I'm almost 27 & have pretty much been depressed since my mid teens - badly at times. Although I have a good network of mates, I've never had a g/f & I feel this might be the reason for my depression, especially as I see my friends in great relationships. I had bad experiences with girls in my teens which scarred me & looking back, suspect this was the start of my depression. I always got the impression they wanted nothing to do with me so didn't bother with them as I had no confidence in doing so. I want to try & turn things around but I get the feeling I have missed out on so much & am so behind the pack & therefore, no girl in their right mind is going to want anything to do with me. I realise my shyness hasn't helped but can anyone offer any advice because I really am really worried that I've missed the boat but yet I just do not know what to do? Obviously this is totally embarrassing so would appreciate a bit of tact with regards to responses please.
2007-01-25 09:28:15 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Behind the pack? You sure are. And, good riddance to the others. Women don't like boys still in their "pack behavior" stages of development. You'll find love when you give love. It's about people. Do you enjoy them? Do you savor watching children play? Do you find delight for others who overcome? Do you root for people in their plans and goals? Are girls pretty to watch, just to watch and enjoy like flowers? Or, do you think about yourself when you see girls? Let go of yourself and get to know more about other people's visions and art and feelings. You connect and find love by learning about other people's stories. You'll find a story that captures your heart and then you'll rise with great passion to be a part of that story. Or you won't. Do you think you'll live forever, sir? Get out there and romp with some three year olds in a nursery school as a volunteer and blow grossly loud bubbles on their bellies. That's a very wholesome way to begin to find your passion for life. Truly. Try it. You'll see. There's a jovial, whimsical look men get in their eyes, a look that says, "I enjoy life and humanity". Women have radar for that look. So, go forth and be jovial and whimsical.
2007-01-25 09:46:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's never too late to change and to find love.
I am perfect evidence of that. I was like you when I was younger. I have a history of depression and was very shy. I am still a bit shy. With mostly my determination to reach my goal, I succeeded in finding love late. It took me some years, and climbing over obstacles, and meeting many toads, but I did find my prince.
I'm sure you can find it too. Get someone to talk with to help you if needed. Don't be afraid to ask for help. There is no "pack" to be behind and don't let anyone tell you you'll fail because you WILL succeed. You may experience some bumps and toads along the way, but you will succeed.
If I can find love, so can you. Good luck. :)
2007-01-25 10:00:37 · answer #2 · answered by Nancy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, go and see your doctor to know if high blood pressure makes you depressed or not.
Gym will help you a lot with your body and friendship. An attractive body always attracts girls.
Relax, and try to talk to someone (male or female) at a hot tub, sauna and build your communication skill. (You need to smile - or at least having a happy face - all the time to welcome people come to you.)
Do not be down or look people down. Do not be too easy to girls or too difficult either.
Having a right g/f is not easy. Be patient, some girl out there is waiting to have a chance to meet a guy like you.
2007-01-25 10:38:19 · answer #3 · answered by Henry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its never to late to change ...first off , id be willing to bet you may have some apperence issues ... try hitting the gym.... feeling better physicly and being in shape would help you out emotionally .... if you ware glasses get contacts... basicly what im trying to sau is if you can look into a mirror and think " wow , I look great" that will help with your shyness . pluss women will like what they see ... if a women is phsycly attracted to you then walking up to her and talking to her is alot easier...besides alot to approaching women is confidence ... whatever you do ... be confident.... when your out at the store or doing anything make an effort to just smile and say hello to women ... start conversations with them ..Im not sayimg flirt with every women you see just talk ... itll help... its all about getting out of your comfort zone ... if someone ignores you or is rude to you ... SO WHAT... anyone who is offencive or rude to you... isnt worth bothing about... just smile the fact they cant bother you will drive them nuts .... besides the people in your life that really matter to you is the opinions that matter ... everyone else in the world DONT.... You kind of adopt a I dont give a crap attitude ... .... I know working out is a huge booster... When YOU think you look good ... other people will notice expecially women ... remember its never to late
2007-01-25 09:51:02 · answer #4 · answered by xxxcaptain_howdyxxx 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No You are not late.. you seem like a nice shy man.. I'm sure you will find love.. But, you have to work for it a bit..
You cant just sit at home and expect her to come ring your doorbell..
Seek help for your depression.
How can you think you have missed the boat...? the boat is never leaving darling...
PS. Some women ( including me) think shy men are interesting..and sweet.. ;-)
2007-01-25 10:35:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey women should be falling at your feet!! A man with no baggage. You should be thankful.
If you shy away from women, then your not going to get a date. I know it may sound sexiest but woman prefer to be approached by a man. Its not often that a woman approaches a man, to let him know that she's interested.
You need to start enjoying life more. Get to the gym - feel good about your body. Learn to communicate with women on a friendly level. Take an evening class in something that really interests you - then your more likely to meet someone like-minded.
Trust me... you'll find your perfect match soon!!
2007-01-25 10:17:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Three things...
1) You are who you think you are. You will be perceived as you project yourself to be. If you think of yourself as a loser, you will be a loser. If you think of yourself as one worthy of every woman wanting, then you will probably be better off.
2) The only point when it is too late to enjoy life is when you're dead. If you feel you want a relationship to help in your life, then seek one.
3) Depression is usually much deeper than longing for a date, you might want to get that checked by a professional. Depression could be the cause of your inability to seek relationships instead of the effect of it. You have to love yourself before you can love others, otherwise you set yourself up to be abused.
2007-01-26 16:51:48 · answer #7 · answered by Tragicfame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never too late to find love and be loved. My concern for you first and foremost is your depression. You really need to see someone about that. When someone is depressed it shows in their actions and sometimes words and people tend to shy away from people who are depressed.
Your boat will come in........ Get help for the depression and see how much happier of a person you can be.
2007-01-25 09:40:34 · answer #8 · answered by saved_by_grace 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend who was a twin...they didn't have girlfriends for many years growing up, and went on their dates for the first time, at age 28 years old...Then they went hog wild lol...so it is never to late to get started into the scene...They got married, and have kids, and grandkids...and dated a lot, once they really got into it. and got over their shyness...So, my advice to you, would be to go first, and make sure you look your best....Find some things that you really like, and really read up on them,..you haven't missed out really, you're just getting a later start, a late bloomer, if you will...you don't have to tell them this,...and if you are shy? Be shy..just be yourself, and go have some fun..and if one acts like she don't want to go out with you? Do like Mae West, the movie star used to say, and say, "I don't cry over (men in this case, women) I say Who's next?"...have a ball sweetheart, just be a good young man, and I pray you meet the girl of your dreams!
2007-01-25 09:43:43 · answer #9 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it not to late to find love. you will find love someday not do not give up hope yet
2007-01-25 10:50:51 · answer #10 · answered by back248 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋