I have know a girl as an aquaintance for quite some time as we have somewhat been in the same circle of friends, but have a 5 year age difference. I was just divorced in March of last year and her fience ended their engagement in July. In October, we started talking more, hanging out together, which progressed to a some dinners out. She invited me to her parents for Thanksgiving, due to my work schedule not allowing me to spend it with mine. December led to us hosting a party at my house followed by celebrating her birthday together. The night of her birthday (where she turned down offers to go out with other guys) she stayed at my place, but on the couch, an arraingment that followed for a couple weeks on my nights off. It then progressed to her staying during the week and we finally kissed. We have since evolved into an sexual relationship with her practically living with me and doing all the couples things together, but she says that she is not ready for a relationship. What is up?
2007-01-26 01:24:18 · 20 answers · asked by robbybare364 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There are 2 possible reasons for this
1. She is having trouble getting over her fiance, and knows that you recently divorced so she is giving you both time to heal. There is no point in getting into a relationship if you arent fully over your previous relationship, especially if she sees something serious.
2. She is on the rebound and has attached herself to you for moral and sexual support. She is in the process of moving on but cannot do it alone and single.
I think it is the first suggestion since you guys waited a little bit before having sex. Also because she turned downs other guys. This means she wasnt just ready to jump on to the next guy who showed interest.
My advice, hang in there and be patient. Women are complicated. Good luck.
2007-01-26 01:32:29 · answer #1 · answered by stacey b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she isnt ready and doesnt want a relationship right now due to the breaking off of the engagement and you just being divorced and all. Why not ask her if she is looking for a relationship instead of wondering what's up
2007-01-26 01:32:54 · answer #2 · answered by cuttie1972 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She seems to want the relationship without the stress of calling it a relationship. If the label of a formal relationship is there she is thinking underneath that it will fail. Take it slow and just enjoy the way things are. No stress of the label of a formal relationship - while this is exactly what it is. Take things at her pace and enjoy your time together. Good Luck
2007-01-26 01:33:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds pretty much like a real relationship to this old guy, other than actually admitting to be committed. She certainly sounds somewhat confused and may just need some time to admit what is really going on with the two of you. If her ex boyfriend just ended their engagement she must be somewhat fearful, so please allow this woman time to grieve and heal. Best of luck to you both.
2007-01-26 01:39:09 · answer #4 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be patient. She obviously has feelings for you, but is worried. She has given her heart to someone before, and it was broken. She doesn't want to do that again. That is why she has said she is not ready. If there is no official commitment, nothing was really lost. That is what she keeps telling herseelf. So sit back, relax, and let her know how much she means to you, and that you are there for her. But DO NOT bombard her with your feelings. Be calm and colected.
2007-01-26 01:32:01 · answer #5 · answered by Linka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh... maybe she is just fulfilling her sexual needs through you... At first it sounded as if she loves/loved you but that second to last sentence threw me for a loop. Maybe you should sit down and talk about it. See if there is any possibility of there being a future between the two of you.
2007-01-26 01:30:44 · answer #6 · answered by Lixender 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at first, pals with advantages. somebody basically approximately constantly gets harm . you're saying he's a women guy, if he truly became in love with you. could he be attempting as much as now yet another lady, i does no longer think of so. the two you're saying to him, which you fairly want dedication wherein case a dating. or you do no longer decide to be his bit on the area.. then you definately say, you have a girl buddy and decide to instruct him down gently. that's complicated issues.
2016-11-27 19:52:24 · answer #7 · answered by merriweather 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it seems *** if she is scared to get her heart broken again and is just not ready. She probably does not want to ruin this relationship that she has with you, but I dont get why she is at your house so much. She mauy be misleading you. You should have a long personal talk with her. Ask her where the future stands with you two.
2007-01-26 01:33:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Shes not ready for commitment. What you have now allows her to get everything she wants, and drop you if something else comes along.
2007-01-26 01:28:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey dude, don't get attached then hurt cuz if she's not ready for a relationship, she's just scared to make a comittment and not ready for seriousness and just in it for fun maybe, don't get messed up wtih stuff just to get broken heart in the end
2007-01-26 01:33:02 · answer #10 · answered by shine_on 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋