Second grade and self esteem?

Question

My daughter is in second grade and recently she's been having problems with other kids making fun of her, for no good reasons. Its really lowering her self esteem and now she doesnt want to go to school anymore. She's an honor roll student and very intelligent for her age. She uses big words that most adults dont even think of. Could this be the problem? Could these other kids just not understand where she's coming from? How do I help her feel better about school and about who she is?? This has my husband and I really worried. We just want for her to be happy!! Thanks!

Answer 1

I know this must really be a tough situation for you, your husband and daughter. If I were you I would go to the school and talk to the school counselor. She maybe able to find out what the problem is and help your daughter (& you & your husband)
1. figure out what the problem is
2. how to deal with it
Also many schools have great conseling groups for low self asteem & peer pressure. My son was a shy child and was in a group with a few other students for low self asteem and it really helped him tremendously! Now he is out of his little shell, making lots of friends and doing good in school. I think these small groups are great! The kids make new friends in the group and realize they are not the only ones going threw things. I would encourage any parent to ask the counciler about these types of groups if their child is having any type of difficluties. The schools have all sorts of groups. I truelly hope things get better for your daughter soon, I know this must be extremely difficult for her. Good Luck!

Answer 2

She may need to be tested for a gifted class. Also, maybe if your daughter befriends the leader of bullies, then it may stop. Call the parents of the leader bully, let them know there have been a few problems in school and you'd like the kids to get to know each other better. Maybe go to the zoo or playground together. Ask one of the parents to come along also so it's supervised by both child's parent. Without the followers there to make the bully feel stronger, the child will probably be nice and have the chance to see your child differently (as a friend). If this doesn't work you'll need to involve the teacher and school. This can't continue. Good Luck!

Answer 3

Even in second grade kids can be intimidated by smarter students. You could help your daughter by explaining that the children are lashing out because they are jealous of her intelligence. The teasing may still go on but then she will know it's not that there's something wrong with her, but something wrong with the other children. You might want to talk to the school about her skipping a grade.

And don't forget to tell her how the smart kids who are picked on grow up to be the ones with good jobs that make lots of money. Talk to her about Bill Gates who must surely have been picked on as a kid and is now the richest man in the world. Find other smart role models for her and read their biographies to her - I'm sure most extraordinary people had peer trouble when they were young.

Good luck to you and her.

Answer 4

Hopefully you have talked to the teacher and the principal about this problem. There is a big movement in this country to diminish bullying, and your daughter's school needs to be aware there's a problem. There are programs they can start with the kids to nip it in the bud.
Hopefully your school system has a gifted program or a magnet school for high achievers. It's very important that you check into finding or creating a better school environment for her, even if that means putting her in a Montessori or private school where the education is of high quality and intelligent students are celebrated.

Answer 5

Yes, her high intellect and maturity, while not 'a problem,' will separate her from her peers. You should help create an atmosphere and environment for her where that is respected and valued, not a source of derision from mainstream kids.

I urge you to homeschool her so she doesn't continue this awful experience of being put down for her very gifts. Unschooling is a fabulous life and very easy in most states.

You'll save her self-esteem and her gifts. Otherwise, on the track she's on, she'll be pretending to like Britney and not know who Bach is. And dying a little inside every day.

If you help her and help her keep her self-esteem intact, when she is older, she will be so confident and empathic that she will be able to better adjust her 'presentation' for her audience. My son, now 14, is gifted, tho not in that mathematics way. When he was 5, he wanted to discuss the Odyssey with friends. He couldn't, and this would frustrate him. He, because of not being in school I believe, did not locate the problem inside himself. It didn't hurt his self-esteem. And, as a teen, he is amazing to watch talk to just anyone about anything that interests them. But goodness he enjoys the company of kids as aware and interested in the world as he is.

Answer 6

Maybe she should be tested to see if she belongs in a gifted class? She might fit in there better and have less problems with being teased since she would be with kids who think like she does.