get him round to the idear of being a dad, im scared to because im only 19 and hes 18 i need him by my side how can i get him to come round? please help!!
2007-01-25 10:36:45 · 22 answers · asked by Charlene G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
..dude doesn't want his life wrecked because of sex..
..happens all the time
..sorry
..only one that can make him do it is him..
2007-01-25 10:42:12 · answer #1 · answered by moonlit soul.. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm really sorry you're in this position. Clearly he is frightened by the prospect of becoming a parent *as you are too* - but he is NOT handling it well at all.
You two are both young - I can't blame you, but as a female that's why we have to be even MORE cautious re: sex and pregnancy because at the end of the day WE are the ones who bear the child *and therefore most of the early burden*. It's very easy for men to walk away, until the DNA tests come in. And even then, they can still walk away.
All I can say is try talking to him... but if he is not hearing you, then all you can do is hope once the child is born he feels different. This is what happened to a friend of mine. He denied the child when the girl was pregnant, but once he actually SAW the baby his heart melted and he's been there for her ever since.
I'm sorry and sad that he may not be there by your side, but don't you have family? Close friends? A support network? They should be able to get you through this scary time.
Good luck!
K.
2007-01-25 10:45:59 · answer #2 · answered by Ken K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all congratulations on your pregnancy. second, this is probably going to be very hard for you to do. not saying that this is the case for you but some young men when they find out they got someone pregnant they run away from their responsibilities. the fact that he claims he is not the father tips me off to the fact that maybe that is what he is doing. if this is what he is doing, when the baby is born you need to have a paternity test done to prove that he is the father and if he is not willing to support the baby then you need to go after him for child support. this is the danger of having intercourse at such a young age because people are not financially, mentally, or emotionally ready to have a child. this kind of thing happens everyday. hopefully he will eventually come around but from the sounds of it i am sad to say that i don't think that will be the case. hope this helps and good luck in the future.
2007-01-25 11:05:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to remember that guys are a bit more immature than women. You are both young and the idea of children is scary at any age. He is just afraid that life as he knows it is going to change. He needs to accept this on his own. You may end up having someone on your hands that hates your child and resents you for forcing it on him. Let him accept it gradually. Invite him along with you to appointments and stuff and the idea of having a child will grow on him. If it doesn't, don't hate yourself for it. Always remember that you have your family and your friends to be there for you. No woman "needs" a man. You can do this with or without him! There are men out there that will gladly take his place. Don't give up!
2007-01-25 10:49:47 · answer #4 · answered by shedevilnotunknown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can get a paternity test done once the child is born. He may not want to be responsible, but, if you go through the courts, he will have to at least be financially responsible. You can't make someone want to be a dad - he will have to come to terms with that on his own. However, his inability to accept is responsibility should not come between the necessities your child must have. Talk to a lawyer.
2007-01-25 10:45:37 · answer #5 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant make him into a father or make him stay with you. What you need to do is file for child support for that child it is up to him to help pay for it weather he wants an active roll in it's life or not. That is the best you can do for the child the rest will take time to find out if he is going to be a dad or not.
2007-01-25 10:43:48 · answer #6 · answered by d2347 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey i hope u have a good support system around u. parents, siblings, cousins/aunt, uncles, because u need to forget that idiot and start preparing for life as a single parent. if u haven't confided in anyone close to u, the time is now. because you're gonna need all the help u can get. handle your bidness and take him to court for child support once the baby is here. he'll get a blood test, and he'll hafta pay his child support. other than that there's not much u CAN do. hope u learn to choose better guys from this.
2007-01-25 10:45:36 · answer #7 · answered by feetal2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) Talk to his parents and hope they will put some sence into this boy mind.
2) Tell him that you will show him the blood test.
There is a possibility that he will not stand up to his dutties. You will need to go to court. The court will force him to perform a blood test. If the blood test pass then he will have two choices. 1) accept it and go with you and raise the child together. 2) Not accept it and pay child support. The blood test is pretty darn accurate.
2007-01-25 10:45:24 · answer #8 · answered by mr_gees100_peas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, this is a tuffy. in my opinion, he;s proubably to scared to be around, and the fact that he's only 18 and going to be a ftaher must really scare him. tell him how you feel, and that the 2 of you are in this together, then se what happen's.
2007-01-25 10:46:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a complete ****** and there's no point in forcing anybody to stick around if they don't want to. What a SCUM. Just get your child support from this loser and next time be careful about who you sleep with.
2007-01-25 10:44:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well hes a kid himself cant make him be a good dad. after the kids born get a test done and then start geting your money for not making him wear a hat. hopefully he will grow up good luck
2007-01-25 10:45:55 · answer #11 · answered by marynew8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋