If you say or do anything that upsets my sister in law, she ignores you. She and I don't see eye to eye, but I have always keep my mouth shut. She lives with her parents and her 3 kids, doesn't have a job and doesn't do much around the house. Because of this "lifestyle" she gets on my nerves, but I say nothing. Last year she accused me of ignoring her, I said that I wasn't, didn't know what she was talking about and left the room. Since then, she has ignored me! My husband tried to talk her, but she is blaming me for not talking. I once apologised to her because her parents insisted, even though they knew I didn't do anything wrong, for something that I STILL don't know what I did. So, this time around I am standing my ground, I am not apologising for something I didn't do. But, the family is divided now, we don't go over to my in laws anymore, we don't see her kids, I think it's sad. Any ideas about what can be done?
2007-01-25 05:52:15 · 5 answers · asked by doodles 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She could possably be jealous of what you have if her situation is not that great. Have a talk with her that even though there are problems going on that you would still like to see the kids. The whole family should not have to be divided over something like this. but as for fixing the problem. can't think of much. She seems a little immature or has a jealousy issue. sometimes with people like that there really is no way to fix it. They are always going to be that way. suggest some therapy for her.
2007-01-25 06:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by rain9439 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ah yes I think I know the type, she is probably pretty shallow. Smile and be "friendly". don't allow her to goad you. It might take some practise but be strong, don't focus on her lifestyle! Don't apologize but make amends anyway.
This is a bit sneaky but it might help: Ask her to lunch in order to 'discuss things'. tell her that you regret the animosity between the two of you, and then ask her if there is a way to keep the family together despite your differences.
Like I said sneaky, its pretty much implying that you apologized without ever saying sorry; in addition she will feel a bit proud that you asked her what to do. Don't allow your anger to get the better of you! I've met a lot of these people, try your best.
If this doesn't help just contact me okay?
2007-01-25 14:20:33 · answer #2 · answered by osellius 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You be the bigger person, start to go over your in-laws, and take your family, say to your husband lets go over their, and just speak to her, no need to apologies, just act like nothing happened, ask her how she is doing? Life is too short, Family"s need to stick together, if one does not see eye to eye, just keep the lines of communication open, and one day they will join in. She is probably jealous of you and your husband, This is a new year, start out on a new slate!
2007-01-25 14:14:05 · answer #3 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"she gets on my nerves, but I say nothing" This statement indicates that you were upset and not realizing it probably gave her a little attitude not intentionally, she probably picked up on it and decided not to talk to you. Either way the mis- communication stemed from you. You are both adults talk it out and apologise it is the mature thing to do that is if you want a good relationship with your sister-in law.
2007-01-25 14:04:47 · answer #4 · answered by Ans 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be civil with each other you be yourself go to your in-laws and don't let her bother you,after all its not her house,just be civil for your husband,and in-laws,people like that try to find things to argue about but don't let her get the better of you ,you be better than her and just ignore her.good luck
2007-01-25 14:06:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋