I'm wondering why SOME OF YOU (not all, I know!) are so hard on working mom's?
Here are some of the things I've heard:
Working mom's miss thier child's firsts-How do you know that won't miss your child's firsts when you step away to go to the store, etc.?
Working mom's call you un-educated-most of the SAHM's I know are highly educated and intelligent
A stranger raises your kids-a person that my child sees everyday isn't a stranger if I have thourougly checked them out
So that you can further understand my point of view, here is my deal-I work full time and my son stays with my sister and her two children. I spend all my free time with my son. I love my job and worked hard to get where I'm at and I REFUSE to feel guilty about the accomplishments and the choices I've made. That being said, I hope to soon be in a position to stay at home with my son, because although my work is extremely important to me, my son is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing in this world to me. I do resent the guilt trip.
2007-01-26 04:26:18 · 36 answers · asked by DontQuestionMe 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Because women hate women. Women have huge egos, are incredibly judgmental, believe their way is the only (and better) way to do everything, and pull each other down by doing all the backtalking and gossiping. You can see it starting in elementary school and it only gets worse as we get older.
2007-01-26 05:10:39 · answer #1 · answered by chnchita 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been on both sides of your question. I think that stay at home moms are great and I also think that working moms are great. I on the other hand am a stay at home mom. I am also going back to school to further my education so I can join the work force again. I know that every mother loves their children and its hard being torn between the two because both sides are not easy. I do not feel guilty because I stay at home, I also have a job to do every day just like working moms do. I can see your point about working and spending time with your son. All I have to say is if you are comfortable with what you do then do it cause you are the one that has to make the decisions in your life and you are doing what is best for your family.
2007-01-26 05:42:51 · answer #2 · answered by BJKG_2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a SAHM and I don't knock the working mom, I have friends that work and put their children in daycare and it doesn't bother me. Me on the other hand just couldn't do it. Daycares are very costly and wouldn't be worth it if I worked full time paying for daycare. I am planning on eventually going back to work and getting a part time night job therefore I can still stay home with my son. If it works for you and your family it doesn't make you bad parents or people.
Being that my son stays home with me doesn't mean that he will have developemental problems. It doesn't mean that I stay home all day long! We get out a lot and I have friends that are SAHM's. I don't understand how people could say that!
I just really feel that children really need their mother and or father at least the first year of their life. Your lucky that you have family close by because I don't. I just couldn't leave my son with someone I personally don't know, even if I checked them out to the fullest I still don't know them and neither would my son. They eventually get the hang of it because they will be dropped off everyday. I just couldn't imagine being away from my son 8-9 hours a day and having someone else take care of him. I'm not saying that none of that is hard on the working mom's mind because Im sure it is. You can't put a price on the welfare or raising of your child. Now this is just me and my feelings but it doesn't mean I have anything against working moms. You shouldn't feel guilty because Im sure your son is happy, healthy and well taken care of....Your lucky he can be with family......
2007-01-26 04:57:28 · answer #3 · answered by KDB 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't judge people like that, whether working or not, we all have our hands full. Why do you care what other people think. I've chosen to leave the work force to stay at home and work with my child of 15 months by my side and 3 teenagers now so I don't miss anything. I wouldn't have it any other way! My child won't go to daycare and will not be raised by a stranger. This is going to make her a better person. Good Luck!
2007-01-26 08:30:02 · answer #4 · answered by jenniferjotheos 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing like that offends me. People who are unintelligent don't understand the full JOB of being a house wife or stay at home mom. I just tell people I work part-time and keep my children when I'm not having to work. As for a term, stay at home working mom sounds good to me :) Seems like Zorro has an arch nemesis!
2016-05-24 02:06:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been both a stay at home and a working mum (I'm english we don't have moms here) I think you are talking about a more fundamental aspect of human behaviour than child care. For some reason people think they have a right to make judgements about how other people choose to live. We see it on yahoo answers all the time don't we, judgement questions and answers on almost every aspect of life.
Make your choices, don't feel guilty about them, you must live as it suits you to live, if other people can't cope with that then that is there problem. Ignore them, pity them, but don't be affected by them. If we were all just happy to let everybody else get on with what they needed to do and just got on with what we needed to do I'm sure the world would be a much happier place.
2007-01-26 05:43:35 · answer #6 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been on both ends. I was a working mother for my sons' first years and missed out on alot of firsts. My job and my single hood made it hard to be there for my sons'. Now I am remarried and I am a SAHM w/ my two daughters', out of necessity, as well as want. It is hard to afford daycare for 4 children and still maintain a pycheck. I totally believe that no matter what your 'outside' job is, that as long as you make your 'home' job your priority, then you are doing the best thing for your child/ren. As long as you are doing what makes your home life thrive, whether it be, working outside the home b/c you have to, or b/c it fulfills you. And you are making sure your child/ren are being properly taken care of and you spend the quality time w/ them, b/c I know SAHM that spend the quantity time and not the quality time w/ their kids, then you are doing exactly what is needed. And don't let anyone else tell ya differently!! ;)
2007-01-26 05:01:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I love my son to death. I am a working Mom and in a way I kind of have to be, most of the time now a days you need two incomes coming into the house.
I used to think that I want to be a stay-at-home mom. I miss my son so much during the day, but I want to work. I don't love my job, but I want to have some extra money and get a chance to interact with others, and use my degree that I have worked so hard for.
I think that it is great for those that stay at home with their kids. I think that it is one of the most difficult jobs to do! I also think that being a stay-at-home mom doesn't give you or your child an opprotunity to develop and grow in themselves and life.
When you are a stay-at-home mom I think that you ("you" being general) can make you be more overprotective of your kid. I am only speaking from what I have seen, from other women that have been stay-at-home moms and friends that grew up in this environment.
2007-01-26 04:53:10 · answer #8 · answered by sweetybaby 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If your not trying to offend anyone they why are you attacking the SAHM?
I understand that not everyone is lucky enough to be a stay at home mom financially- my family cant that is why i made sure to get a job where i can take my baby with me. That way I am the one raising her.........not my sister, not my mom, not some daycare, me. Your kids should be the most important thing in your life (after your hubby) your job and career should come afterwards.
And also nice try onthe point that a stay at home mom would "miss" the firsts because the kids go EVERYWHERE with the mom, includeing the grocery store. Its a lot less likely to miss it when you have your kids day and night then a mom who is working and not anywhere around.
I think its a jealousy issue that working moms have towards SAHM's.
2007-01-26 04:44:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
I am a sahm and I feel that mothers make choices by what is best for them and there familys. I don't feel that working mothers are bad mothers because they work that is there choice or in some cases it is what they have to do in order to raise there family. I had a great job before I had my daughter but after I had her my husband and I discussed it and a majority of my pay would go to daycare, and the cost of me working(car payment, gas, eating out(lunch), etc) so in our case it just made more since for me to stay home. Basically everybody does what they need to do or want to do for there family and I have respect for working moms because they do a lot and they are under respected(although being a sahm isn't easy either)
2007-01-26 04:37:01 · answer #10 · answered by mdoud01 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i understand completely. I have been on both sides, so I can present a full picture here. As a working mom, i did miss out on SOME time with my child. As I had more children, i decided to work in the daycare so i could still pop in on my kids when necessary. i am the type of person who needs to work, not only for the finacial part of it, but it's just part of who I am. After the birth of my 3rd child, daycare costs were skyrocketing, even with me working in a daycare with them, forcing me to stay at home and work from there.
I do enjoy spending lots of time with my babies, but I also love to work. Some women just think they are the mothers of the year because they dedicate all of their time to the kids. I believe that you can have the best of both worlds and still be the worlds best mom.
Don't listen to anybody who says otherwise, I'm sure you are doing what is best for you and your son. As am I.
2007-01-26 04:36:55 · answer #11 · answered by mama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋