I need help with bedtime behavior?

Question

I have 2 children ages 5 and 7.
They sleep on a bunkbed in the same room. I can not seperate them, I don't have an extra room.

They have a set bedtime and I am concerned and I try to be very strict that they get to sleep on time, especially on a school night or else they wake up tired and groggy.

My problem with them is that they talk and chatter with each other.
I have tried threatening them (I really don't like it) I take away their stuffed animals that they like to sleep with and the only thing that seems to work is if I stay in the room with them and tell them if they talk, they are grounded.

I can't and shouldn't have to continue this.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

Answer 1

My sister and I (3 years apart) had bunk beds and did the same thing to Mom and Dad. Anytime we were caught talking or otherwise staying up past bed time, we had to go to bed 15 minutes earlier the next night. It didn't sound like much or a big deal, but it was a pain in the butt when we were both in our bunks at 7PM and finally learned to be silent ...for 2 hours until we passed out from boredom (go figure, at bed time)! To top it off, we only were allowed to gain 15 minutes a night back, which seemed to take 20 times longer than losing the time!

Answer 2

My 13 - year - old stays up in his room, as well. He's not doing a thing except maybe staring at the walls and ceiling. He's actually been giving us a problem getting up for school. So my husband backed his bedtime up earlier to "give him extra time to stare at the walls." I would try that. Send them in earlier til they can prove that they'll get on to sleep w/out the chatter. I would continue going back in 30 min sections til they got the point. I think, for the most part though, it's just kids being kids. Good luck.

Answer 3

Your kids are bonding during this time. My kids shared a room at those same ages.. and when my oldest got his own room, he'd often go into the girls room at night and chatter with them for a little bit, quietly, until he was ready to go into his own room to go to sleep. They MISSED each other. That's a special time for them... Here it is, 10 years later, and they STILL talk about some of those conversations (sometimes they were belching contests, I have to admit!)

That said, yes, it's important for you to set boundaries around that time. They can't stay up all night talking.. but they do need some wind-down time. The younger children aren't really old enough to observe the boundaries you set, so it'll take some reminders.

Just keep at it... and understand their need to have that time together. They're not fighting, are they? If not?? Let them visit a little... then remind them it's time to settle down and be quiet. As they get a little older, they'll just naturally quiet down...

By the way... I still have to holler occasionally at my girls... they're in separate rooms now and involved in many activities... so sometimes they only time they have to reconnect is at bedtime. I let them visit for awhile, then shoo them off to bed...

Answer 4

Hey there-I have a 6 yr old who is great at that! What we have tried over the last two weeks is I made a special calendar just for him, every day that he has a "good" day (this could be from eating his dinner to getting to bed on time, not talking back etc.) He then gets a sticker for that day. At the end of the month, each sticker is worth $ (you make the amount) that he can either save for something big like a video game or he can spend it at the store when we go. It seems to be working really well so far.
When he has a bad day-no sticker he knows it so it's like a punishment, but you aren't having to take away something! Hope it helps! Good luck.

Answer 5

Allow the 7 year old to stay up a little longer (you don't say if they are boys or girls, I will assume girls), "because you are getting to be a big girl now". Leave the 7 year old to play quietly in another room and tuck the 5 year old in and read her a short story. Then leave her to go to sleep.

Read a story to the year old in another room, being very quiet "so that your little sister can go to sleep". Then when the little one is asleep, put the big one in bed being very quiet "so you don't wake your little sister".

It will take up less time than yelling at them for 2 hours and be a lot less stressful and they will get more sleep.

Answer 6

Since separation isn't an option, have you thought of putting the younger to bed a bit earlier and the elder a bit later, so hopefully if the youngest is asleep then the elder would have no choice but to sleep.
I used to sleep in the same room as my sister, but I don't remember it ever being a problem with us keeping each other awake, maybe because we never really got along. ;)

Answer 7

set their bedtime 45 min earlier than what time they need to be to sleep, this will give them time to chatter, if bedtime is 9 put them to bed at 8 15 and lights out at 8 30.

Answer 8

I would suggest letting the older child stay up a little longer than the younger one, because than that way you can get one to bed while the other one is getting ready for bed. Then hopefully when it is time for the older child to go to bed the younger one is already asleep, then the older one whould go to sleep alot faster because there won't be the distraction of the younger sibling.
Just a thought...

Answer 9

set a different routine.homework,supper,30 minutes of playtime,bathtime,30 more minutes playtime,read a story,then allow them to pick a movie to watch.give them a chance to watch it quietly,if they dont abide by the rules tell them no tv and turn the lights off.after a few nights of laying in the dark theyll decide to watch the movie quietly while they fall asleep.good luck my boys are 9 and 5 they also share a room with bunkbeds.my biggest problem now is to get them to stop wrestling

Answer 10

Honestly I have no idea.. b/c my brother and i had to share a room together also.. also had a bunkbed.. and we would talk and our mother would yell, scream and tell us not to talk all of the time. No you shouldn't have to stay in the room for them to go to sleep.. but if taking away privaleges and favorite items is not making them stop then you might just have to stay in there and wait it out till they learn. Or have the youngest go to bed 30 to 1 hour prior to the oldest childs bedtime and then he should be alseep prior to your next child going to bed... and if he does happen to wake up then he will be to tired to start a convo... should be anyways goodluck