How to heal a broken heart?

Question

I dated this guy for 11 months and i lived with him and his parents for 5 months, and yesterday his mom kicked me out so me and shawn had to break up, plus he abused me, so i had no choice but to move back to my parents house, but i dont even know if im staying here permanently because they are mad that i have to live here again. i may have to live a the abused womens shelter again. anyways its only been a day since i got broken up with and im not taking it so well. i feel so lonely and empty inside. i keep crying and i just cant bare with it anymore. how can i heal my broken heart? and its hard to let someone go that u loved so very much.

Answer 1

People may say no one ever died of a broken heart, but when you're suffering from one, it sure doesn't feel that way--at least initially. These suggestions may help you navigate the painfully troubled waters of a relationship that has ended.
Day 1
Instructions
•STEP 1: Breathe. All you can do is survive this first and difficult day. Take one day at a time.
•STEP 2: Give yourself permission to mourn. Call in sick at work, sleep all day, eat too much ice cream, sob.
•STEP 3: Congratulate yourself for being human: It is only when you open yourself to love that your heart can break.
•STEP 4: Develop and repeat a helpful mantra to get you through the initial shock and pain, such as "This too shall pass" or "I will survive."
Day 2
Instructions
•STEP 1: Reach out to a close friend or family member. It helps to share your thoughts with others.
•STEP 2: Watch a movie to distract yourself. Choose a comedy that has cheered you up in the past. Or watch a movie that's guaranteed to make you sob--it may surprise you how good that feels.
Week 1
Instructions
•STEP 1: Force yourself to go out even if you are feeling despondent. Take yourself out for a cup of coffee or go on a long walk.
•STEP 2: Express your emotions in a way that comes naturally. Write in a journal, paint, sculpt or play music.
•STEP 3: Do daily cardiovascular exercise--the endorphins will give your spirits an immediate lift.
•STEP 4: Resist the urge to call your ex. Instead, write a letter. Don't mail it.
•STEP 5: Go out of town for the weekend to distance yourself from the temptation to call your ex. Visit an old friend or go back home to your roots. A change of environment does wonders for the spirit.
•STEP 6: Put everything that reminds you of your ex in a box and seal it. Throw it away, donate it to charity or ask a friend to hold on to it indefinitely.
Week 2
Instructions
•STEP 1: Surround yourself with friends. This may mean reaching out to people you fell out of touch with during the relationship.
•STEP 2: Make lists to help you regain your confidence and identity: a list of your friends, of things you like, of what you want to accomplish in the next decade.
•STEP 3: Spoil yourself: Get a new hairstyle, have a spa day or go shopping.
•STEP 4: Resist the urge to call your ex.
Week 3
Instructions
•STEP 1: Assess the experience. Have you learned anything about yourself? Does the experience make you more empathetic to others who've suffered a hardship?
•STEP 2: Begin an activity that will fill your time, distract your mind and rebuild your confidence. Train for a marathon, take up yoga or learn a new language.
•STEP 3: Resist the urge to call your ex.
•STEP 4: Volunteer your time at a local homeless shelter, soup kitchen or tutoring center. It will take your mind off your own woes and keep your suffering in perspective.
Week 4
Instructions
•STEP 1: Continue regular socializing and exercising. While socializing, though, make sure you don't depend on alcohol or drugs to dull the pain.
•STEP 2: Call your ex if you feel it would be helpful. Resist if you merely want to say hurtful things.
•STEP 3: Consider dating other people, but be wary of rebound relationships.
•STEP 4: Understand that you will need to experience and process sadness, anger, guilt and fear to fully heal. Burying or ignoring these emotions will thwart the healing process. Write, cry, share the feelings with friends.
Months 3 to 6
Instructions
•STEP 1: Force yourself to go on dates. You'll be surprised to discover that your heart can still flutter over someone. It's part of the healing process.
•STEP 2: Consult a psychiatrist if you are experiencing symptoms of depression, such as lack of appetite, insomnia or too much sleeping, low self-esteem, and an inability to concentrate or carry out routine tasks. Ask a friend or physician to recommend one who is experienced in treating depression.
•STEP 3: Remember that healing is a process that takes time. Expect waves of sadness, anger, guilt or fear even after you think you are over it. Give your heart time to heal.
One year and beyond
Instructions
•STEP 1: Compartmentalize the experience in your memory: "My heart was broken once. It really hurt and I'm glad it's over."
•STEP 2: Reach out to your ex if you want to re-establish a friendship. Do not harbor secret ambitions of winning him or her back. You'll only set yourself up for another heartbreak

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

You are not in a healthy place. You have been abused by the one you love and you have barely any place to go. The best thing for you to do is work on you. Because of your history of abuse, I would see a counselor. This will help you recognize that what you were experiencing was wrong and unacceptable. You need to get out as much as you can and make some friends. A lot of abused women have been very isolated. I am not talking about clubbing either. Take some classes. If you don't have one, get a job. Keep yourself busy. Time will help the broken heart, but getting to know and love yourself will keep it from being broken for the wrong reasons.

Answer 4

Drink Allot

Answer 5

For one, if he was abusing you he is NOT worth it. I know you love him and all, but you have to have more self respect than that. Do not let anyone use you or abuse you. You're worth so much more than that! My advice is to cut all ties with Shawn and his family. Spend some time focusing on YOU. Find out who you are and what you're worth. Then when you do find Mr. Right, you'll realize that you're way over Shawn anyway.

Answer 6

I will never understand how women can love someone and be broken hearted by someone who has abused them. It's time to take control of your life and stop being a victim.
Go back to school. Get a great job. Be INDEPENDANT!

Answer 7

aww im sorry to hear that all this has happen to you. but maybe it was for the best. I cant believe he abused you and it sux that your parents dont help you out. but the only way to heal is to move on and time should heal your heart. watch later you will be very happy and never even remeber this time.

Answer 8

Your Parents need to be "PARENTS" getting mad is not going to help, they need to be for you now, the only way to get over a broken heart is "Time" ride it out and learn from your past relationship, take the positive energy and leave all the crap (Drama's) behind

Answer 9

Let time can heal a broken heart. Nobody really knows how to heal a broken heart. Just make yourself busy. I been broken hearted once , all i did is work, i make myself busy and one day times goes fast . i just find out that i am recovered from being broken hearted. i know its not that really easy... hey life is good , enjoy life to the fullest. And i am sorry to hear what happen to you. Take care always.

Answer 10

Sweetie, you need to understand that you deserve someone who will NOT abuse you. That's when you'll have real love. Go to the shelter if you have to. Get started living YOUR life, not a life around someone else. When you find out who YOU are, everything else will fall into place.

He's not worth your tears.

Answer 11

Eh, metaphorically speaking I have gotten my heart burned, cut, stepped on, shattered, punched, bombed, drugged, smashed, and so on.

Time heals all wounds. But if you're going to go through life, you need to accept the evil nature of man, and that the normal man will kick you if you fall, not help you up.