what will u do if 1 day u come to know that your mom is having an affair with some1?

Question

i got some letters,than my investigation starts and i come to know that i am not the daughter of my parents instead of my mom and that man who is writing all those letters
my dad dont know this fact
whay mom is also answering in very lovingly to that mans letter with all shayries etc
and that man is very cheap he is writing all vulgor things
how to face this situation
should i tell dad abt this?
i asked my mom whats all this i'll tell dad she said u want make ur parenst separate,you r the cause of every thing
friends plzzzzzzzzzz help me
i'll be highly obliged
thanks

Answer 1

I think you should keep silence.
If some day your father will come to know about the relationship between your mother and dat person, he'll decide wat he has to do,if the break-up comes then you wont be the cause,as your father knows the things.
n
If your father doesn't come to know the game,then no problem will arise,n life will go-on as it is going right now.
Meanwhile you can try to make your mother understand the importance of a peace full married life n her responsibilities towards you n your father n family.

Answer 2

If your mom's husband is not your real father and he thinks he is, then you have to beg your mom to tell him now. If not, then you tell him. That's it. It's going to happen anyway, so blow the lid off.

If your mom is having an affair, it is much simpler. Still hard to deal with but much simpler than the dad not knowing he's not your dad. If she's just writing letters and screwing around, talk to your mom very calmly and rationally and tell her you're uncomfortable with the situation. Be honest about how you feel, and see what she says. Ask her why she's having this relationship with this other guy. Listen to what she says. Talk it out like you would with a friend. Try not to judge her. And after you listen to her reasons, then go away and think about it all, and if you still cannot deal with it, tell her she has to tell your dad if she wants you to be comfortable. If you think telling your dad will solve anything, then do it; but I'd think carefully about that. This might be nothing. It might be just talking dirty. Give her some space at first, see what happens. IF they are having a real live love affair you dad probably already knows. And don't judge your mom about vulgar things. The problem here is that you're being hurt, and she's doing things to make you hurt and to hurt your dad. Vulgarity to you is lovey/sexy talk to them; if it makes her happy then mind your own business. The problem is not vulgarity; thinking that is just judging her for your own selfish reasons. The problem is emotional between you and your mom first, so talk to her calmly.

Answer 3

Now you know this fact that someone else is your real father but your present dad doesn’t know it so best thing is to keep shut. Whatever your mom did before her marriage or is doing now is definitely wrong but you don’t have to tell this to anyone, what I feel your present dad heart should not be broken as he had considered you as his daughter & at this age let him not get this shocking news that you are not his real daughter. After sometime you will get married & go to your husbands house but if you leave you parents home after bring rift between them then through out you life you will feel guilty for this. I can understand you feeling specially for you mom who is doing wrong if she still have relationship with this other man but better it will be for you to remain away from this controversy & any aggravation of this topic can be bad even for your future married life & you may face awkward questioning by your future husband & in-laws.

Answer 4

Ask yourself...do you want your father living a lie any longer? does he deserve this? was it your fault as your mom says if you weren't born yet or is it hers for lying all these years to your Dad and still doing so? If it was me I'd go to my Father and tell him of the letters and tell him you have confront your mother and her response. I can tell you this, any man can father a child but it takes a heck of a man to be a DAD! the only thing you'll cause is some truths from your mother that are long overdue to your Dad

Answer 5

if this is true, then i ask u to please sit and have a very open talk with ur mother to know the whole story, tell her u need to know because u too are involved as u would want to know who ur real father is.
and after that it is better for u to sit and think whether all ur effort to put things straight at this point will bring happiness or make things even more worse than what it is now.

try speaking to ur mom too, if she cooperates fine, otherwise u learn from her mistakes and try not commiting it urself.. so that if not anything, atleast u can be assured peace of mind in ur married life.

rest leave it to god and time to take care........

Answer 6

Well, some problem there. It is sad that you had to discover the identity of your father the hard way. It is none to comfortable to know that your biological father is a lecher of sorts. Hopefully your mother's husband, the man you knew as your real father before reading your mother's secret love letters, is different and good. Accept him as your real father.
About your mother, for a moment consider her as a woman and not just as your mother. She is prone to normal human failings. Her liaison with the other man probably stems from her sexual unfulfilment from your father. But she could have definitely done better, instead of cheating on your father. Anyway, you are not responsible for her actions. Let her wayward behaviour not have any influence on your life.
Complaining to your father might only complicate things for you and your family. But try as best as you can to dissuade her from her way of life.

Answer 7

You need to tell your dad. It is not your fault she did what she did. Always remember your parents love you, but the truth needs to come out. I am so sorry you are caught in the middle. Nobody should have to be stuck in the middle of a situation like that. Good luck.

Answer 8

Leave well enough alone when your old enough 2 leave ask your mom where your real dad is there's no sense in hurting the man that raised you I know from experience been thru it very painful learned from my grandma my dad the man that raised me told me as well but when I contacted my real dad he told me that he wasn't my father that my mom was lying so Good Luck 2 U

Answer 9

First of all,you did not cause anything.Your mom's affair did that. Tell your Dad. He deserves to know what you know. From there you just have to let your parents work things out. The important thing is not to blame yourself,even if your Mom tries to put it on you.

Answer 10

You mom is the one who is destroying the family, not you. What your mom is doing is wrong to your dad. If you know this is happening for sure, then he needs to be told. What you can do is talk to your mom about telling him. Tell her that you are hurt of what she is doing to your dad and you, tell her that you don't want to lose the both of them and let her know that she needs to tell him. Because, soon enough, he will find out.

Right now, the marriage is torn....it is best to let the worms out now, then later. Then they both need to seek marriage counseling as well.