I need help figuring out this guy. Please help!!!?

Question

There is this guy and we have been talking for a little over 3 months, from the beginning he expressed to me that he was not ready or looking for a relationship because he just got out of a 2 year relationship 8 months ago, and I totally under stand that, but we talk everyday and if I go a day and not call him he says good to hear from you, when i see him he tells me it is good to see me, when i talk to him he tells me how he wanted to kiss me and I told him that i like him but I am not ready for a realtionship either , and really I am not, but I am just wondering what we are doing here,we talk about everything under the sun, we have so much in common it is ridiculous, is he just trying to be my friend or maybe trying to get to know each other better? Help Pleazzzzzzzz

Answer 1

Just keep on doing what your doing. They say that the best relationships start with great friendship. Maybe neither of you are ready for anything serious at the moment, but you never know what might happen down the line. I do think its true that best friends are best lovers, because when you do fall in love you really know the person inside and out so it is true love.

Answer 2

If he got out of a 2-year relationship 8 months ago then I think that is a long time. Maybe not enough to heal - that might take forever but certainly enough time to start thinking about moving forward. It sounds like he either really respects you by waiting and might be trying to connect on another level (other than physical). Or, he really only looks for a friend. Which would be nice because it does sound like the two of you are getting along.
Since you talk about everything...why not ask him straight up if he could see the two of you being a couple one day? He should value you enough as a friend to give you an honest answer so that you can decide what to do based on his answer?

Answer 3

Well I know that sometimes they say that having a close nit relationship is better than dating. I mean think about if you were to date him, would you still talk about everything under the sun? I mean maybe there will be a wall that you both put up when you start actually dating.
It sounds like to me, is he doesnt want to deal with another relantioship right now. Meaing he doesnt want to get hurt again ot deal with the pain of breaking up with someone else. So take it slow and maybe the answer will fall in your lap. Maybe one day he will come to realize you are the only one he can tell all his issues too......
So like I said let it takes it path and maybe just maybe he will understand that you are the one for him:)
Good luck!

Answer 4

Come right out and ask him. Say, I" have been going by what you last said to me, that you are not ready for a relationship". But, then the way that you say things, and tell me that you want to kiss me, this throws me off.

Have things changed, are you now ready for a relationship and this is your way of showing me?

Be up front with him, any relationship needs communication-regardless of the type.

** just make sure that you are careful. Sometimes guys are on the rebound or just wanting a little action. Trust your heart and gut insincts.

Answer 5

I think it is a good thing you are becoming friends, first. Maybe neither one of you are ready for a relationship and this is the next best thing! If you have a lot in common then build on that as a friend and see what happens!! You know what they say.......you will find a new love when you least expect it!

Answer 6

Based on your version and observations (sorry, I can't hear his), I would take his reluctance to engage in a romantic relationship, seriously. And that's for your protection, emotionally, perhaps even physically. If he's being truthful about his past, then he's on the rebound and rebounders are nowhere near ready, emotionally, to date, let alone romance/commit. On the extreme downside......his admittance to suggest a kiss, may be his indirect way of expressing what he's really searching for: a sexual relationship without commitment, or it may be a sign that he's begun to overcome the past. Whatever the case may be, he definintely needs to heal (strength his self-confidence/self image), before he can SINCERELY give you his all. I don't think you're interested in someone who could suddenly abandon you, leaving you devastasted........or would you?! I would continue with a platonic relationship. When he's ready for what you're ready for, you'll both be on the same page and it'll all have been worth waiting for!!!
(WARNING: just be careful.......too many doggs out there who use and abuse for sex, money or both)
GOOD LUCK !!!

Answer 7

Its hard to say... I mean maybe neither of you are ready for the "title" but you might be ready to "date" there is nothing wrong with dating considering your already at that stage where things have been talked about. A dinner here and a night in there wont hurt anything and then if your ready for the relationship tell him and if he is perfect. No loss of time considering right now neither of you are "ready" Good luck!

Answer 8

It sounds like you're both just using each other to stay in practice. There is nothing that says you have to have a serious relationship to enjoy eachother's company. But you two seem to feel the need to keep placing limits on what you can have. So what's the point? Either go ahead and go on a date, or just leave it as a casual, meaningless flirtation. And there's nothing wrong with those, but they're certainly nothing to obsess over.

Answer 9

Yes, I would believe he is very interested in you, and just needs a little time to get over his break-up. Its good to start like this as you are both still figuring eachother out, and your relationship with him now believe it or not- is Blossoming! He loves to hear from you and is obviously interested because he has told you honestly how he feels. I think he just needs a little time, and think he may well become your Boyfriend when he is ready. Best of Luck.

Answer 10

I think you both want the same thing but are a little scared and are being cautious. Answer me this, do you want to go to your grave wondering what might have been? No! I guess he's the same, give it time and see what happens, the worst is you'll end up great platonic friends and I can assure you, that's not a bad thing either!