I work second shift 4PM to midnight. My husband is home with our 4 children, ages 8-15. Every night my house looks like its been trashed. No one will put anything away, dishes are left with food stuck to them. I have tried "striking" but they are content to live like pigs. I clean a school, I do not feel like doing a major overhaul to my house [every night] after 8 hours of cleaning.
I have begged, pleaded, given positive feed back, etc to no avail.
2007-01-26 01:44:20 · 5 answers · asked by Taners 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If there is no clean dishes they wash only what is needed. I am ready to pull my hair out or leave, maybe both
2007-01-26 02:06:45 · update #1
Oh boy... Well, don't go home until you KNOW it's cleaned. Tell them to call you when the house is clean every night so you can come home. I'm serious, I would find somewhere to go (friend's house, parent's house--if they live near you). Make it a habit that if the house is not clean, you are not coming home... It may take a few nights somewhere else, but after a few times of this, they'll probably be too scared of you not coming home, so they'll clean up... This is the only suggestion I can leave. I hope it works!
Also, they will clean the house the first few times and resort to it being messy again, so I would change the things I'm holding against them, for instance: 1. Don't come home (like I said),
2. Don't buy groceries
3. If it gets to the point where they WILL NOT clean, how about this... DO NOT PAY THE BILLS! Sure, you'll have late fee's, but if they don't have to do their part, then you don't have to do yours... they'll get the point when the phone/tv, lights, etc. do not work anymore... lol, kinda funny when I think about it!
GOOD LUCK and get creative! They'll get the point!
2007-01-26 02:10:37 · answer #1 · answered by Tasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hire a cleaning company. No more allowances, new clothes or anything else so you can afford the extra expense. Don't tell them what you are doing, just do it . You need to make a BIG impression so they learn a lesson. I finally got through when my daughter needed a top for school and I took her to the thrift shop instead of the mall. The light bulb went off in her head and started helping around the house. To make sure she meant it I kept the company for a month after her awaking. She continued to help and has appreciated my view point. Your husband needs to be shot for not being your partner and making sure things get done and helping out himself. Maybe he needs to lose privledges too, like beer, golf games, whatever he likes.
2007-01-26 10:13:30 · answer #2 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is tough. It is a respect issue. They know you will clean and as such they simply have to wait you out. So you have to make certain that they understand that this is unacceptable to you.
Solution:
Make your husband understand and get him on your team. This is going to be hard as he is the real problem here and not your kids. Your kids are taking their cues from him. SO you have to play some serious hard ball with him. Let him know that you cannot live this way and that he will have to change or he will have to go. This seems harsh, but it comes down to him being compassionate about your having to do all the cleaning and respecting you enough to ensure that you are not the only one having to do all the cleaning. If he cannot find it in himself to love and respect you enough to fix the situation then you need to find someone to make will.
Good Luck!
2007-01-26 10:26:09 · answer #3 · answered by rcbricker33 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If kicking their lazy sorry filthy A** didnt work,check into a hotel/motel for a week or so. Dont go home! go to work from there. Or if possible hire the sexiest male maid you can find and have him clean the house while your husband and you are there stare at him while he cleans and maybe your husband will get the point. If neither one of these methods work, Dirvorce his a** there is NO resaon for anybody to live in filth
2007-01-26 09:58:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when there are no clean dishes to eat off of and no clean clothes to wear, I am sure they will have a change of heart. No beggin and pleading - it is simple - this is the way it is going to be. As members of a family, all must do their part to support the family unit, end of story. Create a list of daily chores, assign names and let them know under no uncertain terms, they must be completed. If everyone did a little, then you wouldn't have to do alot!
2007-01-26 09:52:28 · answer #5 · answered by buggsnme2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋