My sister in law watches my daughter a few days a week (my daughter is a little over a year old.) I have requested that since my daughter is starting table food that my sister-in-law not use her dishes when feeding my daughter. I told her that I will bring feeding dishes and utensils for her to use and then I want them washed and sent home with her each day. My sister in law has 2 young children of her own and still has baby bowls, and utensils, etc and seems to think that just because they have been washed in the dishwasher that it is okay to use on my baby. I told her that it really bothers me, myself, to have to eat off someone else's plates when I visit their home and I really don't want my baby doing it either. It really steams me up. Now her feelings are hurt because she thinks I am trying to say that they are not clean people, but it's really not sanitary to use other family's things. What can I do? She charges me $30 a week. Nobody else is going to babysit that cheap.
2007-01-25 11:37:43 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
You are worried about nothing. I agree with your sister-in-law.
2007-01-25 11:43:37 · answer #1 · answered by Barkley Hound 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Chill sister....The dishwasher is doing it's job. There is no proof that a plate when used at your in laws house is going to have any less bacteria on it if it is washed in your dishwasher. Pick your battles and this one is not worth it. What you have as far as disliking eating off of other people's flatware etc. is a hang up. Let it go. I used to have a hang up about "pot luck" food because I worried about the cleanliness of the cook's kitchen. One day I realized I was not going to die over a scoop of baked beans from the old lady at church. Take a deep breath and let it go.....If you find that you aren't able to get over it...be prepared to dish out some serious bucks because you are getting a very good deal for a babysitter.
Just a question- If you are ever invited to a friend's house for dinner...do you bring your own plates? If so- are your hosts offended?
2007-01-25 13:24:44 · answer #2 · answered by writer1055 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I'd just let your child eat off your sister-in-law's plates. If you go to other people's houses for dinner, do you bring YOUR own plates and flatware? If so, that's just really, really friggin strange. It's really kind of ridiculous when you think about it. If you were worried about your baby being clean, not putting possibly dirty/not thoroughly washed utensils etc. in her mouth, you'd keep her at home instead of having someone else babysit her. Just think of all the things she picks up at your SIL's house when she's there and crams in her mouth. If your daughter is just over a year old, she's probably still in the "If it's not nailed down, I'm going to pick it up and chew on it" phase, right?
2007-01-26 02:23:19 · answer #3 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I've never heard that one. So when you go to someone's house for Dinner or something do you take your own plate, utensils, and glass? You are being unreasonable here, and she is right to seem insulted. However, it's possible you have a form of OCD, I'm serious here. Talk to your Dr. Find an OCD quiz online and take it to see if you are OCD about other things as well. Try leaving your dishes and stuff at home and see if you can do it. If not, you probably need professional help. Good Luck.
2007-01-25 12:11:51 · answer #4 · answered by nimo22 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'm worried about you. I have never heard of anyone else who had that concern. Dishwashers clean and sanitize the plates with lots of hot water. I am worried that you might have obsessive-compulsive disorder or some other psychological problem. I wonder how you can stand your child being in someone else's house at all if you are worried about this. I think it's an unreasonable concern, and I wouldn't blame your sister-in-law for not wanting to go along with it. Perhaps it might be a good idea for you to get an evaluation with a psychologist or psychiatrist. I really am concerned about this.
2007-01-25 14:29:10 · answer #5 · answered by drshorty 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You are worried over nothing. How do think you are going to keep your daughter from eating off other people's plates the rest of her life? This is a good opportunity for you to learn to stop being way too overprotective.
You could also ask yourself what you are afraid of will happen by using other people's dishes. This sounds like an unrealistic phobia.
2007-01-25 12:17:50 · answer #6 · answered by Sandy Lou 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Only $30/week!!!! Most would charge you at least $30/day.
I think you need to talk to a doctor, or a therapist. You are going overboard on this whole thing. The dishwasher gets things cleaned------very clean. Take dishes for your child, if you want, and leave them there-forget this taking them home daily.
When I was little--MANY years ago--I kept colds and seem to be sick all the time. My mother was like you-no germs would get her child! Finally the doctor told her that she kept me too clean, too sheltered, and my body could not build up a proper immune system. So, she backed off (which I know must have really gotten to her), and I stopped getting sick.
Give your baby some breathing room!
2007-01-25 11:48:45 · answer #7 · answered by Shossi 6 · 9⤊ 0⤋
I can almost bet that this is your first child. As a first time mom you freak over EVERYTHING. The first thing you need to do is tell your sister-in-law that you're sorry. The next thing you need to do is chill. Your child is going to come into contact with so many germs, viruses, bugs, etc. If you are going to "sterilize" everything your baby comes in contact with, your kid is going to get sick at the drop of a hat. You need to let your baby's immune system get strong and the only way to do that is to let your baby be exposed to everything and I mean everything. Please don't tell me that you're one of those moms who doesn't run the vacuum cleaner when the baby is down for a nap, or you whisper when the baby is asleep. Don't do that. You're doing your baby a disservice.
2007-01-26 14:41:59 · answer #8 · answered by vik 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you are projecting your issues onto your daughter. You might want to stop this or she will grow up with HUGE issues. Where did you get your issue of eating off of some else's dishes from? Did you eat at someone's home that was an absolute pig? I don't understand your reasons.
2007-01-25 15:17:46 · answer #9 · answered by Julia B 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to chill!!! Your sis-in-law has every reason to be offended. Your logic is flawed as well, if she washes your baby's dishes with the rest of them, her kids 'cooties' (which don't exist) will be transferred to the 'clean' dishes you sent. Oh,Please!! If think your S-I-L should tell you to kiss her @ss!
Be careful that you do not force YOUR own issues on your child. You are well on your way to raising a neurotic, stressed out kid!
2007-01-25 11:52:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You are being very insulting and rude, sorry, but it's true. As long as she is washing the dishes, they are sanitary. If you are that concerned, provide her with antibacterial dishwashing liquid. You are being unreasonable. What do you do when you have dinner guests? Throw out your plates or use paper plates?What are your children going to do when they get older and go out to eat? You need to apologize and stop being anal.
2007-01-25 11:46:49 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋