I have a small bed and it is really crowded with her, me, and my husband. She will only sleep with us in our bed. I am tired of getting kicked at night by her and waking up sore because I have no room to sleep. I love her but I need my rest. I am always tired and cranky because I get no sleep. She will not sleep anywhere but with us in our room. And there is no room in my bedroom to put her bed too. I barely have room for my bed and it is small. Would I be a bad mom if I just put her in her bed when it is bedtime and shutting her door and letting her cry? I see no other solution. I have tried EVERYTHING else. I love my daughter so much but I can only take so much.
2007-01-26 02:05:17 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
its all about boundries. my daughter did the same thing as yours for awhile. Finally, I did just what you suggest and put her in her room and let her cry herself to sleep. For the first few nights it was a pain. But, now she only comes and sleeps with us when shes not feeling well.
2007-01-26 02:14:42 · answer #1 · answered by jwk227 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
This is what we did after we got this advice from her doctor. We let her sleep with us one more night. Then we told her because she's such a big girl now we have a special surprise for her. She can sleep in mom and dad's room, but on the floor next to the bed in her own sleeping bag/pallet of blankets. Mom and dad are right there if she needs them. She slept that way for a week, then we moved her sleeping bag closer to the door. As we moved the bag closer to the door, one of us would sack out with her, but not in the same bag or blankets. Slowly week by week we moved closer to her door and bed. Then in a few weeks, we put her in her bed and we slept on the floor next to her bed for a couple nights. We did the nightlight thing for her to. Special stuffed animals "to protect her" also helped. Within a couple months she was sleeping in her bed.
I know it's hard. I've been there with THREE of em..lol. Just be patient and let her know you and dad are always there.
2007-01-26 02:23:36 · answer #2 · answered by Melanie A 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are going to have to put your foot down as hard as it may be. Put her in own bed and shut or put a gate up so she can not get out. She will mostly likely cry, but do not give in, because once you do she will through a fit every night. She will know that if she cries enough, mommy will come get me. I see this all the time with other kids and my own. Be strong. Make sleeping in her big girl bed, a big deal. Praise her, let her know she is a big girl. The younger the better, start know.
2007-01-26 02:23:17 · answer #3 · answered by poohbear_cmw 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
In watching show like Nanny 911 and Super Nanny, I see this is a common problem. If my wife had it her way, it would be my problem to. There are times when I go out of town, or my daughter is sick that my wife lets her sleep with us, but bedtimes get difficult for a day or two after we switch back to making her sleep in her own room. It will be easier to nip it in the bud now than when she is 5 or even 7(which I have seen from friends of mine.) My wife can't stand to hear her crying and screaming, but if you stick to your guns it gets easier and easier and the length of time for the crying gets shorter and shorter. Routine is everything go through the same routine every night. I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and we start the bed time wind down at about 7:00pm with her in bed by 8:30pm. Wind down means no rough housing. We enjoy playing with her toys in her room(she likes playing zoo), then we get the pajamas on and resume quiet games, then brush teeth and read a couple stories. When it is time I put her in the bed and talk calmly and quietly about the things she might like to dream about. (What color her bike will be in the dream, will it have a bell, horn or a basket to carry her favorite stuffed animal, etc.) I tell her she needs to sleep in her own bed to sleep better and help her grow, and get smarter. This started early in her life and in the beginning my wife would have me set a time for how long we would let her cry before she could go in and comfort her. I would say 20 minutes if she is still crying and carrying on we would go in and re explain that it was bed time without picking her up and talk to her a while. Now we are at the point that most night she goes down without a peep, but sometimes she might cry for 5 minutes( a very painful 5 minutes for mom and dad). But you are the parent you make the rules not your child. Perhaps you could start by putting her in her room after she falls a sleep then waking her up in the morning and make a big deal about how proud you are of her for sleeping in her own room. You can do it, but it take determination.
2007-01-26 02:31:53 · answer #4 · answered by thefoamguy60050 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Mine is 2o months old and I had the exact same problem. This is what I did, and it worked.
For about 10-12 nights, every night we went to her room, I put her in her bed, I slept on my blanket on the floor for 30-45 min holding her hand, playing with her hair until she goes to sleep, then I leave the room. Finally she got used to sleep alone in her bed. Now I think my right arm is about 2" longer, because of stretch, but it worth. Good luck.
2007-01-26 02:29:46 · answer #5 · answered by Nikki 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend that went through the same thing she couldn't put her daughters bed in her room and her daughter wouldn't sleep in her own room. when she tryed everything else she took her to her room one night and asked her what was so scary. she told her that she had seen a snake in her room. she got her a night light and now she sleeps in her own room. if you have tryed a night light, asking her why she wont sleep in her room and/or getting her a special friend (teddy bear or something) to sleep with her in her own room only, reading to her a book or two only if she sleeps in her own room, than yes i see nothing wrong with letting her cry. you should check on her if she crys more than 15 mins though. she could be afraid of something.
Hope this helps.
2007-01-26 02:22:40 · answer #6 · answered by Rhylie and Paiyden 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the poster who suggested asking her what it is that she dislikes about sleeping in her bed or like about yours. And here's the thing - if she is too young to understand or coherently answer the question, she is not a little girl yet, she is still growing out of the baby stage and you need to work with her on those terms.
Its rough having a baby, but its even rougher being a baby. You have all the power in this relationship, you have all the understanding, and you are the only one who can try to reconcile both sets of needs. Putting your needs over her's won't make you more of a parent.
2007-01-26 03:08:10 · answer #7 · answered by Kahuna Burger 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have twin boys, age 3, and when they were two we bought them their own beds. They are low enough so that they won't hurt themselves if they fall out and we got them at Ikea. Before the beds we had a plain mattress on the floor.
This is how we weaned them out of our bed. First make a list of things to do before bed. Go through the process with them, creating a habit out of it. I sit down on the bed and read them a few books and say its time for bed.
At first we would lay down with the baby in their bed until they were asleep, then I went to my bed. At first the babys would wake up in the night and come to our bed. I would simply bring them back and lay down again until they were sleeping and go to my bed again. It takes time and every child is different but it will work. Just be patient.
Also, they used to go to bed with a stuffed toy, it comforts them and they have something to hold onto at night. Find out whats her favorite toy and they may help too.
If you put her in her room and close the door, she will think she did something wrong and relate going to bed as punishment.
2007-01-26 02:24:17 · answer #8 · answered by Ron G 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just like SuperNanny...
You must put her in her bed each and every time she leaves it. On the show, this can go on for literally hours - the kid will sometimes get up over 50 times. Anyway, if you consistently put her back (oh yes, the 1st time you tuck her in, the 2nd you say goodnight, all subsequent times you say nothing at all), eventually she will learn that she has no choice but to stay in her own bed. You may have to do this for several days in a row, but it should get better each night and soon she will stay the 1st time you put her down.
2007-01-26 02:18:19 · answer #9 · answered by Irish Eyes 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he takes a snooze you should attempt making that shorter and formerly interior the day. you also could have an pastime interior the previous due afternoon that wears his little self out. LOL A warmth bathtub and the persisted worry-free of the e book at bedtime, alongside with a distinct bedtime ought to do the trick. little ones do properly with a worry-free; yet, from time to time they're going to throw you a curve. good luck and God bless.
2016-10-16 03:27:00 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried explaining to her that babies sleep with mommy and daddy and big girls sleep in their own beds. She is now a big girl and she needs to sleep there. Explain to her that you will lay down with her to help her to make the adjustment, but she needs to start sleeping in her own room. Provide a night light for her, don't shut her door completely because when she wakes in the middle of the night, she will be afraid and this will make her want to be with you all over again.
Reward her for sleeping in her own bed like big girls do. Make a deal with her that if she can sleep in her room by herself for a month, you will give her something she's been wanting. Don't make is something huge, just something that will make her happy. Remember to keep your end of the deal though since she will remember if you don't!
Good luck!!!
2007-01-26 02:17:10 · answer #11 · answered by Nicole 3 · 0⤊ 4⤋