Devistated 7 year old?

Question

I have an issue with this kid in my sons daycare he is 9 years old an my little boy is 7. This 9 year old boy went up to my son saying he thinks strippers are hot and telling my 7 year old what a blwjob is and how good it feels. My 7 year old was devistated and Ive talked to the child care teacher and says they had a talk with the kid but yet he still continued to talk filth to my son and even told my son he wants to lick his mom. Where does a 9 year old leanr this and should I report this to child protective services? I have removed my child out of that day care ( it was during the winter break) but it seems everything this 9 year old has said to him really has him botherd what would you do as a parent who had to deal with something like this???

Answer 1

I don't really have an answer for you but this just broke my heart to read... I just wanted you to know somebody was thinking of you... Good luck...

Answer 2

That behavior is inappropiate and perhaps you should talk to the Family Services about his behavior. Write letter so that they are documented as it leaves a paper trail and just shows that you tried to deal with the issue. The topic should have been brought to the parents attention and not just the child care worker. You shouldn't be the one to remove your child although I know you did it for good reason, but that just leaves the child to make lewd remarks to another. The problem is still there so you should take stand and make sure no other child has to feel the way your son does. Contact the parents and if they do not address it then go to protective services.

Answer 3

Your child has literally been traumatized by the information. And really - he has been sexually abused by this boy.

You did the absolute right thing in removing your child. You may want to contact DFS about what is reportable. There is no harm in calling and asking questions about what you should report. They may tell you that there is nothing they can do - but you can rest easy.

I would enlist the help of a school guidance counselor - or ask your pediatrician, clergy, or even DFS - for some guidance and support as to how to help the emotional damage done to your son. They might be able to help you on your own, or they might be able to recommned a good child psychologist that can at least give you advice.

Proceed with caution though so as to not create more trauma in the effort to help him. There is a fine balance between helping and only making it worse.

You are most likely going to have to help him understand the sexual content he heard, but allow him to frame it in age-appropriate way. You may have to tell him that grown ups sometimes do things that seem weird to kids- like drink coffee - most kids think coffee is gross - and that some of the things that boy told him have to do with the things that some grown-ups do. But he is a little kid - and doesn't need to worry about those things. Answer his questions HONESTLY - but age appropriately.

And that sometimes when kids don't understand these things, they think it is fun to pretend like they do and bother other kids with it. But that isn't okay, and some information should just be kept to yourself.

Watch him VERY closely over the next few months. No unsupervised playdates, etc. You don't want him processing this by sharing it.

It's very likely that this will pass with time.

Answer 4

Uuuhhh... WOW!! My son is also 7. I can't imagine him repeating that type of filth to me! The course of action that came to mind was to talk to the head of the center. Inform him/her that if something isn't done about it, you'll make sure that every other parent knows what filth is being condoned there! Generally a day care center can handle losing one child, losing a handful at the same time can be another story. Also, I would go into my son's school and ask to speak to the counselor. He/She would have the information on how to handle the situation and your son. I don't, however, believe that having a detailed talk with your son about what he has heard is a good idea. If he's a bit overwhelmed by it now, imagine how it could affect him. Good luck!

Answer 5

I have a 9 year old son and although he wouldn't know about things like this he'd catch on if someone older was to talk around him about it. We now have to seriously screen what he watches and hears because he is understanding more.
This child is obviously around older people more then children his own age. I don't think that I'd go to social services first, I'd start with the day care again and ask for a meeting. They need to meet with the child's parents so they are aware of it.
You need to talk to your son like only a mother can and make sure he understands that talking like this is inappropriate and that 9 year old had no right to talk to him about these things. He needs to know if he has any questions that's what your for so you know he's getting the right answers.
Best of luck.

Answer 6

I would definitely report it. I would also tell them to check out the day care. If you had already talked to the caregiver and nothing was done, she most likely didn't talk to the kids parents. Something needs to be done about it. No 9 year old should know anything about that stuff.

Answer 7

Call the police and take your child out of the daycare. First of all it is sexual harassment to your child. If the daycare is not keeping an eye on this child to prevent this they are not good enough for any child to be in there!
I am sorry that this has happened but get your child away from them. to protect him.

Answer 8

that is sexual harrasment against both your son and you. Tell the little twerp's parents, and if they don't do anything, tell them to *you know what*. Try calling child services and maybe they will investigate. If this kid ever says anything to ur kid again, take the kid aside and tell him that he is very inappropriate. Get on the daycare person's case for letting this happen again. Hope it turns out.

Answer 9

First you need to talk to the person that manages that particular daycare and tell them that you wish to meet with not only her but the owner so that you can tell them the problem and the lack of action being taken. If they attempt to stall tell them in no uncertain terms that you will report them to DSHS who inspects them for their quality of childcare.

Then you need to approach your own child. I know that you are upset about what your seven year old has been taught but realistically he is going to learn things younger than you want him too anyway. Don't traumatize him by making it so huge that it is just horrible in his own mind, but explain the situation as you want him to understand (such as acts of love only should happen with someone who you are deeply in love with/married to and that women should be respected). He will still be confused slightly, but the trauma is coming from how you are reacting.

While at the meeting with the owner and manager you need to address the other boy and explain that your worries are not only for your sons far to young education on the acts that occur between adults, but also for the nine year old who appears to have an extensive knowledge of the issue. They can tell you what they are willing to do in regards to making sure that this doesn't happen again and you can suggest CPS to them explaining that you don't know where he got the ideas he has, but that they may be damaging to him if he is experiencing these things through his home life.

Also many children are left in daycare and are resentful, because of the way that the parents use daycare as either a punishment or as a parent so that they don't have to be one. In return to this resentment these kids act out by saying things and doing things for shock value that they know are inappropriate. It isn't right, but I just want to make sure you understand where the troubled child might be coming from. I've seen it many times in seven years of working at daycares.

Good Luck.

Answer 10

Wow, that's crazy!! Most likely this child has an older brother whom he's heard talking about this stuff. I would however contact Social Services because this child is being exposed to too much too soon.

Answer 11

Take her out to lunch, then perhaps bypass bowling or out to a movie or some thing. she will do not ignore that you being there at her birthday is the biggest because it become you who further her into the international. notwithstanding her 2 maximum acceptable acquaintances can't make it to her birthday party, she nonetheless has human beings round her who cares about her very a lot. strong success, and also you seem an truly good mom merely attempting to make your daughter chuffed. keep up the strong artwork.