I have been talking to a lady for about a month now, she has a chaotic schedule and pretty much school consumes most of her time, and work the rest of the time. She has Wednesday's and Saturday's to study and catch up on stuff. We had a spell there where I didn't hear from her for about 6 days, and she told me that her schedule is what the problem is. I pretty much said I don't want to be a thorn in your side and get in your way, she said I didn't and that if it wasn't for her schedule being the way it is, she would love to date me. I told her that I would be patient till everything slows down, but I failed to ask her when it would slow down, so that is up in the air. My question is: With all this craziness going on, and I just told her that I am going to be patient. Did I do the right thing? I don't want to seem desparate, so what other advice could you give me?
Thank you very much
2007-01-26
07:35:31
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35 answers
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asked by
Light Bringer
3
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Singles & Dating
she is on a mission to improve her future. you are a gem to understand this and allow her to concentrate on this mission at this time. Adding pressure to the situation will not increase her chances of success. she sounds like a very good person for you to know. she will someday be an amazing asset to a relationship. And barring a relationship, she will manage just fine on her own.
you don't seem desperate to me. Just realistic. and she sounds worth the wait.
what are you doing about your future? maybe you could pursue something that will benefit your future and maybe you will both be done about the same time. Wow!!
2007-01-26 07:44:50
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answer #1
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answered by martinmagini 6
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OK, I know I'm not a lady answering this question but I've been through it myself. Never wait on anyone no matter what their schedule is or whatever it may be that takes away their time. In all honesty why should you commit to a relationship when the person isn't? I think the fairest thing you could tell her is that you really like her and would love to get to spend more time with her, but you can't wait and maybe with some hope you'll still be single when the time comes to her to have more free time in her life. Watch your attitude and demeanor while saying this if you chose to handle it this way, it could really be mad if it comes across the wrong way, as always be sincere. She'll understand and you won't feel so trapped into deciding if it's the right thing or not.
2007-01-26 07:49:10
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answer #2
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answered by matt82682 2
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Maybe U might ask her if she needs a "study-buddy" for 1 or both of her 2 nights off since you said you've only been talking & not seeing each other. It isn't being desperate but somewhere deep down U must have feel something to even consider the waiting deal.
However, on the 6 days front I don't see why she couldn't find time for a text message or even pop off a quick email, maybe a voice message. Respect & common courtesy is a 2 way street!!! U have to do what is right for U & nobody else & only U know what that is.
Write back if ya like !!!
2007-01-26 07:49:25
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answer #3
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answered by betharoo63 2
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I have to ask, by telling her you will be patient are you really that willing to truly be patient? Or are you setting yourself up for a big disappointment? You know her schedule why does it matter when her time will be less consumed? I mean if its not this it may be something else later on. Some people are just always on the go.
Only way to handle this is to NOT have any expectations. All she may be able to provide right now is some unexpected spur of the moment time.
2007-01-26 07:46:10
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answer #4
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answered by gypsy g 7
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It all depends on how much you like this woman. It seems like she has lots of things going on in her life and it’s not only the busy schedule. Maybe, she’s just got out of the previous relationship and just wants to slow down a bit. If you push it too hard she might slip away. So I think it’s all up to you. If you really into that woman, you’d rather be patient. Every woman really wants to have someone to trust and rely on. Sometimes it takes time to prove that you’re the one. But make sure that you communicate with her via email or over the phone regularly and she updates you on what’s going on with her life. You don’t need a woman who dates dozens of guys, so make sure that you’re the only one. Anyway, if you don’t want to wait, then try to find something easier. There are so many options out there. Good luck.
2007-01-26 08:02:54
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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Sometimes it is true we all seem to have too much to do and find it hard to find time to spend with our social life. But honestly, I am a busy woman and I always find a way to be able to spend with the man I love. Whenever we put a relationship on the back burner, and so our partner ends up feeling neglected and unappreciated, no matter how a person tries to understand, this is very hurtful. Sounds to me as if she just is not that into you and is using this as an excuse to not spend that much time with you. Take the hint and stop sitting at home waiting around for her. Good luck to you!
2007-01-26 07:47:01
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answer #6
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answered by pictureshygirl 7
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Yeah, I think you definitely did the right thing and that fact that you said you are willing to be patient should tell her how much she means to you and in response, might MAKE time for you. I would give it a few months, but if something better comes along, you don't have any commitment here. Good Luck!
2007-01-26 08:27:35
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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Yeah, I think you definitely did the right thing and that fact that you said you are willing to be patient should tell her how much she means to you and in response, might MAKE time for you. I would give it a few months, but if something better comes along, you don't have any commitment here. Good Luck!
2007-01-26 07:43:12
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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You dont seem desperate, you seem like a nice guy who knows what he wants. The only thing is make sure that you dont get hurt in this....if she wants to date you that badly, then she should find some time in her schedule to fit you in. It could as simple as dinner...she has to eat right?
Make sure you speak with her about what it is that she wants and sees for you two - so that you're not waiting patiently forever.
2007-01-26 07:45:08
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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You dont owe her anything. You can wait, sure, but dont wait and do NOTHING. Date other girls too. You are NOT exclusive and it is NOT wrong for you to date other people meanwhile.
If she happens to climb out of the abyss of her schedule, than you can take it from there. Granted you havent found some one more interesting by that point in time. But dont ever "officially" wait for her by sitting at home twidling your fingers. As long as you are exclusively boyfriend and girlfriend, you are just casual friends..or even acquainteces from what it sounds like.
Besides that...you will defintely regret it if you let her schedule dictate your life.
2007-01-26 07:45:32
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answer #10
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answered by bluestar_dreamsx 3
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