My daughter and I had just attended my niece's wedding. I guess the experience had too big of an impact on my daughter, because now she is persistant of being married by the time the year is over. This is a problem since she is only 16 years old! I've tried everything to convince her that in this society, she is too young to get married. I'm getting very worried, though, because recently I saw a wedding dress (not my late wife's. That's still in the attic) hanging in her room, and she is always wearing a gold ring. I don't know where she got these, and she won't tell me! She doesn't even have a boyfriend. Can anybody give me advice before the inevitable happens?
2007-01-26 05:31:12 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
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2007-01-26 11:15:55 · answer #1 · answered by JuliusRomans 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess maybe she is in her fantasy realm. Maybe she is just curious what it was like to be married or anything. Maybe she wanted to Know your reaction if she were to be married young. The best thing you can do is talk to her about it. Explain to her that she is too young and that you willing to help her and support her if she make the decision. Knowing that she can have a father accepting that. Kids can be very rebellious if the parent were like "oh no not my daughter ...she is too young!" Best choice is sit down and talk to her in a very calm way and listen to her. You can always give the feedback of pro sand cons of being married. Give her the insights of what its like. Find someone who had been through it before to talk to her. Or look up the Internet on young marriage.
I hope this is the best answer for you! it is the best I can try to help you.
Good Luck!
2007-01-26 13:40:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell her marriage isn't a game or a phase or something that she can quit after getting bored in a relationship.
Marriage is about devotion, dedication, intellectual maturity, committment of love between the two individuals, and financial stability.
Ask her how is she going to support herself, her baby(ies), and her husband if she decide to get marry. Working with a minimum wage is not enough to pass by. And working as a stripper or a prostitute is DEFINITELY NOT AN OPTION. She will need a career inorder to succeed in life. In order to do that, she has to go to college....Now, how is she be able to do that if she gets married with a baby? How would she be able to find time to accomplish of her goal?
Make some senses into her. She will listen to you!
Good luck!
2007-01-26 13:45:02 · answer #3 · answered by Infinite 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe getting married isn't the real problem? Something else could be going on and this is the way to get attention. YOu spoke of your late wife. There is no mom in the home, maybe your daughter is lonely and the thought of a romantic wedding is appealing because she'd be the main person whom all pay attention to.
2007-01-26 13:38:00 · answer #4 · answered by VW 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You daughter may be living in a dream world and if I were you I'd be very careful. But remember she is only 16, she can't get married without your permission. Also its a stage, every teenage girl at one point get these marriage ideas in their head. (I drove my mom nuts when I did). The best thing you can do for your daughter right now is just encourage honesty. You don't want her going out and trying to find a future husband (an older man), who will convince her to marry him.
Good luck and take care!
2007-01-26 13:40:44 · answer #5 · answered by Chrystal 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get a book or download some wedding budgets, work up the cost of her dream wedding, and when it totals over $20,000, tell her she'll need to work X number of years at minimum wage to save $20K. Then ignore the whole thing,
As the father, you can always remove the dress and ring. You're the parent.
2007-01-26 13:37:43 · answer #6 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
she doesn't have a boy friend?....I think she is just creating some sort of a fantasy for herself,
You are the parent here though, you gotta get a handle on this and demand to know what the ring is abouit and what the dress is about, you have to find that out.
she clearly has been through a trauma losing her mom and needs you to be a parent to her now, maybe she needs some help...good luck dad, never easy.
2007-01-26 13:38:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She should be advised 1st to complete her education. If she diverts her attention towards education / studies then her ideas about marriage will slow down. If she starts taking much interest in education then she may forget this issue for a long time.
Please just ask / advice / convince her for studies only. Promise her that if gets excellent grades then she will be / get married very soon.
2007-01-26 13:40:14 · answer #8 · answered by My Loves and Respects to All 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She had a great time at the wedding and she does not realize that marriage is just not about the wedding day...that it is a life comittement with ups and downs and a lot of compromising.
2007-01-26 13:35:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
this may sound cheesy but maybe you could have her talk to some people who got married young and have them tell her how hard it is and that she could be making a big mistake. she could talk to a trusted counselor. talk to her teachers maybe they know about a boyfriend she has that you are not aware of. good luck.
2007-01-26 13:40:20 · answer #10 · answered by just me 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's very clear that this is not a wish, only something that she wants now, but then... her marriage will be somthing bad, she will divorce, i think. it's just some "crisis" of her. really, she's too young for founding her real love. you gotta explain her.
2007-01-26 13:41:03 · answer #11 · answered by ilovephotographyandmusic 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋