today after school my bf and i were in his car, then my friend called me, so we started talking about this one guy she likes. so, i said the guys name "luis." then he was like "whos luis? are you seeing a guy or something? then i was like "no" then he was like "im so tired of you lying to me all the time" which i dont by the way. then he took me home and we started arguing, he even called my friend but she didnt answer. we've been going for a month and i really dont want to lose him. what can i do!!?
2007-01-25 10:23:57 · 9 answers · asked by ana 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sorry sweetie he is already showing signs of an abuser!
2007-01-25 10:28:45 · answer #1 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can certainly try speaking to him about his behaviour and see if he changes. He might, but I have the feeling it'll only stick for a while and then he'll be back to his jealous ways.
This is who he is. Jealousy comes from internal insecurity or a sense of feeling threatened (of losing you). Those are HIS feelings, and there is nothing YOU can do to change them, or him. He has to change on his own.
Are you prepared to accept this is who he is? It's only been a month and please believe if anything he will get more jealous and/or possessive with time. Look a year down the road and imagine your future. Do you have the strength to constantly reassure him that you are NOT lying to him or cheating? You can do it now bcuz you're still in that honeymoon high but it will get tiresome after a few months.
Think hard then make a choice NOW.
K.
2007-01-25 18:34:48 · answer #2 · answered by Ken K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might be overprotective of you because he has had someone cheat on him in the past or he has had trust issues in the past. Tell him that you care about him a lot and reassure him that you would never do something like that. Try not to talk about other guys in front of him..ex boyfriends etc. If he is overly jealous though, stop the relationship. It could become abusive.
2007-01-25 18:31:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ahhhh...Yeah....your bf has some serious insecurity issues. This is usually a sign of a controlling personality. Not good. Break it off with him. Jealousy is "not" love, it's control. You never know, he may go off the deep end one day and get violent. You may end up hurt. Just get away from him and find a nice guy who respects your independance.
2007-01-25 19:01:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, u need to learn to NOT have conversations with your homegirls while you're with your BF. just like women like attention, guys wanna be paid attention to. next time answer the phone. once u determine it's not anything important, say: "hey i'm with my BF right now, let me hit u back later on".
2nd if he's already accusin u of lying and u say he has NO reason not to trust u, u need to take that as a sign that he has issues that u may not wanna subject yourself to. let him know that he either needs to learn to take u at your word or leave u alone.
2007-01-25 18:34:29 · answer #5 · answered by feetal2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes showing that he doesn't trust you and that my friend is not a good sign of a good relationship. Try talking to him and avoid talking about boys, especially mentioning their names.If the conversation gets rough threat him by ending up the relationship and see how he reacts.. Good luck andi hope everything goes ok
2007-01-25 18:35:11 · answer #6 · answered by jossu_candelario 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was like that when i first stated dating, all guy want to know what is goin on. If they don't they feel they don't have control of the situation. you need to talk to him about it and u have to tell him that it was ur firend talking about someone that u knew. you can't leave things out or he'll panic
2007-01-25 18:36:34 · answer #7 · answered by Mysterious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should let him no how u feel about him and once a person is jealous it is hard to control dat bcuz dat is just da way dey r and u have to let him no dat u would not cheat on him and dat if he really wanted to b in a relationship wit u den he will have to start trusting u on dings
2007-01-25 18:29:29 · answer #8 · answered by ~J3N~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look i think it's best if u break up with him becuase like the other person said he does show sings of being those psycho abuser type bf...it's the best thing to do for u.
2007-01-25 18:31:36 · answer #9 · answered by Jenny0305 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋