I have been talking to a really smart, funny and cool seeming guy online for two months. He is 34 and was engaged until last Fall (he broke it off because he didnt se ehimself with his fiance forever)
He lives 200 miles away from me in Boston so we haven't met yet.
I checked out his entire background with his approval so Id feel safe if we met.
The thing is is Im really happy where I live and he couldnt relocate here because of his job. I would have to move my whole life there if things got serious. Also I still need to lose about 15-20 lbs before Im in great shape. Im pretty happy w/ myself right now. But he jokes around that he is 'shallow' & although a woman's mind is important, looks come first when he meets someone. He says he needs someone smart who looks great in a dress
I know that makes him sound shallow. But otherwise he has acted so cool. Plus he himself is handsome and in good shape.
Should I put off meeting him until Im at my best or is this a bad idea ?
2007-01-26 20:13:49 · 18 answers · asked by I♥agoodhug 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When the decision to meet each other after only knowing through the internet, means you have a liking or even fallen in love with someone merely by knowing him through his words on the computer screen. My opinion is, there are many type of endings on cyberlove relationship such as good, bad and even ugly stories after meeting up. But based on many stories on cyberlove, most end up with ugly stories because the person you are communicating on-line might not be the same person you are going to meet..he can be a jerk. You need to take note that there are also many people in this cyberworld which are trained by professionals on how to influence and capture your heart through what sort of nice words to use, the effective steps how to know your interests and desires and slowly you will be in their world. You will feel that you have found your dream and soulmate. The words they use will soothe you so nicely that you will feel loved and comfortable and wanted them to be in your life. Based on experiences, it would be wise for you to take a step back, think about it, share with your friends for advice and you can check on the internet on those ugly stories on cyberlove how the victims are being cheated and dumped after physically invovled. My opinion is to take care and if given a choice, forget about the meeting and invest your time on someone real. Love sees with the heart and not from the mind. Cyberlove are merely fantasies which the actions through words from a person you haven't met can make make you go crazy and go after this person and is very dangerous. There are many websites offering very good information on this subject and maybe you may want to explore before you decide what to do next. Just do a search on Yahoo, type in "Cyberlove Stories" and you will get alot of advice and experiences suffered from people invovled.
2007-01-26 23:20:02 · answer #1 · answered by frankie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the e-mail method is the only way to meet people, you will be subject to being anything from happy to disappointed to downright in danger. What did people do before computers??? They met and talked in person...they met people who were from the area and didn't hide behind a screen. You better get out and go locally looking for fun, excitement and new people. If this guy or anyone else cannot accept you for what and who you are, then you don't need them. You will put way too much pressure on yourself and feel like you have to fit a certain mold---thenthat will lead to even more serious issues when you cannot reach oir maintain those goals. You don't need to fail at a task that is completely uncalled ofr. Let him meet someone else and torment them. And as for you--it is just as easy to eat GOOD as it is to eat BAD---start a diet change and it will come off in no time. But I'm sure you are a beautiful person just the way you are and someone close by and in person will discover you. Best of luck and BE CAREFUL
2007-01-26 20:24:24 · answer #2 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate. I also met a guy online recently and we've been emailing, IMing and talking on the phone for over an hour every time he calls. You're lucky that you've got mutual friends who can back up what this guy says about himself. Some people do a background check on the person before meeting them in person. It doesn't hurt to be on the safe side. If you've hit it off and are talking on the phone for hours at a time, you might as well make a date to meet him in person. I've already set a date with my guy and its been a little over a month since we started exchanging emails. Just make sure it's in a public place and you let your friends and family know exactly where you're going to be. Good luck.
2016-03-15 00:37:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't like you for you maybe he'll just have to miss out. You are feeling you are not good enough for this guy already and you haven't even met him person to person yet. Meet him now. 15 pounds isn't nothing. I've gained 40 lbs in sixteen months from some medicine I have been taking and my botfriend says he likes my butt that way. Be with someone who makes you feel good about yourself no matter what is going on with you or in your life.
2007-01-26 20:22:03 · answer #4 · answered by hstoic01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no way do you wait. it may be that he would already think you are perfect. If you have had chemistry online, go ahead and meet him as long as you feel safe. But meet in a public place, and bring a friend. Best wishes
2007-01-26 20:17:56 · answer #5 · answered by karen i 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is already making you feel that you could never be good enough for him. Hiding behind 'i'm just the usual shallow guy' is just BS. If youre happy with yourself stay as you are, you don't owe him anything. Meet if you want (safely) but be prepared for it not working out, may be it will turn out fine.
2007-01-26 20:33:36 · answer #6 · answered by Basket-santa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's that shallow, you'd be better off without him anyway. Go now and see if things spark with you, not just your looks.
2007-01-26 20:17:47 · answer #7 · answered by tony1athome 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My god....He's really 57, bald, fat, and walks with a limp. He also served 10 years for rape, and you want to meet him.
You Poke'ee's
2007-01-26 20:19:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats risky, he may sound good on paper but your better off going out with your neighbor.
2007-01-26 20:19:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,,,try meet him at public place
but tell him send you his picture first.
be careful my dear and good luck
2007-01-26 20:20:28 · answer #10 · answered by ALOHA BOY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋