How do I help my mother without destroying my relationship with my boyfriend. He doesn't want to give her money because it is not his job to support her. But I can't help her because I have no money of my own. She did this before and asked for money once and he gave it and then she kept on asking. Then she owed us like 2000 dollars. Now she wants more help. She paid off what was owed before, but now she wants more.!!!! Please help me. I really love him and don't want to lose him because of my mother.
2007-01-26 13:07:59 · 9 answers · asked by Jorge's Wife 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No it is not that she doesn't want to get a job. She is partially disabled and can't get disability. Sorry I didn't put this on at first.
2007-01-26 13:34:31 · update #1
I don't know why your mother has to ask people for money,but I know it's not right to be asking your boyfriend for it...If your mother has a spending problem, she might need professional help. I think you should explain your feelings to her so she doesn't expect money from your boyfriend anymore..Tell your boyfriend how you feel about him and that you don't expect him to support your mothers financial problems.
2007-01-26 13:20:26 · answer #1 · answered by oohJOHNNY 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not your job to interfere with people who need to learn their own lesson. Sometimes we have to see loved ones go through hard times in order to help themselves. Don't interfere with her life lesson. Tell her no. No matter what she is still your mom. She probably won't even be mad. She may put on a show for you (cry and talk a little mess), but she'll get over it and ask you for some more money later.
2007-01-26 21:37:56 · answer #2 · answered by alwaysloved4ever 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it was me... I would give her $2,000 that she has to pay back. Then tell her that she is cut off, NO MORE.... and that she needs to get a job and if she does have one that she needs to get a promotion. You cannot support your mother your entire life. Don't be rude about it, just tell her that you love her and want to help all you can, but you have a life of your own and cannot keep it up. You need money to support yourself. I hope this helps.
2007-01-26 21:15:45 · answer #3 · answered by wwefan3620 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is right in his thinking. Your mother is an
adult and no matter what her financial situation is, she has
crossed the line in asking any friends of her daughters to
help her financially. There are credit consolidators out there
to help her lower her monthly bills and she can earn extra
money by working two jobs along with millions of responsible
people who need to make ends meet. You could help by
getting a job to pay for personal things you might need ...the
ball is in her court.
2007-01-26 21:35:31 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could say that he has invested it for a period of time. Locked in investment. Your mum has found an easy solution to getting her hands on money and if he keeps lending one day it may not come back!!!! Your mum is the parent and she is responsible for her own debts at all times. Looks like you have found a really nice guy their. dont worry about your mum and dont feel guilty, if you didnt have that boyfriend what would she do about money then? Every day there is a lesson to learn in life maybe her day has come!!!
2007-01-26 21:21:38 · answer #5 · answered by Bev J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're mother can't support herself then she needs to be out somewhere it's as simple as that, but if she just wants the money and doesn't actually need it, then don't give in to her. It's like if you give the puppy food off the table as a dog he'll always be a begger.
2007-01-26 21:16:03 · answer #6 · answered by Tell.Me.Sweetly. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i understand you ...you have to make your mom understand that you cant always help her. you have bills of your own. explain to her that your relationship is in danger because of her financial situation,tell her that you would love to help her but u can't.
2007-01-26 21:30:33 · answer #7 · answered by ana u 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to get a damn job and if she refuses then stay away from her for a while before she ruins your relationship.
2007-01-26 21:17:34 · answer #8 · answered by angel h 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well i think u should just tell ur mother whats going on and why he wont lend her money....or mayb she could solve that rpoblem by working...
2007-01-26 21:14:45 · answer #9 · answered by Blaze1006 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋