dont know what else to do?

Question

I feel like i have tired but dont know what else too do. Quite often my boyfriend will say we will do something and then it comes too the time and he changes plans, cant or has something on thats just come up. It leaves me feeling upset and dissapointed. When i try and explain my feelings too him he just gets defencive and in a way turns it back around onto me. I have tried so many different apporches but i just dont know what too do now. Im not saying we have a bad relationship and i dont want to end it with him over this just wondering if anyone would have any ideas. I really hate confrontation and will do anything to avoid it so somethimes that means i will end up saying sorry for something that really wasnt me. PLEASE help me

Answer 1

Hello....You should not ever have to say you are sorry if it is not your fault...you sound like a very nice person and very in love with your boyfriend...just be careful cause some people take advantage of the kindness you have...if he continues to act like a jerk i will say....you must just move on its not worth being broken hearted all the time .... sure it will hurt but if he is not sensitive to your feelings than he is not worth the time ..right now he knows where he has you always saying your sorry...tell him once again how you truly feel if he hears you and acts better than fine if not move on their are better kind people in the world....just telling you like it is take care

Answer 2

I hate to say this dear, but you are what a lot of ppl would call a door mat... I know how hard a relationship is and what it takes to keep one going, but there are times, when one person is more dominate than the other, that it is NOT a HEALTHY relationship.... Compromise is the important thing when just learning and growing into a commitment...... but , if one person refuses to do their share or at least SOME of the giving it just does NOT work...... YOU have a lot of thinking to do, but only YOU can decide what is right for YOU and only YOU can decide how far you are willing to go and how much is to much....... saying your sorry is a fine trait, but saying it for the wrong reasons is more damaging than you realize.... it is degrading and brings your own self worth down 2 notches every time you say it, and eventualy you will have none..... Men like this guy are a dime a dozen, but a good man is hard to find, but well worth the time and effort it takes to find him..... We ALL deserve true love and effection, respect and trust, as well as trusting in others....Just think about it all........ God bless

Answer 3

Don't back down and apologize if you didn't do anything wrong. I hate confrontation also, but what good does it do for your relationship if you take the responsibility for him being jerky? What I am trying to say is if you keep apologizing and not standing up for yourself then he will not quit treating you like that, he will think that it is OK for him to get all pissy towards you for everything, big or little. I don't really know how to make him stop except for to stand up to him and if he gets mad, them oh well let him, he will get over it, and if he doesn't then is he really worth it?

Answer 4

Sounds like me in sort of a way. I know how you feel, I do the same with my wife sometimes, and I feel bad about it...
Honestly, he isn't interested in the date you guys have together. Try spicing things up a bit romantically. If that approach doesn't work, go without him and take a friend. Maybe he'll get the point, and maybe he'll change his attitude. This problem will take time and calm persistence though...

Answer 5

I cry three times a week. I'll cry on a bus. Anyone doesn't like it, fack em they can look somewhere else. Price of being emotional. I never did think much of the macho man thing. Big deal. Anyone can be tough when they have to, but I'd prefer to be relaxed, laughing, or loving, personally.

Answer 6

If you don't want to finish your relationship the best idea I think ,can be at the time when he make plans to tell him," OH,DON'T BODER,BECAUSE AT THE END WE'LL FINISH DOING NOTHING ONE WAY OR ANOTHER".
Or you can find a new part-time partner who can fullfill your desires o those areas that your partner doesn't.-
You no have to feel sorry for something that is not your fault,and doing this [saying sorry]you make him feel proud of himself and give him a chance to have something else against you.-
Speak up,seat at the table and put the cards on it,show your game ask him to sow his,and then discuss what is the best way to reach a happy ending when you 2 make plans.-
All the best

Answer 7

That exact same thing happened to me. I hate confrontation too. And, well so did he. I asked a question to him about breaking up, and he had been wanting to end it for a while but couldnt get up the courage to do that. Ask him what he thinks and why he is acting like that, if you havnt already. Hope that helps!

Answer 8

Honey, what you need to do is not be so available to him all the time. let him call you, make him wonder about you. don't always be waiting by the phone. Try getting more involve with other things Have your own life and plans, that don't include him Guy like the thrill of the chase. Believe me it works all the time.

Answer 9

Will the next time he ask you to go somewhere be like you don't want to go (even if you want to go) and when he ask you why say because it really hurts me when the time comes for us to do whatever and something pops up but you know I love and I'll do what i can but i am just tired of you lieing (shed a quick tear).

Answer 10

There's nothing you can do...if he's that way and he's not at all sorry and you're always the one apologizing even when it's not your fault...it just won't work out in the end...one way or the other, somethings going to be wrong...