My soul-mate died in a plane crash over 15 years ago. I thought I would give the "L" word another shot about 7 years ago. Made a mistake, it wasn't love or lust - it was a loser (with one beautiful outcome - my daughter).
I know what it's like to be in love and to have a soul mate - Do you think it is selfish to want this twice in a lifetime?
2007-01-25 04:46:17 · 19 answers · asked by hot single mom 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe because I feel this way - I'm just not ready for a relationship..... One day though.... I know I will be - so I'll just stick to my romance novels and just check'n the guys out from afar. lol
2007-01-27 01:44:42 · update #1
My aunt has been in the same situation.My uncle died in a plane crash in 1986,he was on his way home for their 1st year wedding anniversary.The plane he was on was full of married military men,the single men gave up their seats and took the next flight.My uncles plane was shot down over New Finland by terrorists.My aunt did get involved with another man that like you he ended up being a loser but she to got a beautiful girl out of the relationship.She is now with a really nice guy that loves her and her daughter.Her daughter considers this man more like her father than she does her real dad.My aunt will never get over the loss of my uncle but she was able to move on and love again and so can you.It is far from selfish to want to be loved.
2007-02-02 03:02:46 · answer #1 · answered by kipp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it's not selfish! You shouldn't be so harsh on yourself. A lot of people believe that there isn't just one 'soul mate', but many. As where you will never forget, the unfortunate passing of your loved one. The pain will ease when that someone special comes along. You may just as happy, or happier. Keep faith and be positive about what life has to offer. You can love like that again, you just need to find the right person to share your love with.
2007-01-25 05:04:11 · answer #2 · answered by Kay 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is selfish at all. Time heals all wounds. When you are good and ready to fall in love again, you will know; just let him find you! Love will find you when you are not looking for it, that's when it hits you like a ton of bricks! We are on this earth for a reason and some of us have the great fortune of finding Mr. Right, twice. You might be one of those women!! Good luck and hope this helps!
2007-02-01 15:33:21 · answer #3 · answered by Vanes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Twice? LOL, I'm working on my 4th or 5th. I've always wanted a little girl but I got a son instead. My one TRUE love had an affair with her boss so I dumped her and it almost killed me to do it. It's not selfish to want to be whole.
Go out and find another even if they won't take the place of the one you lost, they might be able to fill that empty space where he once took up.
Don't worry about it, you'll do fine.
2007-01-25 07:28:25 · answer #4 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not selfish at all. In fact it's Normal to want another soul mate. Finding one is the problem. Just try to remember "Do not compare others with your last soul mate" Except him for who he is and let it grow between you. You'll know soon enough if it's working or not. And Please...Don't wait until you have another child to dump him id it's not working.
2007-01-25 04:54:51 · answer #5 · answered by nalla 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No way are you being selfish. Fill that void, for your sake and your daughters.She needs to learn all she can from you.Both good and bad ,the way to pick up the pieces and carry on.She needs your support as you need hers.Your decisions will be more involved now than before.Look at all the wisdom you have achieved in the past few years ,put this to good use,believe me you are worth it , not to say how your daughter could benefit.You're a team now ,it maybe easier than you think. Good Luck, I'm sure you will consider all you have to ,to make healthy good decisions for you and yours.
2007-02-02 04:24:29 · answer #6 · answered by thad007ryan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've heard of many stories like this and yes, they are true. Generally, marriages fail because one or both of the people in them change and become something different than originally. For you, it seems that you both already have gotten to your maximum maturity and can't change further, and you still feel that connection where you're bound to each other. So, yes. I believe you were in love for over 35 long years.
2016-03-29 02:07:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will, and no it's not, everyone finds love more than once, well not everyone. Some people find it more than twice! Just keep your wall up for the losers and let it down for the romantic ones.
2007-02-01 14:19:46 · answer #8 · answered by Tigerlover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will find love again,you deserve to be happy. Sometime love comes more than once. I havent found my soulmate yet and I have been in love more than once. Nonthis is not selfish.
2007-02-02 01:53:48 · answer #9 · answered by canteloupesweet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly would have to say that you will find another guy that sparks your flame and plucks your heartstrings. You and he will realize this and you will both be happy together. As for selfish, absolutely not. You are entitled to love and happiness in your life.
2007-01-25 05:23:42 · answer #10 · answered by Derek Wildstar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋