My mother is protective, why?

Question

She always wants to know what kind of guys I hang out with, and I always get so irritated when she does. How do I tell her that it sucks for her to want to know the kind of guys i hang out with?

Answer 1

Hey she loves you. she cares about you, and just wants to know where you are and who you are with. look just sit down with her and tell her how you are feeling. and what you don't like about what she is doing.

Answer 2

It sounds like you are really annoyed by her--almost angry. And you know, that is okay--a lot of people don't realize that ALL of our feelings are good, it's what you do with them that matters.

Your mom might be doing what a good parent is supposed to do: ask questions, keep tabs on their kids activities. You sound pretty smart--you are probably aware of some of the stuff that goes on in the world that for a lot of kids is potentially dangerous. Even if you live in the smallest town, the tiniest community, it's hard to escape all the horrible stuff that happens cuz we all are so linked by TV, the internet, etc. now.

Of course none of that is what you probably want to hear right now--you want a solution!

Tell her just that--that it is bothering you that she questions your judgement--but be prepared to hear her tell you that as your mother she has the right to question you like that. Try to keep your tone of voice calm, and non-judgemental--she might get defensive, but you can defuse her defensiveness by asking her what it is that she's feeling behind all of her protectiveness--she might be scared of what could happen to you, she might be thinking about a mistake she made when she was around your age, and she wants to make sure you don't repeat her past.

I know it can be hard to try to see your mom's point of view when you feel disrespected, not trusted--it's frustrating to not be trusted. Perhaps it's not you your mom distrusts, but the world around you--she wants to protect you from that....do you have a pet, or a special belonging that would just kill you if you lost it, or the pet died? That is sort of what your mom might be feeling about you--you are precious, you are irreplaceable--and while she might know she has to let you go at some point, it is very hard for her....

Answer 3

Oh you poor thing! I can't imagine having a mother who wants to know what kind of guys you're hanging with. I'll bet she always wanted to keep you from getting sick too when you were little. Did she make sure you ate healthful food too? And look both ways when you crossed the street? Why, if there were more mothers like yours there might be fewer teen pregnancies, fewer young women raped and murdered because they stayed away from dangerous places and violent people, fewer high school dropouts. Can you imagine what life would be like if that were to happen?

Answer 4

I fell that she just want the best for you and after all what kind of mother would she be if she did not ? Think about it would you rather have a mother that did did not care what happens to you I know of a boy in his teens his mother did not care enough to keep her son away from other kids that would and did get him in big **** , she throw him out and he was in his early teens , Now he calls me mom every now and then because his real mom did not want him or showed him any kind of love she just picked on him and now he is with me and his dad so I would be thankful you have a mother that dose care enough for her to ask questions ok. Think of it that way and you might think diffrent to

Answer 5

Your mother loves and cares about your well being. She doesn't want you to be hanging around with the wrong crowd and getting yourself in trouble so of course she is going to ask questions.

Bring them around the house so that she can get to know them so she can see that she has nothing to worry about. That should put an end to her irritating questions.

Answer 6

She is YOUR MOM and she has the right to know who you hang out with, where you are going, how long you will be gone and all the phone #'s of everyone you hang with. Dont like it----oh well. When you are of age to make your own adult decisions then you can ask these same questions, but for now you have to answer them.

Answer 7

Your mother loves and cares about you.She just wants you to be safe from harm because there are boys out there that may want to do bad things with you.One day you might be a mum and then you will understand.

Answer 8

She loves you and wants the best for you! Also, if you want to ease her worries then introduce her to them so she can see for herself. The only time I didn't ever want to tell my parents who I was hanging out with was because deep down I knew they weren't the kind of people I really should be hanging out with! Once my parents meet the people I hung out with they were so much easier on me - let me go out later, go on trips with these peopel. let me have them over, so it works out well to have her know your friends or boyfriends.

Answer 9

Hi there doll, i guess im a bit like yout mum, i have a daughter and i worry about her, u have to worry in this day and age, i know i should let my daughter find guys and other things out for herself, but that doesnt stop us mums from worrying, its not until u have kids of your own that u realise what us mums go through, it is a shame that we have to be like this but all we want for you is to be safe and happy,,,,,,, good luck doll p.s you are lucky you have a mum that loves you so much to worry about you, lots of parents dont give a dam what there kids get up to. xxx

Answer 10

to make sure you don't amke friends with me little one but don't worry i am not looking for friends have plenty.
some people don't play nice or by the rules and seem to be your friend so they can get you where they want to do what they want and don't play justany old doctor games.