pay awareness to the opposite individual. To fix the difficulty my gf showed me all her txt and even gave me her fb password and stuff. Cuz if theirs nothing to hide theirs no difficulty proper
2016-08-10 13:57:15 · answer #5 · answered by calles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey! Try telling him how his words have hurt you, he's probably not picking up on the actions. Explain that you trust him and ask him how you can gain his trust.
2007-01-27 04:26:11 · answer #6 · answered by Girly girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to understand your need for trust, and you need to understand his need for space to make his own decisions. My advice, give the situation time. He won't be able to trust you immediately, but if you continue to show that you care about him deeply he will begin to gain your trust over time. In the meantime, be patient and try and understand him and his reasons for being afraid of trust.
2007-01-27 04:30:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him how he can trust you. Heart never breaks it is our bed intentions which are not fulfilled. If you love your sister ,are you not going to love her after her marriage ? Love is a much wider ..wider.. matter. What actions you adopt to satisfy him.
2007-01-27 04:34:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a talk with him, and tell him, he is not giving your relationship a chance, and it is never going to work, with him thinking like this. He has to work on himself, Trust me, he is going to get worst! For peace of mind, you must move on with your life, he is never going to make you happy!
2007-01-27 04:27:40 · answer #9 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't spend your life that way! Let go of him!
I mean it. Don't try to live under this microscope. You will be miserable and scared forever.
2007-01-27 04:25:46 · answer #10 · answered by kiwi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋