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My niece is due to start primary school in september yet she is still in nappies and refuses to go anywhere near a potty or toilet. I am asking for advice for my sister who doesn't know what to do.
She has tried many times to train her, using bribes, reward charts etc.
She puts her in normal knickers and her daughter just pees herself everywhere, doesn't seem to notice or care that she has done it. When she needs a poo she goes into a corner to hide.
She has asked the health visitor and doctor but they are not very helpful, just suggesting things she has already done.
THe longest she has done is 3 weeks of just peeing everywhere before she gave up and put the nappies backon.
We know the little girl is not incontinent as she can hold it in when people are around and go into a corner to do it. And she doesn't have special needs, she is very intelligent in most respects.
Is there anything we can do? Will she never use a potty?
By the way she is 31/2 when she starts school she will be 4.

2007-01-26 02:05:53 · 4 answers · asked by cigaro19 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting Toddler & Preschooler

4 answers

Your sister sounds like she i having a tough time with your little niece! I dont know her so am only guessing but perhaps your niece has picked up on the control she has over your sister with this? In this case, your sister needs to get control back. She could try taking something of your nieces away that she loves doing. It could be an activity or television etc Sit her down and tell her until she can start using the toilet or potty this wont be given back. She will soon learn that she has to cooperate to get her favourite thing/s back. It might take a while, your niece has got used to winning this battle and children can be stubborn if they think it can get them what they want in the end. Perhaps this is why this have never worked before if your sister gave in? I understand why she would give in, her washing machine basket must have always been full! Has something happened to frighten her, stress can often come out in strange ways with children and sometimes they cant express there feelings and worries therefore this can be how it manifests. She could be seeking attention. If your sister gets cross with her then as far as a child is concerned being shouted at is better than no attention at all. When she has an accident then deal with it briskly but calmly. Maybe she could be reward with a special mummy and me outing or time? If she is craving the attention she will learn that using the loo rather than wetting herself earns her special time for her and mum (or dad if thats who she is craving attention from). If this doesnt work then your sister should take her to the doctors and have her referred to a behavioural therapist for help. She needs to be persistent if the doctor is unhelpful. I wouldnt worry about her starting school, it might actually help if she sees other kids using the toilet and the teachers there will help. Does she go to nursery? If not it might be worth thinking about, the nurses there are trained and can offer advice.I hope some of this has helped x

2007-01-26 23:22:00 · answer #1 · answered by British*Bird 5 · 0 0

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2016-06-02 15:52:57 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0 0

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2016-04-15 09:12:44 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

hey, well i am facing that problem too... my daughter is nearly 4, and although she doesnt wet herself, she holds it in all day which worrys me so i end up putting a nappy on her.
I have spoke to several people and they all say the same.. she will do it in her own time.
I know how worrying it is, but all kids develop and do things at diferent ages, so tell your sister not to worry, your niece will learn and pick it up in her own time, just as my daughter will

2007-01-27 07:21:32 · answer #4 · answered by marie s 3 · 0 0

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