I have been in an online relationship with my partner now for nearly 3 years,I am in the uk and hes in usa,We planned for nearly a year to meet & the date was nov 2006,I had the tickets,packed & ready to go,3 days before i was due to fly out he said maybe i should delay my flight,to be more clearer the week or so leading up to that i was just excited running about getting hair done,nails and all that you can imagine,I was flying from glasgow to dublin to chicago & basically thought everything was ok,the week before he was real distant & we argued,had second thoughts(on both parts),but thats nerves right?? or so i thought,i flew there anyway & called him,honest to god thinking he would come get me,no he tells me he thought i wasnt coming & decides to drive to texas to see his sister,anyway...i go fly there,get flight back next day as couldnt believe it,were still talking but can you get over something like that & trust & love that person again???the subject has never came up again?
2007-01-25 15:44:59 · 24 answers · asked by alanis 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow love, you must feel so hurt. I bet he's probably hiding something, or someone. He could be "ashamed" about the whole online dating. Soooo many people still think its taboo. I can't tell you to get over it and never talk to him again, because believe me I know how hard it is to just stop. You've basically adjusted your whole life around this "relationship". I think it's about time that you demand answers. Then start to think about what's truly best for you, even if it doesn't involve him. It really does seem as if he's going out of his way to avoid meeting you. I think you need to realize that if he wanted to meet you then he wouldn't of "gone to Texas" that time you went there. He may state that he loves you and wants to be with you, but if he isn't making the effort then he's not in it for the reasons you are. I think it's time you demand answers, if he doesn't deliver then let him go.
2007-01-25 16:03:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I think online relationships are just awful. Tell me about these guys. I have been talking to one for almost 3 years and all he does is tell me he is going to visit and that he has a ticket blah blah blah and I work my butt off cleaning and getting everything really nice for him and he doesnt show up. I have missed so many events waiting at the house for him to show up. Im afraid one of these times Im just going to stay angry and not get over it. Everytime it happens I stay angry longer and longer and it makes me question the whole relationship and if its worth all the pain. Everyone says he is hiding something and I dont want people to think im weak and lose respect for me because of some guy.
2007-01-25 15:52:56 · answer #2 · answered by ehrlich 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Diss the guy. He isn't worth your time... I think you should leave him before you see more of his other side... It seems that he's avoiding you or maybe insensitive and irresponsible. It could also be a lack of maturity, but I wouldn't know; I'm not the one who talked to him for 3 yrs. But a word of advice: even though you guys chatted for 3 yrs in cyberspace, he could be lying, about his identity, age, personality, etc. So take the way out before you crash over. Hope I helped, and I didn't mean to sound offensive or harsh. ;)
2007-01-25 15:52:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start looking for someone else.
All in all, you wasted time for 3 years...and he even avoided you when you came to see him. what type of relationship is that?
Go see around you in Dublin, date a great guy who's not a phantom on the internet.
Anyway, I bet u've never even seen his face. If it's a real "he" as well.
Run away from this freak.
2007-01-25 15:52:54 · answer #4 · answered by littlemunkay 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its too late to change the past, but I think it was a bad idea to fly anyways to the USA. You should have asked him why he wanted to delay, and if you haven't yet, ask him again. Let him know that you were hurt when he wouldn't get you. Maybe he's afraid that you won't like him once you meet. But definitely bring the subject up again.
2007-01-25 15:52:22 · answer #5 · answered by the_blue_violinist 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hell no, you waste all that time and effort to get everything taken care of to visit him. You guys discuss you still coming out there and from the sounds of it, I didn't hear either one of you decide not to do it, so he is just being a dumb ***. He isn't willing to make any sort of committment for you guys to be together, so I think personally, you just need to call it quits and go find someone who would rather be with you and gives you the assurance and signs they want to be with you.
2007-01-25 15:52:19 · answer #6 · answered by forealztho69 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm going to be honest here. I can't believe you are talking to him. Now I am a very forgiving person myself but, if I flew across the ocean to meet someone and they were not there to pick me up...they would be History!! If you want to continue to talk to him, he can fly to see you, but I'm betting he's hiding something or he's a real jerk that no American girl wants.
2007-01-25 16:15:27 · answer #7 · answered by jag 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he's married. I know others have said that he is ugly, weird, or whatever, but even if he is, he would have had nothing to lose by meeting you and letting you decide for yourself. He is a snake and you need to cut off all contact with him. If I were you, I would do some research and find out if he's married. Then, I'd call his wife and let her know what he is up to.
2007-01-25 16:02:54 · answer #8 · answered by schweetums 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Happened to a girl friend of mine. Shes american, but shes staying in asia right now for work. She flew all the way to the united kingdom for this guy, who didnt even wanna fly to meet her. He kept saying he would but he didnt. Anyway when she got there she slept at his cousins house and the next morning her clothes were gone , while she was away with him his cousins took her clothes, anyway she went back to asia and he came with her, but he was always so broke they kept fighting and he threw her cellphone at her. Wow.
Anyway I can safely say, when in doubt, DONT.
2007-01-25 15:51:13 · answer #9 · answered by tammy a 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like the person isn't who they say they are
too painful to for you to see in person, could actually not be the sex or gender or age group at all
I was burned like this once, but a friend had to find out. My friend pushed for me to let them talk to that person, flew out to meet them, and they were WAY older with kids no less than they had led on.
2007-01-25 15:59:06 · answer #10 · answered by voice_of_reason 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋