INFERTILITY:: depression, anger, don't know how to place my emotions. How can I deal???

Question

I had a doctors appointment the other day to talk about birth control just for a short while and I spoke with my doc about how irregular my periods have been and how I have been charting ( I brought the charts with me and let her see them) once she reviewed the charts because I am not quite sure how to read them very well, What I thought was ovulation really wasn't. I haven't been ovulating for the past 6 months at all, my doc put me on birth control pills to see if it would at least regulate my period a little better and then wants me to see what happens after that, I am against fertility drugs because my mother had a horrible experience with them and I am scared of it happening to me, I am so hurt and upset I have broken out into hives all over my body because of all of this. I don't know how to better place my anger, I feel myself slipping into depression over this. Has anyone else been through this?? How did you deal. I really wanted another baby!!!!!!!

How dare someone tell me that I am being selfish because I want to get pregnant again. Yes I am very thankful that I have been blessed with my beautiful little boy, but if me wanting another baby is selfish then there are a lot of other women on here that are selfish as well. That was just plain mean for someone to say something like that.

Answer 1

Yes, I've been on that wheel of infertility. It's so hard! I didn't really cope well, but I made it through and I think that's all that matters. It was great having my hubby to lean on. Even though he sometimes broke down too. But, it has made our marriage so much stronger!

Infertility was like the fire that a piece of clay goes through. Once that clay gets in that oven it's changed. It become a piece of art. It's stronger than it was before..and that's our marriage.

I took infertility meds. They really aren't as dangerous as they used to be, and they work!! If you see a Reproductive Endocronoligist (fertility clinic specialist) they will explain everything to you. This includes all the risks with the meds. But, my son was worth it all and I'd do it all over again!

PS: My cycles were irregular also. Birth control did make them VERY regular. This time it was easier to get pregnant - we got pregnant the first time trying this time around :)) I would advise you to look into www.zetek.com. This took the worry and stress out of charting. I didn't need to interpret anything or rely on someone else's interpretation.

One last thing...
My doc also told me I wasn't ovulating by the looks of my charts. I didn't buy it at all. He said the peaks were actually the hormones, but my body wasn't making or releasting an egg. HOWEVER, he was shocked when I showed up at his office to tell him I was pregnant on my own ;)

Answer 2

that would be hard. A womans longing for a child is like something out of this world. However, I knew a lady that had a period approx every 3 months and she had her family.... how do you know that you are not ovulating?

Keep with the program, it is discouraging.. .but at least it is hope

As for the anger and depression, that is totally normal. The only thing I can suggest is yoga and meditation.. I went through alot of hard times in the last year and 1/2 and I just meditated.. I realized that I am a spirit in this body.. this life is a game... i am a player in iit and these are just circumstances... mediation helps you look at the big picture... your feelings are valid. But you are not your feelings. You are not your body. You are what's inside, what contintues on after your emotions are spent and your body is gone... just breathe.. just let go... just believe.

It can happen, keep your chin up

Answer 3

Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..

But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.

Helping you eliminate depression?

Answer 4

I promise I will keep you in my prayers. I don't want to say that I'm sorry for you because you are a strong woman who is seeking help......and that takes a lot of strenght. Please don't take your mother's experience as your own. Even if you are her daughter, it doesn't mean that by "genetics" it will happen to you. My friend underwent fertility treatment and got pregnant. I have another friend that has tried for 9 years unsuccessfully. Focus your energy in things that you want to do withyour life....besides having more children. What have you been putting off? School? Dancing lessons? Writing for the local paper? Enjoying a massage? Celebrate yourselfr! You are a woman, you were made strong by nature. There is this one website that has helped me tremendously, www.selfesteem4women.com. You don't have to use it, but they offer different ideas and support. Be selfish for once, and take care of yourself, of your needs. Remember that you are a beautiful person and that's all that matters.

Answer 5

Have you considered a surrogate? Have you considered adoption? I understand your fertility frustration personally, however, I believe that you "want to be a parent", not necessarily "be able to get pregnant"........If that is the case, then there are plenty of options available to you. Fertility drugs can cause havoc on your physical and emotional state. If you fear that you are not going to be emotionally and physically prepared, then I suggest you consider the alternatives mentioned in the first sentences of my response. Once I decided to be at peace with my infertility by realizing, that what I REALLY WANTED WAS TO BE A PARENT, it was easy to take off those guilty heavy bricks off of my shoulders. I am now a Waiting Parent with an adoption agency, and I could not be more excited knowing that my husband and I will be parents sometime, hopefully, in the very near future.

Answer 6

This is a very good question. My dad is strugeling with the same type of problems. What I believe Is happening to you is that these thing that are hapenning in your life is mistakes that you made it is not God testing you but more Satan trying to drag you away from God. In such a time I whould advise you to take at least one our a day just for God pray to him asking for a way out trust in him He wil not always respond as fast as you want or how you want. But He wil also not leave you alone. I always say when your in trouble don't ask for what you think is right but ask for what He thinks is right

Answer 7

God will send you a baby if that is what is meant for you. Don' t slip into depression because a lot of people are going through the very same thing you are. Just be thankful you have one

Answer 8

Well a nurse at my ob was told she wouldn't be able t ahve kids and the doc put her on the shot to regulate her hormones and she got preggers! she now has 2 children and they are everything she ever dreamed. Good luck to you i have a feeling you'll be fine

Answer 9

wow - sorry to hear that. Keep in mind what your mom went through is due to antiquated medical practices. How bout googling infertility treatments?

Answer 10

No, I was pretty upset when I found out that I wasn't infertile like I had hoped. The world is verging on over population. Instead of making another baby, why not adopt an unwanted, hurt or abused child who needs you? While you are entitled to your emotions, you are not entitled to selfishness.