Having a problem with Adoption?

Question

I have made enqiures into extending our family , and to give achild a loving stable home , i have two children of my own and i live in a three bedroom house, the lady who came to visit us said there could be a problem with the sleeping arrangement i did suggest that the child would be in the same room with his big brother in a bunk bed please give us some advise

i have a 16 year old girl and a 12 year old boy so i don't think it would be that appropriate for them to share a room together. Also with any luck, the child will be between 0-4

My 12 year old is Autistic, and i would consider adopting a disabled child

Answer 1

i dont see any problem with this. depends on how old the child is. if your son doesn't mind sharing a room then thee shouldnt be a problem, the dhs are really particular though.

Answer 2

Hi there,

I was a treatment foster parent for a number of years and I always was told that it was fine for children of the same sex to share a bedroom, but that it was age dependent. There shouldn't be more then a four year difference so that there interests will be the same. A 3 year old would be thrilled with a bug room, not so much the teen. Also, there are concerns that the older child ends of providing child care etc in the nights. With adoption and foster care there is often concerns around prior abuse, depending on the circumstances the adopted child lived in before, that you may never know about. If they started sexually acting out and it hadn't been seen before, your oldest boy would certainly have to be interviewed. That would be awful for everyone.

Please understand that I am in no way saying your child would ever do anything, or that you wouldn't be supervising, just with the adoption of older children there may be issues and you would want to protect your older son.

Answer 3

My friend was told that the adopted child would have to have his own bedroom, although her own child was a boy too. Silly really! If the adopted child is not supposed to be singled out, and is to be treated the same as biological children, then sharing a bedroom should be part of that. Not every child had his/her own room, so why should it be different for adopted children?
How about your 2 kids sharing a room, therefore leaving the other room for the adopted child? But the problem there is that your kids may resent the adopted child for making them share. Have a word with the social worker and see if you can reach a compromise, or see what she has to say...Good luck!!

Answer 4

I can't understand this i thought they were crying out for people to adopt, it doesn't make sense. Where has it come from that children have to have there own bedrooms? Years ago it was 3/4 to a bed room. It doesnt make any sense to me, you sound lovely and you will be giving a child a loving and stable home. What is there problem? Good luck sweetie

Answer 5

I think it's crazy that they want to make a mountain out of a mole hill so to speak. You want to adopt a child. So what if that child won't have his very own room and have to share with a sibling. I think it's selfish of the social worker to prevent you from adopting for only that reason. I don't know what to tell you other then to be persistent. And good luck. I hope you get a child to adopt!

Answer 6

the best person to ask would be the lady that came to visit, next time you see her or call her kindly ask her to explain what she felt the exact problem was with the sleeping arrangement then once you know for sure you can think of a way to resolve the issue if possible. Good luck.

Answer 7

An older child will probably want some personal space. Inviting a child into your home and forcing them to share a bedroom with another seems inconsiderate. Can't your two other children share a room?

Answer 8

children should be able to sleep in the same room if same sex.

if they are opposite sex, its up to one turns 8years old.

so that cant be a prob. is the bedroom big enough to put 2 single beds in as the woman was prob thinking about bunk beds.

lots of children share bedrooms with their brother/sister so i dont know why its aprob. have you asked her why this is a prob?? if you havent you should aske her as you might be able to change things

Answer 9

I do not see why there should be a problem.Good Luck

Answer 10

i don't see what there problem is either, i think you will be OK good luck