when I defend myself against his painful insults. I actually respond in a challenging way, to ask for the basis of his insult. But he just says "I've had enough of your backtalk". I just always thought it was a reference made regarding child-parent relationships, and not adult. What do you think?
2007-01-25 00:24:44 · 21 answers · asked by Peaceful 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Thanks to everyone, youall are telling me what I have always thought. He is a condescending, patronizing blow-hard, who thinks he is king. His life revolves around himself, and its true narcissism. He truly likes, no....LOVES to belittle people, its his hobby. The more lowly you are the more he kicks. Its because he has an inflated vision of himself. Always will, never to change. I just deal with it. Thanks all!
2007-01-25 02:13:36 · update #1
its very condescending for him to say that. Its like he's saying he's allowed to insult you but youre not allowed to defend yourself. The old "He can dish it out, but not take it" thing. The next time He tells you he's had enough of your back talk, I'd just simply tell him, I've had enough of you , period. He's actually talking down to you, not only by insulting you, but by getting mad and treating you like a child when you defend yourself. Probably because he knows his insults have no basis, he CANT defend them, so instead of even trying, he blows you off. Good solution .....for him. Not for you. I think you need to confront him about this. All I know is you're an adult, you're his equal, he has no right to insult you, and no right to talk down to you like you're inferior to him. Smack him in the forehead for me please.
When he's insulting you he's either mad or just being a jerk..so I'd wait until you're having a normal conversation, and then bring this up. Make him explain himself. Not only his insults , but why he feels he needs to insult you, why he thinks he has that right, and why he can dish them out but cant deal with you confronting him on why he feels the need to insult you.
If he gets mad at that....You're married to an as*hole.. Uh...no offense.
2007-01-25 00:33:04 · answer #1 · answered by Dani 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is incredibly demeaning, you should tell him that you are fed up with his insults, and his talking down to you.....Remind him that you can leave at any time, and that MUTUAL RESPECT and LOVE will always be the better option when it comes to marriage.
Im sorry you are dealing with this, perhaps his dad was this way and now that he is married, he thinks inherently wrong on the matter of correct communication between husband and wife. I also noticed your name says ""Peaceful?".....remain that way, keep a peaceable spirit, and pray that he will have a change of heart. God Bless you both!~
2007-01-25 08:39:14 · answer #2 · answered by º§€V€Nº 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your husband's abusive. He insults you, and then says "I've had enough of your BACKTALK?" That is what an authority figure would say to a subordinate. Never let him insult you, and never let him talk to you like that. At the very LEAST, you two need some serious counseling. I would never stay in a marriage if my husband spoke to me that way.
2007-01-25 08:58:51 · answer #3 · answered by Jess H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would seem he can give the talk but not take it,you are right,,,this term is predominantly used when children speak up to their elders and are cheeky but you are his wife and have the right to challenge what you consider wrong,you are a partnership not a doormat.your husband has masculinity issues,being a man doesnt mean your opinion is the only one that counts and as partners you should have input too.better to be a successful team than one person taking all the brunt all the time.
2007-01-25 08:36:56 · answer #4 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I happen to think this is a cop out, a way of him not having to sit down like a man, an adult to discuss things properly he sounds as if he has problems being able to talk to you face to face, his communication skills are not tapped into yet and as an adult you would think they would be....sorry but he is not acting like a man here more like a spoilt brat.
2007-01-25 08:57:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you sign on to a new father when you married him? If not, don't allow it to happen. Since you asked, I'll tell you what I think. I think your husband is a jerk and I wouldn't stay in a relationship that is toxic. You'll have a miserable life.
2007-01-25 09:46:10 · answer #6 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he does not allow you to speak your mind and he seems to be very controlling always right. he does not want to hear you and how you feel. If he causes you pain you have to look at the whole relationship because someone who loves you never wants to hurt you. Good luck you got a friend.
2007-01-25 08:47:12 · answer #7 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Couldn't agree more. If he accuses you of something but cannot prove it or have a reason to back it up, then he just wants you to feel guilty of something (.... or maybe he is doing something bad behind your back and afraid that you might find out).
2007-01-25 08:36:29 · answer #8 · answered by ranselbiru 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is extremely condescending and offensive and has no place in a conversation between adults.
2007-01-25 08:57:14 · answer #9 · answered by Velouria 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that he is trying to treat you like a child, and you shouldn't stand for it. If he can not treat you like the woman you are, then I would tell him to leave.
2007-01-25 09:20:10 · answer #10 · answered by In love with Life 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋