my girl asked about trying to get custody of her little half sister yesterday... i'm the bf she lives with if you read her question. anyways, i'm all for it, i mean i've never raised a kid before but i'm sure we can do better than taylor's mother can. she loves that girl with all of her heart. and she's sooooo good with children. every kid she's came across has fallen in love with her. she use to work at an elementary school when she was 15... volunteer work and she still has little pictures all the kids drew her saying they love her and whatnot.
anyways, i'm afraid that if she goes through with this that i might not be a good "dad" or whatever figure for taylor. i know tasha can handle it and i just want to be supportive. she's going to be a magnificant mother someday and a role model to everyone. she's my hero, my world.
am i stressing about my role in this or what?
2007-01-25 02:05:36 · 11 answers · asked by True_Blue 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i guess i'm wanting to be the best i can for taylor but it's gonna be hard i know. tasha is like the mother everyone wants. fun with rules. you can play if you do your homework. he.ll she even babysits our boss's granddaughter while at work and getting work done while playing barbies with addison. she has pictures all over her desk that addison drew her. she framed a letter from taylor that says tasha you are the greatest big sister ever love taylor. i don't know how she manages to make everyone happy, including herself, people she doesn't know that well, and me.
2007-01-25 02:15:07 · update #1
i'm 23. she's 20, 21 in may. and taylor is 11.
2007-01-25 02:20:12 · update #2
SHE raised taylor when SHE lived at home. SHE makes 400-600 dollars a week. SHE's 20 with a college degree and a full time job. taylor's mom doesn't work, keeps the house a mess at all times, they have mice and bugs and such. her mom gets money from the government cuz she doesn't want to work.
2007-01-25 02:33:00 · update #3
It obviously sounds like you are ready and willing to take on this role. No one is born a parent. It is full of trial and error. All you can do is realize your home is a better environment for the girl...that alone says you have what it takes to be a good caregiver. Keep the lines of communication open. This will be a huge step for everyone involved. Just like any parent or caregiver knows is that you learn as go. Nuture the relationship between you and your girlfriend...after all the happiness of the household depends on that relationship. Good luck. Stop stressing about it.
2007-01-25 02:15:09 · answer #1 · answered by Traci J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have just asked the same question that every single man in the world has asked when they find out they are going to be a dad!!! No one knows exactly what is going to happen but if you love this child and are willing to open your heart up to her , then by all means , go for it. And if you are insecure about how good you will be then sign up at a local center for parenting classes. They work wonders for people who are unsure or just need a little more assistance in the parenting department. ALl I can say is this.. speak with a soft tongue.. play with a big heart.. dicipline with a gentle mind and love like this is the last day you have to spend with her. And dont be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Even parents need time out. If you feel you are getting overwhelmed or stressed.. take a walk. Dont let the child be the brunt of any anger or retribution. Diciplining a child isnt a free ticket to abuse. As long as you remember these things.. you will be fine. Just relax and enjoy it.
2007-01-25 02:13:55 · answer #2 · answered by aurora1963_2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don’t know who your girlfriend is and I didn’t see her posts, but I will tell you that she’s not going to get custody unless she can prove her parents unfit, and even then she might not get custody. It will depend on many factors such as her age, her maturity level, her ability to provide for the child (HER ability, not her and YOURS), etc. If the court doesn’t feel she’s an appropriate guardian, even if they find the parents unfit, they won’t give her custody. Which of course does not mean in any way that they would allow the parents to retain custody.
Just be aware that it’s going to be an uphill battle.
I hope Girlfriend has an attorney. She needs to ask the attorney how the court will view the fact that she intends to bring the child home to live with her and YOU.
Frankly, based on what you’ve written, I think you might need a little dose of reality: Having FULL responsibility for a child is MUCH different than babysitting or volunteering.
2007-01-25 02:28:45 · answer #3 · answered by kp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the fact that you have doubts is a good thing. Anyone who takes on the responsibility of raising a child without doubts is either misguided or doesn't plan on doing much. I think the respect and love that you have for your gf is going to bring you through this fine. It sounds like your girlfriend and you are going to raise this little girl in love and demonstrate for her what a loving, supportive, healthy relationship. This is the best role modeling that you can give. Good luck to the three of you. When you do get custody make sure that the two of you do schedule some couple time. Do what you do...continue to love your girls and you guys are gonna be fine.
2007-01-25 02:15:59 · answer #4 · answered by newyorktilson 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was in your girlfriends shoes I took care of my brother when I lived at home and went to court to make it legal.Yes, I had to get a lawyer I got temporary custody and after a year I was made his legal guardian, I had to go to parenting classes and had a case worker who made surprise visits in that year but it was worth every single second My little brother is now 16. All a child really needs is someone to love them, worry about them, and care about them. The rest comes with those things.
2007-01-25 03:29:46 · answer #5 · answered by bkm_71csi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate to assert it, yet she has a boyfriend!!!!! meaning she is off limits. If she likes you, she would be able to allow you recognize. then you certainly will could be one hundred% specific she is single and ended it along with her boyfriend, or you're only soliciting for hassle. on the different hand, could you somewhat desire to be with a girl who flirts like that at the back of her boyfriends' backs. you're able to look on the excellent image here.
2016-12-16 13:10:29 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry - its all new for you. I know you'll do fine. Just take one day at a time - one step at a time. Together you can do it. Sure, there will be hard times but..... you know? Just be yourself, think ahead of doing things, and don't worry so much. Good luck and God bless you both for doing what your doing.
2007-01-25 02:12:04 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have doubts about your father/dad possibilities
watch what Tasha does and listen to how she talks to the children. you will learn from her.
2007-01-25 02:12:30 · answer #8 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's good that you're thinking long-term. That's an excellent trait for a father-figure!
Good luck to all of you.
2007-01-25 02:12:04 · answer #9 · answered by steelypen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes relax and do what you can,also do whats best for yourself,be involved as much as you feel you can be everything will work out,you sound like a good person
goodluck
2007-01-25 02:13:23 · answer #10 · answered by jewel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋