how do you build confidence?

Question

i need some advice/support off you guys. I dont know how to make myself feel better. Ive started to join a kickboxing class which i find nerve wracking. I have been temporary promoted which is stressing me out. I am sad as i have no bloke yet if im feeling this im probs giving out wrong vibes to people in the first place.

I feel im being very closed in and not letting anything out of my personality to anyone even though i am fun and friendly. I feel im letting off wrong vibes to people and thats why they dont approach me as much. I dont seem to get know many of the peeps in my office due to my shyness. I want to be fashionable with my clothes but every time i go in a changing room i feel fat. What can i do to build my confidence up as everytime i try something ruins it again

Answer 1

I used to suffer from a lack of confidence as I hated speaking to groups of people. Although I too had a brill sense of humour and was friendly I had never been the "soul of the Party." I joined a public speaking club who teach you how to undertake confident speaking in easy steps and cheaply. Now I can speak to all and sundry with ease, confidence and knowing that I will make good impressions. This ability alone will help socially and within work try it. They can be found under the heading of Association of Speakers Clubs

Answer 2

Ooo - trial by fire I'm afraid. Confidence-boosting is by doing things which may or may not go right (hence when it goes right, your confidence improves because you succeeded at something that could have failed).

Maybe the first steps is to go out on a night with a few friends, find a small group of lads, and do a "cold-call" - just start chatting to one of them. Men love the attention as much as women. Don't go in for the kill (unless you've hit upon Mr Right by pure fluke) and don't try to flirt - just general small-talk, but get used to making conversation with strangers. After a while, you can go further little-by-little; get a phone number or two, and so on.

That initial step will be the hardest though. As you get used to people paying you attention, you'll find speaking in public a little easier, being around people easier...and then you won't have to even try - it'll come naturally.

You shouldn't be scared though - new things (job, people etc) should be looked forward to - imagine the potential that you can get out of these new avenues that you're pursuing!

Oh, and forget everything that's shattered your confidence before - start afresh, and if something does go wrong, analyse at what point did it go wrong and avoid doing it again. The times that go wrong are more valuable than the times that go right.

Good luck!

Answer 3

You have to feel better about yourself... How to do that?
Make yourself proud - How? Where is your passion?
Like kids? Become a Big Brother, Animals - Volunteer at the animal shelter or ZOO
Why should you feel good and confident- if you are lazy - make the change in your life and enjoy!

Answer 4

Get involved with a debate group or a speaking group. Having to verbally express yourself and argue a point can really build your confidence .

Answer 5

Building your knowledge of life gives you confidence, which is why people tend to get more confident as they get older.
Try to take things less seriously and don't be a fashion victim.
Develop your own style. Be your own person. If people don't like who you are, they are probably wrong. Most people tend to like pleasant folk.

Answer 6

dont care what others think just do you be yourself and be around ppl that dont bring you down try to be around postive ppl