what to do if your partner checks your voice mail and finds 2 voice mails of women expressing there feeling?

Question

one is an ex and one is an person that should have been out of the picture a long time ago. Which when she checked a long time ago was on the voice mail and your partner disaproved and was upset. But you are totaly wrong 100% other than the fact that she violated your person space. And you really want to be with this person and love so much how do you handle this siuation? what to say or do to be with this person?

Answer 1

Your current girlfriend sounds a bit insecure and mistrusting if she finds the need to check your voice mail to see who calls you. On the other hand if you respected her you would tell these two women that you are involved in a relationship with someone and their feelings for you should be kept to themselves. You need to make up your mind to what you want--sounds to me you enjoy the attention you are getting from the women but you don't enjoy having to answer question pertaining to this attention.
Is she wrong to snoop-yes; but you are wrong to play games with her emotions and mind.

Answer 2

First, why are those messages still on your phone? No, first is why haven't you told those women to stop calling you and then erasing their messages immediately.

Second, why is she messing in your private space? Unless you ask her to check your messages for you, she should not be getting into your voice mail. And the same goes for you.

Explain to her that she has violated your space and that needs to stop. Try and find a diplomatic way to say this or you'll start an argument you don't really want to have.

Move away from discussion about who the calls are from and go back to the point of her invading your space.

Answer 3

i have found myself in similar situations and actually came on here to pose a similar question (only mine was why am i so jealous of...). i can't say if it is wrong or right to check your partners mail, email voicemail etc. i constantly find myself checking my partner of 6 years' msn messages (crazy i know) with a particular girl that is very flirty toward him. my answer, although it is not what you may be looking for, is to talk to him. if you have been together for 4 years something is right so it shouldn't be big deal to sit down and tell him that it just bothered you andmaybe let him explain himself. we are all attracted to other people in some way or another whether we are single or in a relationship, and although it sucks sometimes, our boyfriends make girl-friends and vise versa, but if it bothers you then the best thing to do is to let him know. i get jealous of this particular girl all the time, although i don't know her, i sometimes feel that u hate her. yet i know that even if my partner has feelings for her the real problem is that ia m jealous of her, which means she has something i wish i had i guess. i guess what i am trying to say is that your jeaousy may be the root of something deeper than what you think, and the best way to deal with it is to sit down and talk and figure things out. hopefully this works, don't dweal on it, talk about it okay, good luck :)

Answer 4

I would have to say that lying about it would not be a good thing. Be honest. Honesty is the best policy. And, if you being honest would cause you two to split up, then you were probably doing something you weren't suppose to. At least you would be able to look yourself in the mirror every day and know that you told the truth. Because, if you truly love this person, then, they deserve the truth. Don't insult someone's intelligence by trying to cover something up. They deserve better than that. Lying or covering something up will only add insult to injury if you get caught in that deception. Good Luck in what ever you decide to do.

Answer 5

Well buddy, Just like every one your hind site is 20/20. Its hard to have done wrong as this and ever get trust back.I would say the best you can do is live with your mistake. I would ask her what she wants to do about it herself.Tell her you are truly sorry and that you don't know why you messed up but don't make lame promises.Women hate promises after you mess up.
Just tell her you wish to make your relationship work and will do all you can in your heart to make it happen.If she decides she loves you enough and wants to, she will say o-k.If not, expect to be kicked to the curb.You shouldn't have any animosity for her with that cause after all,you are the reason it ended up that way.Just remember in the future that it takes true effort to make a relationship work.And that "work" comes from both people truly wanting it to.

Answer 6

Women get upset over the smallest things. Some don't admit it, but we do. When a woman notices two messages on a voice mail, she will have lots of thoughts running through her head. Is he cheating? What's going on? Is he wanting to get back with his ex and have me on the side burner? The best thing to do is tell her that you're sorry and tell her the truth. But she had no right to violate your personal space either and you should tell her that. If she loves you, then she will believe that you would have the right to tell her if something is going on with you and other woman. A key to any relationship is communication along with trust and it seems to me like you both need some work. She needs to trust you and you need to communicate with her. The women on this voice mail expressed their feelings to you about something I don't know. But you do need to apologize to your girl and tell her the truth, but she needs to trust you and you both need communication. Tell her how you feel!

Answer 7

Be honest with your partner, tell her that these two women have been out of the picture for some time and that she is the only woman you care about.

You also need to tell her that by checking your voice mail, she is not only violating your privacy, but is also indicating to you that she does not trust you.

Tell your partner that you love her, but ask her to stop.

Answer 8

Come clean about what you have done and them you two need to move on from each other. You are clearly not a good match and she will probably never be able to trust you. You were in the wrong but she also needs to learn that everyone has a right to privacy regardless of the circumstances.

Answer 9

She checked your voice mail, which was none of her business -- but it turns out she was right not to trust you. So you blew it. Suck it up, and accept the fact that you don't get to keep a relationship unless you deserve it by being trustworthy.

If she wants to come back she can, but that's her decison; all you can do is start being trustworthy and hope she notices.

Answer 10

Yeah, I agree, it was a very serious invasion of your privacy. It is like going through a woman's purse or reading someone's mail...polite people just don't do it. If your relationship is worth it to you, you need to be up-front with her. You don't have to be brutal but she cannot be allowed to snoop like that. Does she go through your underwear drawer, too? It definately shows how insecure she is and that she doesn't trust you for some reason...and she may have no good reason, she's just being childish.